A/N: Hey! Just to start this off, Mars and I have been gone for a really long while. I had a medical thing going on, and we both started school and work. Writing has kind of been pushed to the side. We're working on the new chapter now, but until then, here's some more bloopers.
B1: "Okay this is where I live, small place, within walking distance."
"Cool banana beans."
"Woah look Armeen and jaeger with mi casa."
B2: milk milk milk milk milk milk milk milk milk milk milk milk milk milk= milk mil
B3: "Since then, I've been a titan slaying vagina queen master and I killed all the titans to ever exist so they should stop recruiting people because i'm cooler than levi's badussy"
They clapped their badussys together, up and down, and all around town. Rory
B4: "What's wrong with her?"
"She was in the rear left flank."
"Oh..." Yikeys man
B5: I shut my eyes tightly, attempting to bring in calming breaths. I could only muster shallow staggered breaths. I wasn't getting enough air, someone save me. SOmeone like a prince charming, like Levi. He has such beautiful hair, thats a prince right?
B6: Dear Kay, recently I've felt like you are the toxic one in this relationship def not me. I feel like we need to talk this out now. Hoe would you feel if I left you for someone I didn ecen know yeah you would probs be tots pissed off but I dont even care because guess what you are gay and I hate the gays.
B7: Dear Mars, on the contrary I feel like you've been rather toxic to me. I look at a text and you threaten to die. I don't see how this is healthy for either of us. I think it 's in your best interest as well as mine to move away from each other and pursue different lives. awa y from one another. I will get a restraining order. Please do not contact me again. Sincerely, k
B8: "Commander," I began, cautiously choosing my words. "With all due respect, I'm not sure I'm ready." Maybe it would deter him.
Erwin's smile beamed. "Lol too bad you dont have a choice again"
B9: DEAR RORY AREN'T YOU SO EXCITED TO #BE TREATED LIKE AN ANIMAL AND PEOPLE FEAR YOU BC THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND AND ALSO #SEE ADALYNN GO INTO CRAZY MURDERER MODE AND KIND OF BE SCARED OF WHAT HER JOB IN THE UNDERGROUND USED TO BE? NO? WELL TOO BAD.
TYPE WHORE DO YOUR FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW! Thank you for your time.
Sincerely, your favorite boss, AT LEAST I BETTER BE
Mars. <3
B10: Poo poo pee pee if you don't write soon i'll combust and kill everyone in your family. I want you to write this kiss scene already bc its so hard for me to wait i am impatient. Working on it too. Is not working well. Still impatient as you're telling me a poop story and i'm writing this randomly. Also you're eating a cakepop. Yum ig. Gonna be a quick and cute little steamy kiss scene yay so exciting and then adalynn is gonna throw up on both of them and kill everyone tooo them rory will shift and eat everyone except for adalynn and be like "girl why you do that they're out friends" and adalynn will be like "bc you hS THE AUDACTITY t o makeout in our tent for a minute and a half and its not like it was sexy but you're so gross rory die"
B11: Her face was bright red. In our close proximity, I could hear the rapid beating of her heart, accompanied by panting and outright gasps for air. "You okay?"
I nodded slowly so as to not knock her off of me. "Yes baby gorl nothing can take me down"
"OMG YOU CAN TALK???"
"WHAT I CAN TALK?"
B12: Hey guys so i'm so CUTE but also shy and have ANXIETY OKAY. ugh anyway so Im crazy skilled but not TOO skilled BUT i am also a tit-an SHIFTEr Ugh i know crazy right. But don't forget the only person that knows is Adalynn. Yes her name is adalynn. OMG DID U SAY HER NAME BACK TF OFF> anyway I really like hange so I makeout with her to show her my affection. WHAT i am Not using her for her BODY. I mean she is HAWT. But like my parents are dea UWU. SO sad and different from literally EVERY character, wdym no?
B13: He was supes hot but IDC i do NOT like him and I also am mean guys so THis is why i have UNDERGOUND trauma THE UNDERGROUND bc that is WHERE I AM from BTW so i am real talented too bc i have TRAUMA ok also UGh i only like RORY guys only her. Also, I'm supes hot but i hate everyone. Ew hange and Rory *throw up noises* also i am a CLEAN FREAK.
B14: Adalynn began to talk, "I LOVE bullying people. Do you want me to bully them into submission? They WILL like you after that. I promise."
B15: She was being a bitch, not immediately sharing her tea, I turned to her throwing my fist to her cheek. Hah, try that girl.
B16: So basically I'm sitting here and watching the stars. Because uh my moms haven't talked about that for like 10 chapters probs so yeah... Anyway. They're supes pretty and I love them. And now I want to sit back and relax and enjoy my evening when all of a sudden I hear this agitating grating voice. Fucking Rory. Panic attack hoe. God dammit, now I have to console her.
So I go over to this crybaby baby and hug her.
"Don't worry girl its fine"
"Jet is gonna kill everyone girl you dont get it"
"Now who the fuck is jet? You crazy bitch. I knew we should have kept you in the cells."
Rory look flabbergasted, like i shat on her hand or something. "But you wanted me up here?"
"Uh... until you ruined my peaceful night. You're super insensitive."
God, what a bitch.
"I had a night terror oh my god adalynn."
So? What does that matter you little hoe bag? Get over it. Tell the terror to go away. Oh my god she is so fucking annoying. Go die you hoe.
"Shut up im trying to watch the dead things in the sky!!!!" I said kindly.
Rory started crying like a baby. "There are dead people everywhere omg lynn help me help help"
"SHUT UP YOU ASSHOLE LET ME LOOK AT MY PRETTY CIRCLES"
Rory's sobs grew louder, and then she was convulsing. Oh god not a seizure. What an attention whore
So obvi i ran over and shook her. "GIRL WHART"
"I SHARTED I THINK ADALYNN CHECK"
I looked at her booty. A big... fat shart streak. Brown and nasty. "EW GIRL" now she was the one to shat on my hand.
B17: . My mind faltered, going blank as I mindlessly walked to get Rory a glass.
"Oh sorry addy" Alvar said grabbing my waist, bringing me in.
"You know I may just take you for myself."mHe said smmoooching me.
I pushed past him, making my way to the cabinets. "I could ask you the same thing, Alvar." I turned back around, glaring at him. Then, I punched him in the nuts.
B18: I cleared my throat of any fear before repeating myself, "Hast thou ever slain another?"
YOU ARE READING
Petrichor
AçãoWhen the world is ravaged by abnormal beings up to 15 meters tall, the survival of mankind doesn't seem likely. But thanks to three walls protecting citizens, they've managed to escape extinction. When Adalynn is recruited from the underground by Ro...
