Hold Me 'till the rain stops

Chapter 1: fresh wounds

Elliana:
I knew I was dreaming. You know
when you have those kind of dreams when you know you're dreaming, but hold on to it because you don't want to wake up just yet? I was dreaming that kind of a dream. And I knew it because I could hear birds chirping outside of my windows, beckoning me to get  up and start my day already.
Usually, these chirps would have managed to make me smile, but not today.
I've been called an optimist before. And not your regular kind of optimist. I was told I'm "annoyingly optimistic" because I often only see the good in things. And that point of view changed. It changed in 10 short minutes.

You see, two weeks ago, my family was engulfed by a dark cloud of grief and sorrow. We got a news that my grandparents, had died in a car crash, in New York. They wanted to surprise their friends with a visit, since they hadn't seen each other in years, but they'd hardly made it into the city in their car,  when they crashed.
According to the doctor, grandpa immediately died due to impact of the accident and grandma died in the ambulance on the way to the hospital that was called by some kind passer-by.
It felt like my head was pushed into a pool of water, because I couldn't breathe. I felt broken, I felt numb. I was extremely close with my grandparents. Mostly because we lived in the same house and I have always been homeschooled, because of our wealth and status, it wasn't safe for me to attend a proper school.
My grandparents were brought to California through a jet and they were burried. It just felt unreal. Two weekends ago, we were all laughing and giggling on grandpa's dumb jokes and today, they were gone.

Today, two weeks later, we were supposed to have some kind of a formal dinner with old friends of my grandparents- the ones they went to see in New York i guess and they wanted to formally extend their condolences, and business partners, who wanted to formally extend their condolences and according to my mother, keeping family around during difficult times helps us feel better. I'd literally do anything to get over this dull ache of loss I feel in my chest all day, even as I sleep.
After staring into the void, I finally gave us and walked into the shower, hoping to at least look civilised, in contrast to the zombie I was feeling like from within.

After self reflecting in the shower for nearly 15 minutes, I walked on fresh and clean and smelling like bearberry and blackcurrant.  showers actually work wonders. I felt a little better as I got dressed and put on a hint of make-up.
I walked down, towards the dining room, just to find my parents silently eating their breakfast.
The past two weeks haven't been easy for my family, more so for my parents, especially mom.
My dad, even though a fully grown adult, looked broken because he lost his parents and his very support. And my mother, she never had mother of her own, so when she married my dad, my grandma became everything she never had. This wasn't easy for mom, especially since my grandpa- my mom's dad died just a little over a year ago from a heart attack.
Losing so much in one year definitely didn't come easy to her. She had cried a lot the past year.
I sat down at the table and one of the maids served me my breakfast- pancakes and banana and blueberries, along with a smoothie bowl and juice. I thanked her and she nodded and smiled, probably feeling sorry fore as well. We all ate in silence for a good part of the breakfast, when dad suddenly cleared his throat and mom's and my attention snapped towards him.
"Uh-they will be here at 8. The laurents and they said they're also bringing their grandson"

"Alright", my mom said as she plastered a smile across her face, as she tried to hide her sadness. "I guess everyone has their hands full today, but I'm expecting to see you two for lunch in a few hours". So she WASN'T going to talk it out herself.
In my family, we may love eachother very much, but we're not good at expressing sorrow. Especially mom. So I have to intervene.
"Mom", I said as I raised my hand and covered hers, that was resting on the table "I know these are painful times. We just lost grandma and grandpa. I'm in shock too. I mean everytime I close my eyes, I just hope all of this is a dream. But we can't let that keep us from moving forward. Grandma and grandpa wouldn't want that. They'd want us to be happy, and not loom over their death untill we die from the inside too. So we have to be strong, and we have to do it together."
My mom just smiled and nodded and I could see the tears threatening to leave her eyes, as she grabbed a few tissues and dried waterline of her eyes.
"Thank you" she said, that barely ame out as a whispered, but I knew she felt better.
I know I did.
                                   ~~~
The rest of the day was pretty productive. I got a lot of studying done. I studied, ate and studied again, until it was about 7:30pm, when Iris, the head of the maids and the one who's incharge of my room knocked on my door and said that my mother has asked me to get ready for the dinner tonight.
After contemplating on what to wear for a good 10 minutes, I finally decided on casual and classy.
I chose a beautiful deep red dress, that I had recently purchased. It had a turtle-neck and the front was short, just a few inches above my knees, while the back was long and flowed down to my calves. Simply brushing through my hair, I let it down and only went for a light BB creame and mascara and clear gloss. I hated going overboard with makeup. I pared the dress with delicate red heels and set off for the dinner.

Walking through the long hallway in my house, as I made a way towards the staircases, I found the door to my grandparents's door on an ajar. Weird. Unless it was anyone from the staff that wanted to clean the room, I don't see why the doo is open. The cleaning staff, however, would close the door after the cleaning process. And my parents are already in the dining hall, so I might as well see who opened the door. With that, I made a beeline towards the room and pushed the door open.

                                ~~~