A/N: TW: smut/drugs/blood
I grabbed it slowly and pulled the zipper down to his waist, when in the back of my drugged mind I realized, that this was a fur suit. My jaw dropped when he stripped it off and finally revealed his face.
IT WAS ELON MUSK IN A REMY FURSUIT!!! OH MY DADDD
He moved his sexy defined body over to me and slowly pulled out a vibrator in the shape of a Tesla with the matching key-remote-thing and licked my beard, with a lustful emotion on his face. He slowly undressed me while keeping eye contact, very awkwardly. His long dick tapped against my bare feet, while he was moving, he turned me around to face the hello-kitty-wallpaper-wall.
Small throwback, I actually did meet Hello Kitty once, she is actually still lusting for my blood, because I offered her a cookie and she doesn't have a mouth. Yea she is way more cruel than always described.
Being lost in thought I only remembered where I was when Elon Musk started thrusting in me, very fast. I moaned and sweat dripped down my face as he went harder and harder on me. Everything went really well until, he started moaning out "AH TESLA MH", which I found quite weird, like what is he thinking about? The muffler? A Tesla doesn't even have a muffler though? Well he started fucking me so hard, that my face smashed against the wall and my eyes started only seeing a mix of pink hello-kitty-wallpaper and my own blood, dripping down my face, when all of the sudden Elon Musk collapsed onto me, burring his dick deep inside of me. I couldn't move under the weight of him and someone else, so I started coughing for air, until finally all of the weight stopped pressing me onto the Claudia Roth carpet and with a last moan as his dick exited my body, I passed out.
When I woke again, I found myself looking into the very manly face of Lightning McQueen, who somehow grew hands and legs and looked at me very worriedly.
"Are you fine, Cheesy dude?"
"H- h- huh? W- w- w- what happened?", I stuttered, knowing damn well, that I don't even stutter usually and I just do it to be quirky.
I looked around the room, also spotting Phillip Amthor and Ed Sheeran doing the devils tango in the back, when Lightning McQueen snapped his fingers in front of my face to get the attention back to him.
"I saved you from Elon Musk, because damn Mozzarella dude, you're too fine for him"
I gasped for air, due to how much this statement offended me. I pulled my Duolingo Bird out of my ear, that I have held there for years and trew it at Lightning McQueen, who instantly gave in and started crying for his mom, as the Duolingo Bird crushed him under his tank.
I grabbed him by the wrist and the Duolingo Bird also crushed Phillip Amthor and Ed Sheeran and we trew them in a bag and pulled them out of the house and teleported to mine, where I trew them into my harem basement. I was just watching them through my camera, where King Julian and Shrek were aggressively playing stone-paper-scissors, when Duolingo Bird walked up to me and asked me in his very low masculine voice (you can imagine it like Corpse Husband) and german accent.
"Hello Fadder, my lord and savior."
I nodded at him and asked him what he wanted to say to me.
"Can I join se harem pleaze?"
"Mhm sure you do", I reply.
"Sank you"
"Uhuh" I say, while still watching my camera.
I decided this was enough activity for the day, so I just went out to bully some gingers.
A/N: I regret every life choice ever made by me and I am so incredibily sorry-
