Undercover - In China - Book 7

Part 22 - Black Socks Never Get Dirty

Dr Zhang suggested we should get some sleep and offered us the rolls of paper. 'They're blankets,' he explained. 'They're surprisingly warm.'

We dragged straw filled pallets around the tiny brazier and wrapped ourselves in the paper blankets as Dr Zhang gave us a lecture on paper making. 'Paper was invented in China by pounding worn-out clothing into a pulp. Most cloth was made from plant fibres. The pulp was then lifted out, and dried, on bamboo screens.

'It is not yet used for writing. They still prefer to write on strips of wood. Paper is mostly used for toilet paper, blankets and . . . armour.'

  Licia yawned. 'What are we going to do about Denny?'

 'Ah-um. The abbot told me Denny . . . the foreigner . . . was at the monastery until a month ago. When the city guards came looking for him the abbot sent him to stay with a relative near Jiangling. But first, I need to meet with a friend in Xinye to find out what is happening. We arrived in the middle of a war here and Kongming is the advisor to the Tiger Generals.'

'Tiger Generals?' We all asked at the same time so Dr Zhang gave us a brief history lesson. The Tiger Generals were Lui Bei Xuande, Lord Guan and Zhang Fei, three of the most famous heros in Chinese history. During a peasant uprising in 184 AD near the end of the 400 year-long Han dynasty, they had sworn an oath to defend each other as brothers. And, as China broke up into warring factions, they had fought to reestablish the rule of the last Han emperor. 

 Meanwhile in Britain, the Roman occupation was 150 years old and it would be another nine hundred years before anyone spoke English.

In northern China, the infamous warlord Cho Cho eventually defeated all his rivals, took the young emperor, Xian, captive and began to rule in his name. This usurpation deeply offended Xuande, who was distantly related to the emperor, so he quit Cho Cho's army and moved south, to the Han River valley. There, Lui Biao, Lord Protector of Jingzhou Province and Xuande's fellow kinsman, was pleased to have the help of three tiger generals. He put them in charge of the city of Xinye, in the northern part of the province, where they were the first line of defence against Cho Cho's forces.

In December 208 CE, Lui Biao was dying and his second wife and her brother intended to surrender to Cho Cho. Xuande knew that the few loyal soldiers under his command were no match for Cho Cho's huge army so, when he learned of a young man with reputation as a military genius, he begged for his help. 

 Zhuge Kongming was at first reluctant to join the tiger generals but Xuande was persistent and eventually Kongming agreed. And so began the most famous relationship in China's history. 

 We wanted to know more but we were all falling asleep.

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 Servants woke us early with a breakfast of rice porridge and tea. Miguel asked if there were any chocolate chip cookies but Dr Zhang pointed out that cacao came from south America which hadn't been discovered by Europeans yet.

He was wearing a black robe with loose sleeves and his long hair was tied into a bun on top of his head and partially hidden by a funny, rolled up chefs' hat. He studied us with an exasperated frown. 

 'Ah-um. I could be mistaken for a local but you three look like aliens.' 

We were wearing the jeans and sweaters we normally wore in Ottawa. 'And, Licia, eye glasses will not be invented for another fifteen hundred years.' 

 Licia looked embarrassed, 'Sorry. I forgot to put my contact lenses in.' She wrapped her glasses in a tissue and tucked them into her shoulder bag.

Dr Zhang sighed. 'Ah-um. Please, don't let anyone see you putting contact lenses in. They haven't been invented either. You'll frighten people to death. Did you bring anything else inappropriate?' 

 'I have some vials of mercaptan,' Licia announced proudly, taking one of the glass capsules from her bag.

'Skunk juice,' Miguel explained. 'For defensive purposes.'

Dr Zhang sighed and asked one of the servants to find some clothes for us. A few minutes later we were trying on Chinese robes, trousers and boots. We packed our own clothes into bags woven from some kind of reed. 

 After Dr Zhang had completed some business with Yin Jia, we went outside to find the cart he had rented. It had two solid-plank wheels, an upside down U-shaped cover of woven bamboo strips and was almost completely filled with wooden boxes and bales of hay. It was attached to a ridiculously small pony driven by an equally tiny man. 

 The abbot gave Licia, Miguel and me old, quilted coats, to add to our disguise, and we stowed our bags on the cart. We squashed onto in the back with the hay while Dr Zhang sat on the front with the driver. 

 'Ah-um,' Dr Zhang said as we set off for the farm, 'just remember don't tell anyone you are from Ja-na-da, Canada won't exist for another fifteen hundred years. And, Licia, don't do any girly things. You are disguised as a boy.'

With the wheel axles squeaking loudly and the unsprung cart lurching and bumping over the paving stones, we set out for Xinye through the crowded streets of Xiangyang. As we approached the city gate, we worried about meeting the guards who had arrested us the day before. But none of them paid any attention to us.

Licia gasped. 'Aiya! What's that horrible stench?'

'The moat,' explained Dr Zhang. 'The water is stagnant and of course the citizens have to dump waste somewhere. It does have the advantage of discouraging idlers.'

The Dragon Well monastery was not far but Dr Zhang spent some time with the abbot completing the elaborate rituals of departure required by Chinese etiquette. So it was late in the morning before we finally set off to meet the Tiger Generals.

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 We crossed the Han river on a flat bottomed ferry propelled by two muscular men with large oars and we jolted over the trail all afternoon. We were soon tired, stiff and bored. Dr Zhang suggested we use Chinese names to avoid confusing the locals.

 'Dr Zhang has a good point,' Licia said. 'My Chinese name is Hu Li-Xia. Ziff, you can be Xia-Dian. Miguel you are Mi-Guo.'

We practised getting the tones right with our new names and afterward Dr Zhang entertained us with something that resembled a small trumpet called a Suona except that it had two reeds in the mouthpiece and no valves. He played lively, high pitched tunes while our driver, Ming Ruo, sang songs until they got tired. Licia said they were ribald and refused to translate.

Not to be out done, Miguel and I sang all the Halloween and Christmas carols we could remember and then Licia broke into a song in waltz time. Miguel and I joined in after the first line.

'Black . . socks . . they ne- ver get dir- ty

the long- er you wear them, the stron- ger they get . . '. . . . . .

'Some . . times . I think I should wash them

 but some thing keeps telling me     no, no, not yet . . '

 Ming Ruo laughed uproariously, when Dr Zhang explained what a sock was. He pulled off one of his woven straw boots to reveal that he wore no socks.