Two Summers Ago, the World Went to Shit

Chapter 3: Stranger Things Haven't Happened

Chapter 3: Stranger Things Haven't Happened

For a couple of weeks everything was fine and dandy at my brother's house, even with Jackson here with us. Jackson and I didn't really talk unless we had to, and I avoided him like the plague most of the time to save myself from any more embarrassment. It was awkward between us now since we'd hit that wall that night. I thought about it a lot more than I should've, but it was difficult for me, even after some time passed. I don't think he'd said anything to Caleb, and I didn't think I could talk to him about it because if it affected their friendship in any way, I would feel terrible. There was a reason he never wanted me to date his friends when we were in school, and that's because I ruined everything I touched. I really hope I didn't ruin this for him.

Caleb knew something was up; he always did. He hadn't spoken on it because Jackson was doing a great job of acting perfectly normal, as if nothing had transpired between us. I'm sure to Caleb it just looked like I was avoiding everyone or homesick or something—I don't know. It looked one sided for sure.

I'd become very close with the four walls of my bedroom. I was getting stir crazy. I craved human interaction, but I wasn't going to get that here unless I accepted that Jackson would be a part of it. Distancing myself the last couple of weeks took a toll on me. I went through a patch of lows, but now I was feeling a high creeping up on me. I had some self-confidence for the first time in a while, and I was determined to make the most of it.

So, tonight I decided I was going to go out. I was tired of being cooped up in this house, and I wanted to go do something... maybe someone. I was feeling reckless which was a trend for when I was on a high. I was like this from time to time; I think the doctor called it a "manic episode," but that's a bit dramatic if you ask me.

These episodes typically lasted about four days, but half of the time I couldn't tell anything was different. The manic episodes I got were like a switch flip within my personality, mood, and decisions. It wasn't a gradual difference in who I was; it was very evident to everyone except me. I was just blind to it because that's how the disorder typically affected me. After the episodes were over though, guilt would hit me like a freight train—always.

Everyone could tell something was going on when I was off my medication, but I was often unaware of the choices I was making until it was too late. At this point, I'd been on this euphoric high for about three days already, so I wanted to keep up the feeling and do something that'd be problematic and exciting. It was kind of like day-drinking to keep the buzz or prolong the effects of a lasting hangover. It was exhilarating to act on these temptations and feelings.

I began to get ready to go out. I wore my hair down after fixing it and put on light makeup. I threw on a short, black mini dress with a pair of feathery heels to go out to a nightclub towards the city that I looked up a few hours earlier. I looked into the full-length mirror in the corner of the room, straightening the dress out with my hands. I felt very scandalous and sexy in this outfit, and my confidence was sky high.

I snatched my keys from the dresser and headed out towards my car. My heels clanked the tile floor loudly as I approached the island in the kitchen. Caleb and Jackson were sitting on the couch, and they both turned around to see what I was doing. I reached for my purse that was on the left side of the island. I was smiling from ear to ear as I went out into the cool breeze not saying anything to the two of them before I left. It was enough to catch the attention of Caleb who quickly hurried after me.

I walked out of the open garage door towards my car.

"Sammi, where are you going," he asked with concern in his voice.

"Out," I said giggling.

"Out where?"

"Oh my god Caleb, relax. I'm going to the Poplar Pub Point," I said pressing the unlock bottom on my key fob as the lights on my car blinked.