Lonely

Day 4

I feel overwhelmed. It was getting cold, making the fire burn out. I can see smoke from the sky through. Why hasn't no one seen it yet? What is taking so long? The sky was cloudy, and the leaves were turning red. Damn. I looked at the weather by the week saying it will be warm and sunny. The goddamn channel doesn't know what is sunny or not. It was cloudy too. No wonder no one can see the smoke. I can't stay under this rock. Need to find a safer place to sleep in. I carried my backpack to march north.

I guess that I was walking north because of the compass yesterday. At least I hope am walking the north. North is got to be the best place to go. I look over left and right when I was scouting on the hill. Trees were covering up the woods. I can't take the chance of going left or right if I will go the wrong way or on a death trip. North is the only way. I place the pish in a plastic bag, hoping it will stay well when it gets dark again. I can't move fast with my ankle. The stock was falling apart, falling on my arm. I grunt in pain. Feeling that my arm has a scratch. I laid on my back for a moment. Thinking about my past. A few years ago, I used have a small company on foods called burns industries. I made it a success after a while. With Todd helping since he's the one making it happen. Todd is an entrepreneur, called his agents, and made this for me. When I was younger Todd supports me all the time. Meeting first in middle school when people were talking smack at me for being a fat-ass, Todd had my back. In my sophomore year, he had my back again when I was elected as a school president wanting to change the cafeteria lunch. I didn't win but I tried, and Todd was right next to me supporting every way that he can. He was like a brother to me. The best friend I've ever had. Until we got accepted in two different colleges. He asked if we could call other to talk. I felt glad we can talk but sad that we can't see each other for a few years. In my mind, I said "Godammit! I'm going to miss this son of a bitch." He gets to go off to an advantaged college fill with black people and I get a college full of white people. It felt awkward walking being like the dark figure of which I am. Until I meant another black dude by the buildings of how I met Patrick. He introduced me to his friend Brian who is white, with curly hair. He was charming at first, told him by name, and asked if we can sit. I mean, what the hell, right? I got no one to talk to anyway.

He talks about companies he likes to invest in when he finishes college, and so does Brian. He said he wanted to make a company to make shoes. He loves the design of it, especially the Nike sneakers. He shows off his Air Jordan to us, just to be a dick. Cost him 500$ for that. That is how I got interested in making one. Making the designed foods has always been my dream. I love seeing the way it looks and taste so delicious, I start to cook food myself, especially fish since it's my favorite food. When I do suck is looking how the way it looks, I mean I can cook, but I can't look perfection that you can carve in your month. People will see that it was made by a 6-year-old kid who doesn't know how to make a damn meal. Maybe Making a company can help me to conspire it if I can get money. Brian told me about his work being an asset for his business at the Alaska telephone association in Anchorage. He said that I only must phone call trading numbers to people. It was the best opportunity to look at a business before starting it. I accept it and take the job. Years later Todd asked me to visit him at the Starbucks coffee shop by calling me. I said okay. In my head, I wanted to say, "I call you a dozen times and now you want to talk?!" I was pissed at him for not calling. But maybe he has a good reason. I got there on a bus, waiting for him for like 10 minutes until a buff guy was sitting in Todd's sit. I told someone is sitting there. That's when I realized it was Todd.

I mean holy shit. He looks so different than before. He used to have glasses and was slim. He also has short hair but now he has a braid. He has more muscles than Terry Crews. I said to him I didn't recognize him at all. He was a different man now. And me? I'm still the same. Just fatter than before. We talked about how things have been going. I told him about my friend's business and how he can help us build a business. Todd told me he was working as an insert at The Bristol Bay Native. One of the biggest businesses in Alaska. I felt jealous at first, but I can't complete that. I still haven't finished college yet. In my mind, I was like damn, Todd Prescott is a business and by the look of him, he'll be a celebrity at this point. We talk about how we've been. At first, we talked about how the Hawks will beat the Warriors back in the grand finale of 2002. Then I talked about how I'd been doing. I told them I'd been working at a telephone booth for over two years. He gives me a "Not so good" type of look. Look. If that's a real thing. He said to me that he thought of an idea. He'll help me operates a food design business for me if I told my associates to give ads to the telephone company. He said he can give them a message around the world about Bristol Bay about their foods, being delivered in point bay in a few days by your house. He said to give it much time as it needs. This will be a new career for me. We go outside, shaking our goodbyes, and are left by our cars. This will be great I thought. It changes everything for me. I had to leave college for this to happen. I told Brian and Patrick about it. They were on board with it. Patrick wanted to work with me to make this happen and it did. It took a few years just to make the building, permits, design, and most importantly what it is. I always wanted to make foods that look like art and to eat them like heaven. I decide to call it the burns industry because my name makes sense thinking that the foods are cooked well and burn like a grill. I thought of making seafood because I was obsessed with seafood. When I was younger, I ate a chunk of fish and crabs at an eating competition, of about 2 dozen of them. After that, I throw up when I left the stage. Now I know not to take a competition again. The delivery I took over by the street was the worst and now I mention myself not to think about it. But that doesn't stop me from eating them. I Love them and making a company of my creation is my biggest achievement. I what I think was right and took the deal Todd gave me. By then all I had to do is wait it out, but not really. It took a long time for me to make a business plan, what structure it was built, make a logo, and even set out what location it should be at. I figured it should be in the best place in Anchorage, right in Chugach state park. There are a lot of million things I must work on to make this happen. I gave up my whole college fund for this. Like damn it was hell but at the end of the day, I did it. I made a company myself. With my "partners" of course. When good luck started, all that shit just went away. Not really, though. I still own and work there but not full-time. I am getting tired of just writing this. Save it for next time, I guess.

I was walking for nearly hours, I don't know. I lost time here when I climbed up a tall hill earlier. A bunch of branches was in my face when I walked down. Think were twigs in my jacket. My shoe got mudding just by crossing over a small river. I don't think I can keep up. I am starting to kneel on the ground. That was when I saw it. Ashes of a cigarette. It was still burned. Someone was here. I was starting to build up hope. I pick up the cigarette and ran. I shouted, hoping someone will hear me. I even said I found your cigarette five times Like a maniac. I went to the highest ground I can find but it was only like 20 feet or something. I waited for someone to call back but nothing. What the hell am I doing? I'm acting like by bystander from a horror movie. This was probably burned days ago. I screamed in rage. Throwing the cigarette on the ground, stomped it, and walked. I needed to shelter or something anything that can keep me warm. It was dark and cold. I was freezing my ass up in this hellhole. I was getting tired. Didn't get any sleep last night from that owl noise. I started in sit down by a tree. Looking around ad it was fogged. Couldn't see a damn thing. My hand is hurting me just by writing this. I cover myself in my backpack, the only thing keeping me warm. I kept if something was going to attack me like a bear or any wild animal. I tried to get that get out of my head. Need to focus on it now. I was getting hungry. I don't know if I can do this. I don't know if someone is rescuing me. I think they forgot about me. I can't do this. I just can't. Oh god, please someone help me. I don't wanna die in this cold.