Heart of Steel: B. Bradshaw

Twenty- Little Sun

The phone rang through to voicemail. The faint trill buzzed through Steely's ears and she laid curled up on the floor of her kitchen. She breathed out a sigh, the motion constricting against the tightness in her chest.

"Hi B," she paused as her voice broke. "I don't know why I called but I guess I just wanted to hear your voice. There's no need to call back I'm okay, well, I will be okay. I'm sorry for what I said. I miss you."

There was a heavy silence as Steely pulled herself together. "Don't worry about me. Goodbye," she ended the phone call before sliding her phone away from her.

The tile of the kitchen floor was cold against her cheek as she laid her head down and closed her eyes. Steely had never felt pain like this before, she didn't understand how she was supposed to live with this gaping hole in her chest.

She couldn't stop crying. The tears were coming non stop and there was nothing she could do to calm herself down. If she kept going like this she was going to make herself sick but she couldn't focus on anything else besides the unbearable pain.

Uncle Ice was a major part of her life since the moment she was born. He made her laugh, he taught her how to ride a bike, he taught her patience and understanding, but most of all he gave her the passion she had for flying.

She couldn't fathom that she would never see him again. Steely needed her Uncle Ice to breathe. Her dad needed Ice to breathe and if she felt this way herself how was she supposed to pick her dad up and march through the rest of their lives together. Steely can't even imagine making it to the end of the week with this unimaginable pain pressing so harshly against her broken heart.

Steely's cries turned into loud wails when the front door swung open. She heard the loud footsteps following her voice but she couldn't bring herself to stop crying. Her throat was raw as she practically laid in a pool of tears.

Maverick's face contorted into a nasty frown as he enterd the kitchen with Slider. He looked down and saw the girl curled up into a ball so small he almost missed her. Maverick took a few steps forward and smoothed his hand over Steely's back.

Her skin was ice to the touch. His frown deepened the moment he realized how freezing she must have been. Maverick understood the feeling of being so struck down with grief that you can't muster up the energy to take care of yourself.

He felt the same way when he lost Goose. Maverick could understand that feeling. He was also heartbroken over the loss of Iceman. But he knew in this moment that he had to do whatever he could to get Steely off this floor and back into a plane.

"Sunshine, it's time to get up your freezing."

She didn't move. The tears never stopped. They only seemed to grow more ferocious as his voice broke her out of her thoughts.

"Do I have to call Neil?"

Maverick reached into his pocket to pull out his phone. He tapped the screen for a short while before bringing the phone towards Steely's face. She looked at the screen to see Neil's phone number ready to be called. Maverick watched as she didn't make any indication that she cared.

Steely was stuck to the floor. Her bones felt hollow and unmoving as she laid in silence. The two men stared quietly down at her. Maverick stood up and walked out of the room. Steely could hear Neil's voice muffled through the phone.

She looked up to see her dad staring down at her with a sad smile. He leaned down and wiped a chunk of hair away from her face. "It's okay baby Neil will be here soon."

Her dad was right because before she knew it her bestfriends face came into view. He hooked his arms under Steely's shoulders and pulled her into a sitting position. The heat from his chest spread slowly across her back. "Oh you stupid girl why didn't you call me sooner. You're going to make yourself sick."

"Why won't you let anyone help you, why won't you let me help you?" he questioned

"I don't know how they can help. I'm so lost Neil, I don't think I can do this anymore," Steely's voice was hoarse with inactive noise.

"Can I tell you a story?" Neil shifted once more so that he could rest his chin on the top of her head. She smelled and felt like the same person but there was something missing and he was determined to get his best friend back.

"Do you remember the first day we met, at the Naval program? I was so nervous that morning."

Steely remembered that day like it was yesterday. The room was full of bright eyed, young pilots. Each person was fresh into the program and eager to begin. They would all do trial and error to see who flew best with who.

At the time, Steely was the only girl and nobody outwardly wanted to pair with her but she held her head high regardless.

"I remember seeing you hide in the corner by yourself too nervous to ask anyone," her voice came out quiet and weak but it made Neil's lips turn up slightly at the corners.

"True, but you marched right over and grabbed a hold of my arm. You weren't taking no for an answer as you dragged me to the front of the room declaring us partners."

"Good thing for me we worked so well together," she was right. They were the perfect team both up in the sky and down on the ground.

"Best thing that ever happened to me," Neil looked down at her fondly. Although he couldn't see her face he could feel the tension slowly dissipating. Not by much but he would take it.

"Oh stop it," Steely playfully slapped his knee.

"I'm serious Steel. You have become part of me and I can't imagine how my life would be if you didn't rag doll me around that day."

Steely stayed quiet as she thought about Neil. Besides her Uncle, Neil was Steely's tether to herself. He gave her the confidence and the support she needed to become the pilot she is today. He is truly her best friend.

"I miss you little sun, please come back to me."

It was so easy for Steely to break down in Neil's arms. He's held her through her worst and best days. Was someone she could turn to when there was no one else. As they sat on the cold kitchen floor Steely let herself break down one more time in his arms.

She was so sick of being numb. She was sick of the pity glances she got from her father. She was sick of the fighting she's been doing with Bradley. She misses being able to crack jokes with Neil while they were up in the air. Steely was done letting herself waste away with heartbreak. She was going to show everyone just who she was.

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Happy Halloween to all who celebrate it! I hope your day was fun and safe. I apologize for the late update as I have been experiencing quite a bit of writers block but I plan to get another chapter out here in the next few days, thank you for your patience and I hope you enjoy!!!

-mad.