Getaway

006

Athena

I have been thinking about the Harry situation over and over again for the past day. I couldn't concentrate on anything. Like for example this morning; I was preparing breakfast for grumpy and I, cutting a slice of cheese when suddenly I started thinking about everything. In a moment  grumpy started to bark really loud and that's when I realized that I almost cut myself.

Idiot.

"Ugh, how stupid can I be?" I asked to myself, looking directly at the knife. I really need to start focusing on the things that I do, and order my thoughts. 

I moved my whole body towards a kitchen cabinet, and grabbed a towel to soak it a bit and then pass it over my face. Just to try to be able to forget.

Just for a second.

Grumpy moved his body towards my direction, and put his head in between my thighs just to start licking it.

"Gosh, stop it!"

I tried to move him, but he made it impossible.

And this is where it takes us right now; in the couch. Me petting his head, and he licking my stomach. I know he is trying to make me feel better; I can tell, by his actions. I must admit that this is making me feel a little better, and that cheers me up.

My phone vibrates, indicating that a message has arrived.

Melany: Hey, just wanted go let you know that later we will pay you a visit.

Great. I mean, don't get me wrong. I really love to hang out with my friends, but with the whole family situation, its kinda hard. I try to put my insecurities aside and act with maturity, and answer her right.

Me: Great! I'm so exited to see you all! And I have to show you the pet that I got. You will love him!

Melany: Ohh, really?! That's so exiting. So tell me about him? Is he adorable?

Me: The moment that I saw him, I instantly knew he was the one. I don't know how, but I got a very new feeling. And, he is perfect. He have all his fur black; like the night. And his eyes, oh, let me tell you, they are the deppliest blue I have ever seen. And also he is very affectionate towards me. Everytime he can, he tries to touch me his his wet nose or his paws. And I find that so adorable!

I smile to myself, remembering the first day, place and time we looked into each others eyes. The feeling I could count on him with everything. Even if its a dog.

Melany: It sounds like you have taken a lot of affection towards him in a very short time. I am very happy for you. You really deserve the world, you know?

I smiled while shaking my head. I really don't think that.

Me: I will see you later

Grumpy sees my movement of head, so he turns his head to the side, like asking me what's wrong.

I smile at him.

"Nothing's wrong. Just that my friends will come over later"

What I don't expect is to hear him growl, and in a very fast movement puts himself all around my body. I can notice him being tense, so I move my hands towards   the back of his ears. He whimpers at that.

"Hey, its okey. They're just friends"

I don't know what is happening, but suddenly I feel in every inch of my body, in every vein; sadness. As if it consumed me. In all the possible ways.

I try to stop feeling this, but its kinda impossible. I try to put my mind in happy moments of my life. Just to try, and take it away.

But no.

It stays.

What exactly was that? It is because of Harry? Of overthinking of him?

Maybe it will keep  breaking me, even if he isn't here anymore.

***

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