Unexpected Events

-forget 5.13-

TW: vomiting

A party. An actual fucking party where people go to drink. This place just feels so surreal and it's starting to make me uncomfortable in the fact that I haven't found a single problem with the place yet.

This place even has jobs and school. A small shitty school that I haven't even attended yet, but they have Rick and Michonne as police officers. How cool is that?

I would much rather be assigned a job than going to school. I'm young and I know that but I also know too much to go right back to where I was.

"Hey, you coming with to the party?" Carl asked. We had a shared room with bunk beds, we fought over who got top bunk but he was more mature than me and caved in.

"Maybe." I said as I sat up, dangling my feet over the edge of my bed.

"You should, a lot of people are gonna be there." He said as I jumped down, making the floor rattle. "You could maybe try to be friends with Ron and the others." He suggested.

Carl had been trying very hard to convince me to hangout with him and the others, but the "others" are really a bunch of stuck up kids who haven't seen a single thing that's happened outside of these walls. They don't get it. It's unfair.

"I'd end up making one of them cry. It's better I don't even try." I said nonchalantly, going over to the dresser. Ron's mom Jesse was actually really nice though. Since I've spent most of my time at the house I've normally been here whenever she drops stuff off for us. She even gave me a haircut which was nice because I couldn't stand how long it was getting. She would bring over clothes and stuff for Judith mainly, every time she'd ask if there was anything she could get for me.

"I'll go to the stupid party if that's what you really want." I said after Carl looked seemingly sad. I pulled out a grey long sleeve. Carl didn't get the hint to leave. "You just gonna stand there...?" I asked, hands at the hem of my t-shirt was currently wearing.

"Oh- right sorry." Carl's face was deep red by the time he left which left me with a small chuckle before getting dressed and throwing on my over worn black zip up.

——

Fuck that stupid party. Ron and his stupid friends showed up right as I had gone to the bathroom. When I had returned they were all having a obvious better time without me. Carl was laughing and actually enjoying himself.

Instead of staying and going by someone else like a normal person, I stole a bottle of something. I had never drank anything besides beer before and it was too dark to read what it was. All I knew was this shit was strong.

I hid the bottle back into my jacket so nobody would see it.

Was I overreacting? Probably. Was I being overly sensitive and dramatic? Yeah. But I couldn't control it, neither could my dad apparently.

Shane. Not dad. Fathers aren't supposed to be like that. You aren't supposed to fear being remotely like your dad. Plus I wasn't technically related to him. I could call him whatever I wanted.

Deep down I knew this was something he'd do. Sneaking off with a stolen bottle of alcohol.

I sat on the porch. Everyone was gone or at the other house.

God I felt terrible. Carl had every right to do whatever he wanted. If he wanted other friends then there was no place for me to stop him just because I have a stupid crush on him.

I honestly just needed to find some type of purpose for me around here. Whether it was hunting with Daryl or gardening with Maggie, or maybe even baking with Carol, I needed to find something.

That was what I liked about the outside. No matter what you had a purpose. In here it was just like old world, bringing me back those problems that leave you when your out in the world.

"Hey, you okay?" A guy asked, I recognized the voice.

"Yeah," I said trying to hide the bottle behind the chair, but I ended up just dropping it, making most spill out. I didn't bother to pick it up, instead going to the stairs where Ron had now walked over to.

Ron definitely could tell I was drunk. I could barely stand up straight. "We were looking for you at the party, Carl thought you might be here."

"Mhm." I said nodding my head, even though the only thing really holding it up right now was the post. "So he sent you... and why couldn't he do this himself?"

"I volunteered." Ron said. "But by the looks of it you aren't gonna even make it down the stairs."

"I can walk, but I don't think anyone would be too impressed to see me." I said, a drunken smile on my lips for whatever reason. I was extremely tired. "I'm gonna go inside." I said, my eyes already half closed.

I don't even remember much after that, just that now I was half awake throwing up into the toilet. I was just sitting on the floor. Fourteen and I was so drunk I couldn't even lift my head off the toilet without throwing up.

It had to have been at least a couple hours since I was outside, but I honestly had no clue.

After finishing throwing up yet again, I used the short period of time I wasn't vomiting to take off my sweatshirt since I was sweaty.

Suddenly the bathroom light turned on because yes, I was throwing up it the dark, which was a good thing because the light hurt my eyes badly.

"Turn it off." I grouched, squinting to see who came in. It was Maggie.

"What the hell did you do?" She asked crouching next to me. She sounded more worried than angry, but she was definitely both.

Of course, before I could answer my head was back in the toilet as she rubbed my back.

"Jesus." She commented right as I stopped. "You know what, we'll talk in the morning. I'll help you to the couch." She told me as she handed me toilet paper to wipe my mouth.

——

My head was pounding about ten times worse than the previous night. Maybe I shouldn't have drank so much my first time.

And now I had to have a talk with Maggie, which would get Glenn involved, and somehow lead to me getting scolded at the dinner table by ten adults.

"Your awake." Carl commented. I turned my head to see him sitting in the chair. He was watching me sleep. "Maggie said to give you advil when you woke up." He threw me the bottle which I failed to catch. I felt like I was in a delay, this sucked.

"Thanks..." I drowsily replied, taking two and swallowing them, no water needed.

"Why'd you leave the party and get so drunk?" He questioned.

That was something I couldn't answer. The only reason was that I'm jealous over nothing.
"Why'd you send Ron after me?" I countered.

Carl just stared at me for a second, like he was trying to find an answer. "He wants to be friends with you. He's trying..."

"He does not want to be friends with me." I chuckled, sitting up and then immediately regretting it.

"All I'm asking is you give him one chance. He said he helped you last night after you passed out on the porch." Carl said.

Ron helped me inside? Even like that?

I waited a second like I had to decide. "Fine, but only because you asked." The last part slipped out- my cheeks turning pink immediately.

"I'll have to ask more often then." Carl said with a smile before he left.

I couldn't tell if I was thankful or not to be alone in the house. My head hurt and it was good that nobody was home to scold me for my actions previously, but I also enjoyed talking to Carl, but I also was not being smart about what I said to him. I don't need to have him be scared by my feelings toward him. That'd be the worst way I could lose him.

With the silent house and my non existing patience for the advil to kick in, I fell back asleep, which was something I definitely needed.

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