Day 50: The Mall

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Dear Diary....

Nancy woke me up with the smell of something delicious. My stomach rumbled and I wondered what the sound would be like, would it be similar to the noises Eddie makes when you kiss him. Your desire for whatever was out there cooking could be equally as intense as the desire you have for your lips to be on Eddie's.

I started to think I needed to get some reference material, waiting for Eddie to show me what I was missing, what I was going to be exposed to left me feeling like a victim, someone that needed help, I wasn't handicapped when it came to the rest of my body. I wondered if this was something I should talk to Nancy about or if I should ask Will, can girls talk to boys about other boys?

When you rounded the corner your question was already answered, Will was there waiting at the table, a huge smile when he saw you.

"Sarah!" He signed excitedly, "I am going with you

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"Sarah!" He signed excitedly, "I am going with you."

Nancy must have been working with him as his hands were better than just a few days before. You smiled and nodded, "What smells good?"

"Pancakes." Will signed back. He also was paying attention to your signing, you didn't know how to mouth all the words yet, so it was hard to convey your own words.

You walk over to him and give him a warm hug, he wraps his arms around you firmly. As you pull away he pats the seat next to him, Nancy had brought in a few stools to line up against the kitchen island. It would do for now she had said, she wanted a real table and real furniture, but wanted me to help pick them out.

I was worried, I had an allowance from my parents and a moderate savings balance that appeared once my grandmother had heard what happened. The account was set up in my name only and it was strange to have my own money.

Nancy smiled as she threw a small towel on her shoulder, I noticed the paper plates and looked at her, "No plates?"

"Nope.... they took those to... I was wondering what you were actually eating, but realized it was school food then take out?"

Nancy watched as you blushed and nodded in embarrassment. She smiled sweetly and then looked over to Will, I watched her speak as she signed so he caught the majority of the conversation. He just shook his head, "It's okay Sarah."

"Once you are done eating, the three of us are going shopping, I made a list by location, but just of items we need, I want you to pick them out." Nancy smiled wider, "With the exception of my room's sheets and my towels, a girl's got to have some flare."

This was meant as a way to show you that you had an opinion, but the idea of picking out anything made her anxious. I twisted my hands together and Will saw them, he reached over placing a hand on mine. He didn't say anything just smiled and nodded at me. For a kid he had this amazing power to calm, it was like he didn't need to speak.

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