T W E N T Y - T H R E E

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"He's so sweet, Mother!" Aemma said as Joffrey giggled in her lap. Rhaenyra couldn't help but smile at the sweet sight.

"One day, you'll sit there with a babe of your own." Rhaenyra said.

"One day that is far, far, away." Aemma wrinkled her nose. She loved her little brother but could not imagine herself as a mother. Not yet, at least.

"I used to think the same before I met your father." Rhaenyra said with a sad smile.

"Harwin?" Aemma asked.

"Yes. He made me so happy, and it was... easy, with him. He understood my role and my place, and he understood his. I loved your father, Laenor, so much. But we had incompatibilities, and I was not cruel enough to force him to give me children." Rhaenyra's smile fell slightly, as she thought of all the times she and Laenor tried to conceive.

"I know. Father told me about it some. I think it was kind of you to not force him. Harwin gave me life, and I loved him, but Father is my father. He told me I was his one true love. I think he was mine." Aemma held Joffrey closer as tears welled in her eyes. 

"Oh, my Flower." Rhaenyra held Aemma as they both cried. Aemma, because of loss, and Rhaenyra, because of guilt. 

"Why did you marry Daemon?" Aemma asked with a sniffle. That was a question she often asked herself as she lay awake at night.

"I... Long before your father, and long before Harwin, he was my love. After your father, and after Harwin, he still was." Rhaenyra said, as she tried to find the right words.

"Do your miss your mother?" Aemma asked.

"All the time. When I was younger, every time I thought of her, I felt like my heart would break. Over time, the pain gets easier. I learned to remember her with love and fondness, not sadness and grief." Rhaenyra said as she stroked Aemma's hair and gazed at Joffrey, who simply babbled in Aemma's lap.

"I miss him all the time. Every time I close my eyes, all I see is..." Aemma's voice trailed off and she struggled to hold in a sob.

"I know, Flower. I know." Rhaenyra rubbed Aemma's back as her heart broke for her daughter.

"Did you see the portrait Grandmother gave me?" Aemma asked.

"Yes, I still remember sitting for the painter. Your father insisted he held you and Luke." Rhaenyra chuckled to herself as she recalled that day. "Your father wanted Harwin to be painted too, but that was not possible." 

"Father was a very kind man. I hope to be like him, when I'm older. I hope Jace, Luke, and Joffrey are like him too." Aemma said as she gently rocked Joffrey.

"You already are, my sweet girl. You have his heart, and his kindness." Rhaenyra placed a kiss on Aemma's head.

"Only to those deserving." Aemma said.

"Of course." Rhaenyra laughed.

"Mother... about what I said, I'm sorry. I truly did not mean it. I do not know what I would do without you." Aemma said as she leaned into her mother's side.

"Oh, sweet girl. I already forgave you." Rhaenyra rested her head atop her daughter's. "Will you stay for supper?" Rhaenyra asked. Aemma shook her head.

"I think the Queen already tore half the Crownlands apart looking for me." Aemma said with a chuckle. "I should leave soon, before it gets dark." 

"You could always stay the night and return on the morrow." Rhaenyra said. Aemma shook her head and smiled sadly. 

"I think I would be confined to my chambers until the new year. I will visit soon, I promise." Aemma kissed her mother's cheek. 

"Here, take Joffrey. I should say goodbye to Jace and Luke." Aemma handed Joffrey back to her mother, placing a swift kiss on his chubby cheek. She smiled as he giggled.

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