A lot of people say that I live in my own fantasy world, but I can't say that I mind.
Have you seen the state of the real world?
That shit is making everybody depressed.
I exist inside my head because whenever I step outside of it, I'm hit with the terrifying realisation that being alive sucks.
Everybody's always sad or tired or disappointed.
They plaster on smiles, but it never reaches their eyes.
They tell jokes where their own sadness is the punchline.
It's so normalised to be miserable that people get concerned when they see you enjoying yourself.
When I go outside and dance in the rain people ask me if I'm drunk.
When I stick my head out the car window and scream into the wind, I'm called crazy.
I take the time to make sure I'm really enjoying myself and I'm overthinking.
I'm out of touch with the real world, I need a reality check. Life isn't always fair, Sometimes you just have to do shit that makes you miserable.
I ask you, why?
Can you give me a solid reason?
You tell me it's how you make money. It's how you survive. You keep people in your life that you hate because it's easier. You stay on the same path because it's steady. Your eyes are so empty and I wonder why you want me to be the same.
I spent so long just trying to survive my own mind. Why do I have to exchange one torture for another to be able to call myself 'well'
If this is what being crazy feels like, then so be it.
Taking the time to enjoy myself, feeling confident in my own skin, letting myself be misunderstood.
I don't think I need to explain myself.
The world doesn't owe me shit, but I owe it to myself to find a happiness that lasts.
I haven't quite found it yet, but I know that this isn't it.
YOU ARE READING
The diary of Seth Alexander
Não Ficçãoas the title suggests, this is legit going to be my diary. and yes, most diaries are supposed to be secret, but I have always been an open book. I like to pretend to be mysterious, but the people around me will all tell you that I am am someone who...
