All The Way

SPIRALLING

|8|

Surprisingly, the classes went by without much chaos, nor did James pester me anymore, due to being slightly bored or understanding, I wouldn't know.

For the first time in forever, I feel calm, even though my head has been throbbing with unanswered questions. Well at least I am not someplace like Euphoria High or something, I can't even seem to hold the pressure of an annoying 6'2 blonde.

Thanking fate for sending off Cassie before the break, she had some shopping to do I guess, I make my way towards the greenhouse. I don't even remember the last time I sat alone, surrounded by hundreds of plants, hanging pots, and the tinted glass that made the filtered light bounce off at a few surfaces, somehow still making the whole room slightly dim.

I found the greenhouse back in 2nd grade, a year after I shifted schools, on one of my random strolls during lunchtime pretending to be a witch at Hogwarts and looking for secret passages. The only two people I've ever shown this place to are Cassandra and James, the latter being the one I regret.

I remember being excited to finally have made friends with at least someone, even if it was the shy new brit. I was always bad at making friends, maybe because I was the nerd who preferred reading over socializing and fawning over sophomores. Like seriously, you're not even 10 years old and still in love with 'the guy with a skateboard!'. Disgusting.

After him, it was pretty hard for me to make friends after that until a super bubbly and talkative girl decided to sit beside me in 3rd grade. And we've been best friends ever since.

She helped me open up. I never would've realized that I was so witty and sarcastic if it wasn't for her.

Just like that, the whole lunch break passes by with James Alarie in my thoughts, and empanadas in my mouth.

♡

I didn't just keep my calm all day long, just to feel so perplexed at the end of the day. Before I met James last night, super inconveniently might I add, I had it all planned out. Go to the library every night up until the exams begin so that I can finish revising the whole thing.

But what if he's there?

I definitely want the answer to be NO. I wasn't able to read even a speck, with him lingering about. I definitely don't want to fail, and readily present a way for Alarie to win valedictorian. Nope. Not happening.

But then what will I do if he is indeed there? What if he's there and I let my facade slip for even a second and I start acting like a decent human being (he would tell the whole school and then make fun of me, maybe not the whole school part, but the fun part will surely end up true). OR what if he's already told Mrs. Walls or worse, Mr. Kumar? OR what if he doesn't do all that, but doesn't let me study at all?

But say, what if he doesn't turn up at all? That would be assuring, wouldn't it? Certainly.

WHAT IF. All these what if's are making me hazy. Like a labyrinth of thoughts, waiting to be sorted out. Aha. I know something that can help.

I quickly run into the kitchen, then mentally smack myself for being so loud at 11:30 at night, and slowly tiptoe towards our refrigerator. The bright light partially blinds me for a few seconds before I start to look around.

Ah, there it is. The Fernet-Branca. Perfect.

Fernet is kinda a big thing back in Argentina. It's got the intense flavors of rhubarb, chamomile, and saffron coursing through it, making it taste like a literal elixer.

Even though I can't legally drink it, my mom gave me a-'I don't care much, I did the same when I was your age'- look on my 16th birthday, and then proceeded to me gift a bottle of it. Latino moms are the absolute best.

I take out the bottle, along with some Coca-Cola and an ice-cube tray. I made the drink just like my mom had taught me last year and dunked it into my flask.
Will my bottle smell of alcohol after tonight? Yes, without a doubt. Do I give a single fuck about it? Nah.

I keep everything back in its place, return back to my room silently, pick up my backpack and slip out of my window. I slowly make my way towards the car and start the ignition.

As I start picking up the speed, which is quite the opposite of what I'd normally do, I put the flask to my lips and take a sip. Damn. The first thing I taste is the mint (which is actually the saffron, or at least that's what my mom told me), and then the slight sweetness from the Cola. For those side-eying me for drunk driving, I'm not. Technically.

Even though the Fernet has got a whopping 39% alcohol, which isn't a lot, even most lightweights can't get drunk on it. Hell, some people even take it to control their hangovers. It does make me calm though. Helps my nerves.

It is la mejor bebida absoluta in the whole-wide world. Not that I've had any, other than the Fernet. Still.
(the absolute best drink)

Since I was already out of my daily element, I put on the radio and roll down the windows. Just as I change to another station, a song starts and I can't stop myself from singing along.

The greatest romance
lightning strike to my heart
We would slow dance
in the headlights,
in the parking lot
There was no chance
of ever falling apart
But you've noticed that I'm here
but I'm so far

'Cause I've been running from the sun
And I've got nowhere left to hide (oh oooho)

Every night I close my eyes
And wish I was still in love
Trying to fight,
at war with my mind
It's gonna kill me to give you up
Darling, this is gonna hurt
No, I won't regret it
'Cause I loved you first
But someone will love you better

Before I know it, I am strolling towards the back door, humming to the beats of Johnny Orlando. This dude has got the most splendid voice and mind-blowing lyrics of all time. Period.

I break out of my happy trance as I see the door already open and lights filling the library with the second door slightly ajar.

I guess fate wasn't with me after all.

I make my way inside, still sipping from my flask, and start towards the table when I see a blur of blonde and black clothes. Before I could call out to him, he turns around with an-almost funny expression. He looks like a deer in front of headlights with a hint of relief peeking through in form of a sigh.

WAS THOMAS JAMES ALARIE WAITING FOR ME TO SHOW UP?

♡

A/N: The song I used in this chapter is 'Someone will love you better' by Johnny Orlando. Do show lots of love to the underrated king.

Do vote for the story if you liked it, it would mean the world to me :))