apocalypse | 18+

4.

escaping to the wilderness

this is the day i realized
he was a cool weirdo
at least
he wasn't a killer
'dunno, i like to scare them with the thought that maybe i am the killer instead

i drink tea
he drank vodka instead

i shrugged, we are who we are i guess

he brought me chocolate and vanilla mix
he opened my door again
i made a disgusted face
what the fuck is wrong with this kid?

i turned my disgust to laugh and making fun
still i laughed with

we escaped into the wilderness
he didn't kill me
and i didn't kill him

it's cool to not be dead
i made it this far
i told him about a safe place i used to go to
where all the rich people lived

they had abandoned all of their homes by then
the world was ending
we escaped to the suburban wilderness

he bought me chocolate and vanilla again
i kept laughing
he fell for it

why pay attention to the person
who only wants to study strangers for this
this is what i enjoy

learning about someone's lies and lives
the fallacies they sell
every true lie they bask in
i don't care if anything he says is the truth
we're just chillin in the woods anyways

peeing on sticks
listening to the river
wondering what the plan is

there aren't screams in the woods
we escaped them

we walked and talked like we were tumblr teenage kids
i tried to find the big dipper
failed

i touched the tree where i used to smoke weed with my friends
and now they're probably all dead

well, we all have to die in the end

we approached the end of the trees
and i suggested we go back again
i heard a bumping beat of music
people were partying on a tuesday night
amidst of the apocalypse

we laughed in confusion
i think we laughed with

we walked back through the woods
we breathed the air a lot
in the wilderness you couldn't smell the burning city
or the mass amount of gas being dumped all over it

just trees and mulch
maybe a little bit of some dead dogs shit

it was cool anyways
everything has to end

i stood to walk back to our cars

we weren't in the city
this was the first time he suggested that we burn them
while we sit
he said he liked them sound of it

"but at least we're warm." he mocked me in my voice. to that, i made a straight face. fuck him.

i looked at him like he was crazy
i said no
he said it's comfortable to fall asleep in

imagine

i did

but we sat in the flameless car
he drank the vodka again

he showed me the secrets he hid
i showed him scars i did

we talked about our lives and shared so many old pictures and videos

it was sad to realize
they were all the past

for a moment i saw sadness in his eyes
instead of feeling it
we went for a drive

we drove through the flames
i showed him places where i made destruction to beauty

he seemed annoyed by this
that i was too smart to be reckless like him

though this is the same kid
who suggested we sleep in the burning car
in which the flame that he lit

nope, nopeity nope
i only wanted to survive
but he just wanted to live

this is the beginning of the end.