the sunset tonight blossomed in all its glory, hues of amber and blushes of rose fused together on this canvas that was the sky. I admire Reece's side profile, the heavenly colours that reflected into his skin, the fire of the sun that burnt in his eyes and the trickle of gold that dazzled around the perimeter of his face. His eyes were steady on the horizon, he didn't notice my staring, nor did I want him to, I was at peace with the way we were right now.
He made me want to get back into my portraits again, scrap my whole landscape phase and begin to sketch him, I'd think about the colours I'd use to portray him, I'd think about what I'd write about him in my description, I'm certain I wouldn't have to scribble out any words so people wouldn't suspect we were together, he wasn't like Zac was.
Reece's phone buzzed, I darted my gaze to the sea but saw him typing away in the corner of my eye, he looked over at me before resuming his typing. He placed his phone screen side down on the grass before it chimed again and again. I look at the phone then I look over at him, his hand reaches out to mine, his thumb running tiny circles on top of my hand.
"who is it?" I ask, we've never had the issue of someone disturbing us before and I just wondered what had changed.
"my dad, he wants to know if I'll be getting dinner-" he said but he's cut off by more raucous coming from his phone. His hand unlatches from mine as he puts his phone on silent, but I could still hear it vibrate amongst the grass.
"it seems important" I spoke, not overly convinced that it was his family, I didn't want Reece lying to me though.
"don't you trust me?" he awkwardly laughed and with statements like that, he's giving me plenty of reason not to. We brushed the mark topic under the rug, but I knew my mind was littered with other things Reece had said that I wanted to know more about, one of them being Lara.
I didn't answer him, I didn't want to give him the satisfaction that I did trust him, I wanted him to prove to me that I could trust him.
"Reece, is everything okay?" I asked, removing my hand from his touch, I wanted to edge away from him too, something was up, as in something that was making my heart sink a little. That feeling you get when you know somethings wrong but you can't work out if it's a positive or negative energy, but your mind inflicts these nasty thoughts making your stomach grow more and more uncomfortable, it's as if I'm on the verge of a panic attack but I didn't have enough stamina to create one.
"Yeah it's fine, it's just my dad," he choked awkwardly, this time I shuffled back slightly. His arm reached out to grab me but paused as Reece was trying to figure out my emotions. "Shiloh?" he said confused.
Something about the way he was trying to reach to me was telling me with all my might I should stay back. I think I was still hesitant from the few days he ventured back home, there was a certain aura about him, something changed.
"I haven't been honest about my feelings I guess, I'm still trying to work it all out," he sighed, his agitated hands began tearing shards of grass out from beneath him.
"What do you mean Reece, is there something else?" I asked, my mind began to clog with delusional thoughts and all the sweet nothings that escaped from Reece's lips.
"I've just been trying to figure out everything, where my head is at and that may be why I've been a bit secluded." he spoke, but I don't think he was too sure about what he was saying either.
"I can't prove any more to you Reece, if you're unsure then maybe I should just leave," I sighed after a pause, I struggled with opening up and although it may seem like I've been pretty reserved with Reece, he knew more about me than any other person that had walked into my life. I've shown him my rawest and most vulnerable side. Heck, he showed up to my sisters anniversary and held me as I wept away an ocean.
"No no it's not that at all Shiloh, it's just me," he spoke but I could feel him getting angry at himself and why he just couldn't figure out what he wanted.
"If I'm not what you want Reece then what are we doing here, what's all this been about?" I questioned him, picking up off of his vibe and I could feel myself getting aggravated, not with Reece but with myself for opening up to someone only to be left empty.
"it's been so much more and I wouldn't change the past couple of months at all Shiloh, I know what I have to do and the truth is, it's scaring me." he spoke, taking his turn and exposing his true self to me.
"I cant convince you Reece and I don't want to try, if it's not what you want then why don't we close the book on this chapter," I sighed. He looked up at me with weary eyes and nonchalantly shook his head at me.
"I can't do that Shiloh, you've become part of my routine, I can't quit you," he spoke softly, his voice shaky and his breaths getting hitched. He knew with each helpless thought he cried, I'd get more distant, but he couldn't stop himself from speaking the truth.
"you don't have to quit me but maybe we should take a break from this, revisit the situation next week to see if anything's changed," I expressed. "you know where I'll be if you change your mind,"
YOU ARE READING
beach//reece bibby
Romance"You're like a daisy; you've been trod on and become so closed up with every gloomy day that passes, you need to focus on the brighter ones so you can bloom," he spoke as he twiddled a daisy between his fingers. "A daisy?" I questioned, my voice hoa...
