Lost In The Dark

Chapter 4

"Colorado Springs!" I roared into the mic. "Thanks for the awesome show! You guys rock!" Then Jayy and I ran off the stage. Our crew greeted us with cheers and hugs, I honestly loved performing, it had been something I had always wanted to do, and now I was doing it! Life couldn't get better then this. Of course, that was the exact moment Jayy decided to sidle up next to me, he slipped his hand into mine, I blushed slightly, now life couldn't get more perfect. I smiled timidly at Jayy, he beamed at me. Jeffree ran toward us,we immediately stuffed our hands in our pockets. Jeffree arched a pink eyebrow and looked at us curiously before gushing out. 

"Know what we're doing tonight?" He squealed and bounced up and down. 

"Ummm...no?" Jayy ventured. 

"Party!" Jeffree screamed out! We high-five'd each other and quickly went out to the bus where the music was already shaking the poor vehicle. When we opened the door Bree Bree by Brokencyde blasted our eardrums out, there was a ton of people crammed into the small bus, even so,we snaked our way through the crowd and into the center of the party, We danced, grinding, and teasing, bottles in hand we drank, the world spun and that made everything blend into an amazing array of colors and sounds. Suddenly I was pushing my way through the crowd tugging Jayy behind me. I threw open the door to my room and froze. Everything slowed down and all I could see was Jeffree's head tilting back in pleasure as he lowered himself onto a dark haired guy, see his mouth open as he moaned. At this moment Jayy stumbled into me. 

"Whoa what's going on..HOLY SHIT!" Jayy quickly slammed the door shut and tugged me away from my room and back into the throng of people and out the bus door. Breathing heavily I doubled over hands on my knees. Never had I seen something so...so...so hot! Jayy placed his hand on my shoulder, I snapped around, took his hand, and ran into the hotel. The ride to our room seemed to take forever! At last we pushed the door open and stumbled onto the bed. Kissing furiously, our hands roamed over each other desperate to explore every inch of skin. Then Jayy was tugging on my shirt, I lifted my arms and let him remove my shirt, then he was fumbling with his pants, and that's when everything changed. 

Images made from smoky tendrils of fog materialized from thin air. Fear pounded icy blood through my veins, I could do nothing but stare as the scene unfolded before my eyes. A boy, spiky haired and covered in makeup walks into the boys locker room on his first day of middle school, three jocks approach him from the other side of the room, the scent of old sweat and mold seems overpowering. Rough hands stroked his hair and the nape of his neck. Lips whispered dangerously close to his ear suggesting -no, demanding- things. Goosebumps covered the boy's arms. The smoke boy shook his head, the three jocks became angry. The smoke blurs and becomes a different image. A rundown shed at the far end of the soccer field. Weeds have snaked up the gray wood blocking the windows, the door hangs slightly ajar. The boy closes his eyes and holds a clenched fist to his mouth to keep from screaming, burning pain travels through his body, they leave him on the dirt floor crying and unable to walk. He can hear them laughing as they walk away. 

"Get away from me!" I scream out and push myself away from Jayy, shaking against the wall I bring my knees up to my chest and cry. I hadn't had a flashback in years! Why Now? When everything was so perfect and I was happy. I felt filthy and disgusted, dirty and terrified. What had I ever done to deserve something like that! Just because of how I dressed? That was no reason for them to...I was gonna barf. I bolted from the bed and ran into the bathroom, I reached the toilet in time to feel the bile rising in my throat, I retched into the toilet, breathing hard I prepared myself for the heaving. My stomach muscles convulsed and more watery bile spilled from my throat into the porcelain bowl. 

"Dahvie?" Jayy said worriedly from the doorway. I flinched. 

"Leave me alone Jayy." I whispered to him. He must not have listened because soon he was by my side holding my hair away from my face while I vomited my guts out. At last I stood up and rinsed my mouth in the sink, Jayy hovered inches from me, sniffling I turned and walked back to the bed, I sat hugging my knees to my chest, Jayy sat cross-legged in front of me. His eyes were sad and worried, I couldn't bear to look at him, I averted my eyes. Jayy leaned forward and took me into his lap, he hugged me close and smoothed my hair while shushing me and telling me it was alright.