The Past Comes Back

"i want to be yours"

Y/n's POV

The next day, Sebastian seemed to be making great recovery progress. We spoke nothing of yesterday. We hadn't had another argument, it was just mutually agreed without any words said. I was still staying at the Moriarty's, but I slept in the guest room once I was positive Moran was healthy again. 

I woke up that morning and I freshened up before going to Sebastian's room. I gently knocked on the door and waited for the door to open. I listened to his slow footsteps approaching the door before it opened. It slowly opened and he looked down at me. Still wearing his night clothes and with messy hair. 

"Y/n...did you need something? Do you need to do a checkup before breakfast?" he asked. "Actually, there is no need for any more checkups, I wanted to have a talk with you after we have breakfast" I explained to him. 

Sebastian scratched his head and looked at me, deep in thought. Although my face was pretty expressionless, I was nervous awaiting a response. The past few days have been...much and I really could not blame Moran if he said no. I went from avoiding him, to yelling at him for abandoning me, to crying over his near death experience, to kissing him and then acting like it was nothing the day right after. 

"I would like that at lot, shall we go on a stroll afterwards?" he asked me. "Just like we did when we were younger?" I asked him. "Just like that" he replied.

I turned away and went downstairs for breakfast. I heard his bedroom door close. I boiled some water and prepared my tea. I poured the water into a teacup and added my honey and waited for the tea to cool down. I went upstairs and offered tea to everyone. After another five minutes, we all had breakfast together. It was quiet, but not silent. Not a single word came out of neither mine or Sebastian's mouth, but everyone else spoke. When everyone was done, I helped Jack clean up. 

"Still giving everyone the silent treatment?" he poked my cheek. "No...I have just been deep in thought. How am I going to explain everything when I get back to work?" I asked Jack while stacking some plates. "How about you just stop stressing and take your mind off of things. You work way too hard and you truly deserve a break" Jack suggested.

I stopped and thought a little more...he was right, I never stopped for anything and that's the one thing that I needed to do right now. 

"I'm planning to go out with Moran today and have a talk with him" I blurted out. "You still address him as Moran although you have known him for years" Jack brought that up. "I know...but I'm not ready for 'Sebastian' yet" I explained to him. "Fair enough, just go easy on yourself...be a little selfish" Jack said as he finished washing the dishes. 

I went back up to my room and got ready for my stroll with Sebastian. Right as I picked up my bag, I heard a knock on the door. I walked over and opened it. 

"Are you ready?" Moran asked me. "I am" I replied to him. "Shall we go?" he asked. "We shall" I said. 

Our conversation was still very short, but it was better than my hostility and his desperation. We walked out the door together and decided to walk through the city instead of taking a carriage. We walked adjacent to each other and didn't say much. The weather was really nice, but it was not enough to lighten the mood. 

"...your hair looks really nice like that" Moran complimented my short hair. "Thank you" I replied. "You know that it is my first time seeing your hair down in years right" he reminded me. 

He was right, my hair was always tied up and I had cut it to my  shoulders. 

"We really need to catch up" Sebastian said to me. "I missed you so much...I could never put into words how much I yearned for your return" I said to him. "I'm sorry for leaving you" Moran apologized. "I accept that part...but why did you become a womanizer? Why did you sleep around with other women?" I asked...nervous for the reply. "...I really don't know why, but I regret it Y/n. I want to be better! I want to be yours Y/n" Sebastian looked into my eyes when he said that. 

It caught me so off guard...I always wanted that and I didn't know that there would be a day when he said those words. Sebastian held onto my hands. 

"Y/n please...that's all I ever wanted" he had a saddened look, expecting to get rejected. "Seb, you don't understand how long I wanted you to be mine, I still want you to be, but I don't want to constantly be chasing after you. I want you to stay...please be at my side" I was desperate. 

Sebastian's hand rested on my cheek. 

"I won't leave you again I promise" he said. "Don't just promise, show me you'll stay!" I was still as feisty as I was all those years ago. "Let me into your heart and I'll stay" Sebastian said before pulling me closer to him. 

He would have kissed me if I didn't get flustered and hid my face in his shoulder. 

"I never knew you got shy" Sebastian made fun of me. "Guess you learn something new every day" I replied to him. "You really wanna do this?" Sebastian asked. "Of course I do" I replied to him. "Wanna get out of here?" he asked. "Sure" I replied, grabbing onto his hand. 

We walked home together and as I was walking up the stairs to my bedroom, Sebastian did something unexpected. He grabbed me by the waist and pulled me into his room. 

"Seb, we can't do this, we're not kids anymore" I explained to him, my back pressed against the door. "We're the only ones here" he said to me. "Fine" I succumbed to the situation. 

He put his lips on mine and I put my hand on the back of his head. My face was heating up and his kisses soon went down to my neck. 

"I should spend the night here" I said to him. "You should" he agreed with me.