Faithless

Chapter 10

A month passed since Hannah's death and memorial. I didn't go to the memorial, despite Dahlia encouraging me to. I wouldn't have been able to handle thinking about her any longer, and it was time to move on. I stopped going to therapy completely. There wasn't anything he'd be able to do anyway. So I called Dr. Kelley's office and canceled all the upcoming appointments. I made up some story for Dahlia that Dr. Kelley said that I didn't need to go to therapy anymore and my prescription was over with. It was the only time I felt bad for lying to her, for she seemed to be so excited that I was "doing better".

I didn't talk to Hannah's friends anymore, and they didn't talk to me. Lucas was the only one who checked in occasionally, but I was sure he was only being polite. I didn't mind either way, though. I had Avery. We spent more time together, and she was a welcoming distraction to having the crows following me everywhere. For once, it felt nice to be around someone who was genuinely interested in me and spending time with me.

No progress was made on the investigation into finding Hannah's murderer. Darren was frustrated about this. I knew this because he ranted about it every time he beat me up in the school bathrooms. Krieth encouraged me to fight back, but I knew it would be a bad idea. Even if I did have the upper hand, beating up Darren, effectively embarrassing him, would really upset the balance of my place in the school, which was not something I was interested in doing. I was comfortable in my unnoticeable corner where people only looked at me in passing and occasionally whispered about my weird demeanor.

So things slowed down. I felt like I was still normal. Things felt better than they were. And when I wasn't watching Krieth, I almost forgot about what had happened. Anyone would know that wouldn't last for long, though.

It was the morning of December 11th when I was thinking about this, lying in bed staring at my unmoving ceiling fan. I was starting to feel hungry again. Krieth was watching me with that same old stare, as he knew what I was realizing. It was clear that he could feel it too.

I turned my head to look at him. "So who are we gonna eat?"

"That's up to you."

"You chose last time."

"That was only because you didn't know what you were doing. I just gave you a little nudge."

"If anything, I'd rather you just make me sleepwalk again. That was way easier."

Krieth leaned forward slightly. "I could if you want to."

I shook my head. "No, I'm not being serious, I just..." I sighed, sitting up. "I wish it didn't have to be like this."

Krieth stared at me for another moment in extended silence before looking over at my closet. "You should get up now. You'll be late for school."

"You're right." I climbed out of bed and stretched my aching bones. "Since when did you start caring about my schedule?"

"I don't understand why you continue to wear that skin, or even why you continue to follow a human regime. But this is what you are doing, so it's what I must put up with."

I changed into my uniform in the mirror, looking at Krieth in the reflection. "Are you saying that I can exit my skin? Like literally? Like take it off?"

"Of course you can. Though I can already tell you wouldn't quite like that."

I turned around. "So what would I see if I took it off?"

"Your true self."

Again with the vague answers. I figured I was better off not asking Krieth for anything else. It was obvious that he wanted me to figure everything out on my own anyway, so why not do exactly that?