Finding themselves

The other point of view

Jungkook got up after a sleepless night. He regretted immensely the way Jimin had found out. He could still see the desolate look in Jimins eyes and knew he had hurt him.
He didn't know exactly when these thoughts had crept into his head, after all they had been happy together but his time in the military had made him more confident and outgoing he began to think he was limiting his options by not trying pastures new. He had always shied away from girls before and just fallen into a comfortable relationship, but now? Maybe he should try dating girls or other boys?
There was still that inner voice that said what the hell are you doing !
It was like he wanted Jimin but was afraid they had grown up and apart while in the military, or was it because he was the one who dwindled down the phone calls, tried ignoring them because what was there to talk about? Jimin had always talked about what they would do where they could go, but was that just falling back into a routine? Or was he overthinking things?  He felt confused , what ifs becoming , so what..... but always there was Jimins sad demeanour but resignation that Jungkook was no longer sure of their relationship.
His phone started pinging with messages from the others sorry about the breakup but supporting them both.
Tae gave him a verbal ass kicking for putting him in that situation but also said Jimin had told him not to take sides and that it couldn't be helped.
If anything this made Jungkook feel more guilty, Jimin always gave so much of himself and always apologised for things that weren't his fault, he knew Jimin was probably right now tearing himself apart wondering where he had gone wrong.
This deeply upset Jungkook, he had always hated seeing Jimin hurt, from hate Mail to biased fans , Jimin took everything to heart, the overly confident young Jimin wasn't a true version of himself as Jungkook came to realise during their relationship, he was only confident around the group members, sometimes a little sassy, but in other situations quite shy.
He was an amazing dancer putting everything into it hours of training until he got pleased at the result another side of his lack of confidence in himself.
Jungkook sighed, this sitting here wasn't working he would go to the gym at company headquarters he knew no fans could bother him there.
Getting out at the floor the gym and practice rooms were he walked along his glance catching someone through one of the windows. Recognising the small figure he quietly stood outside watching as Jimin threw himself into an old dance routine. It looked like he'd been there for a while his t shirt covered in sweat sticking to his well toned body. He stumbled bending over to catch his breath then just flopping to the floor , defeat and tiredness showing as he lay back eyes closed.
Jungkook almost went in to check he was ok but then Jimin stood up got some bottled water and carried on.
Jungkook sighed then walked on to the gym.
He spent an hour there sweating out his body trying to work away the stress.
He showered then made his way out automatically glancing towards the room Jimin had been in, sure he would be gone now, but he was wrong, Jimin was still there working away but stopping more as he got tired, he stood up his eyes meeting zjungkooks the pair staring at each other before Jimin turned away, shutting Jungkook out.
This in itself was a novelty, Jimin had always hung onto every word every look from the other, but that, turning away to block him was new..... and not so welcome Jungkook realised.
He told himself it was bound to happen, this awkwardness would pass after all they would be working together again, worryingly his heart jumped a little at the thought.
Two days passed, he got a call from RM to say the group was being called to a meeting at the end of the week to discuss plans going forward.
"It's at ten on Friday Jungkook ok?"
"Yes sure, er RM where is Jimin staying?"
"He has the use of a company apartment, have you only just realised he hasn't got his own place anymore???"
"I..., no, of course not but I didn't know who to ask."
"Ok, we'll I hope you two wil be ok when we all get together."
"Of course we will, we can still be friends can't we ?"
He heard a sigh from the other end," I hope so Kook I really do."
Hanging up Jungkook went to clean his room. Now Jimin had moved out it looked bleak, empty. He remembered how often he had moaned about the colourful plushies Jimin kept around , they were something Jimin kept to hug when he felt a bit low, he had told Jimin he didn't need them because he had him to hug.Jimin had always put them aside and run to hug him. He was glad Jimin had them with him now.
He redid his closet trying to fill the empty spaces where Jimins stuff had hung . Giving up eventually and going to makhqe some ramen to eat.
The days passed until it was Friday, Jungkoonk  felt a little excited, he would see Jimin today!!!!
He was picked up and taken to his company headquarter strolling in , he looked around but couldn't see the others then RMM poked his head out a door" in here Kook."
He went in being greeted by all except Jimin who kept his head down. Jungkook was astonished at the others change, where he had been healthy looking now he was pale his face gaunt. He looked ill.
The manager came in he too glanced at Jimin looking worried.
"Well guys nice to have you back, so let's discuss plans,"
They talked together RM and Suga saying they had a few songs written to show the others the manager telling them about upcoming radio and Tv interviews.
It was decided they would get together on Monday and sort songs and ideas out. Through it all Jimin just listened not joining in. The others noticed but didn't say anything.
"Right guys how about going out partying tomMmorrow night? We won't be able to do it fomr a while and it will give us time to get back in the old routine. They all nodded even Jimin who needed some sort of release, so it was agreed the time and place and they all left the room. Going into the lift. Jimin pressed a button for the floor below.
"You going to the gym?" Hobi asked
"No the practice room I need to practice a bit, I've become slow ."'
Jungkook frowned but didn't say a  word. But looked worriedly as Jimin stepped out.
"See you tomorrow," Jimin said waving  .
The door closed so none of them saw jimin wobble and drop to the floor passing out.