Trapped in a circle

The end

AN: I didn't want to put it at the end this time as this chapter already is an of some kind. The hiatus was long, I know, but it was even longer than I had planned because when I was finally ready to start writing again, my computer broke and never started again. Some problem with cooling system because of its age. And so I still have no computer and it's a pain to write in phone. Autocorrect keeps on being a disturbance.

Also, I have no idea how to finish this, sorry. This is the best I could come up with and as I didn't really like it, I decided to put the story on hiatus so I could think of something better. Well, as it turned out, it didn't work and I'm still stuck with this crappy ending what hardly pulls anything together and explains what was left as questions without answers in the previous chapters. So, if any big questions arise, please write to me and if I can, I'll try to answer them. That's the best I can do for this story and its readers.

***

I still remember how I first met him. He appeared in my kitchen, saying he's from the future and needs me to save him in the past. Long story short, his talk was weird but made sense. But he looked sad. Even started crying after some time, telling me how happy he is to see me again. I couldn't understand that part of his talk and he didn't explain. Said it didn't matter. Turned out this part he didn't tell me was important.

Anyways, I went and picked him up from the 1871. He was a mess at that time, I tried nursing him. It was a success. So when he was ready, he started planning. For revenge. Some bad plans and good ones also, like always, but no matter what he thought of  we were sure to succeed.

But like it turned out, it didn't matter how prepared we were or how many men we bought, we couldn't win that fight. I got shot. Badly. I was sure to die and I didn't want him to see that. I sent him away to another time, sure he'll meet my mom. She had written about it in her diary.

I knew it won't be easy for him, something will go wrong and my mom won't see him again, but I hoped. Hoped that he will find a way out of this dead circle we had created and be happy. That was my wish, I was selfish. I didn't care about what he had to go through to achieve that.

It's been five minutes since I sent him away. I'm still dying, why must it take so long?

"Ay!" I hear a familiar scream. How? Didn't I send him away?

He runs towards me shouting my name. I think it's this version of him who has already met my mom.

"It's fine now. I'm going to save all of you." He promises me.

"Don't give out promises you can't keep." I just warn him. I don't have any strength to smile. He looks fine. That's good.

"This time it's not an empty promise." He tells me, but I don't hear anything anymore. I lose consciousness.

***

I'm still alive. He really kept his promise and now he's sitting next to me, looking so fragile. I want to hug him, tell him to stop. He shouldn't be doing things like that. Fighting battles for others.

"Hey, you're up. How are you feeling?"

"Alive."

"That's good. I'm going to kill him."

"Like you tried this time? I can't save you again."

"It's different. I changed history, this time I won't fail."

"I don't believe you Five. Diary tells me something went wrong."

He seems hesitant but finally whispers to me like he's fearing that something terrible may happen if he says it out loud for the whole world to know.

"I'm not going to stay here after killing Monocle."

"Why?" I can't understand what he's thinking.

"For you Ay. Your birth will never happen if I stay. Your mom won't meet your dad because of me."

"But you were happy! I don't care if I won't be there. Won't even know it. And working with you won't almost kill me, so please. I'm begging you, stay there."

"I can't." He shakes his head and second later, he's gone again. Gone for the kill. Now I know, it'll be alright but where is he? If he's not in his present, not in the past and not in the future, where is he?

***

As far as my knowledge goes, he's not on this planet anymore. Maybe on the moon, but I'm not sure. Reginald was brutally killed in the past but no other bodies were found so he didn't perish there. Did he find a way out of here then? Into another world where everything is different and people are happy?

I don't know. I'm still hoping to meet him again. Just like my mom before me.

I didn't need it. Really. I had no need for this life as it was made possible with such price. Where are you Five? It's time to come home. Please, come back.

***

In a unknown place, in time what doesn't exist, young boy sat down, writing a letter. He was smiling, this time without any tears and there wasn't any sign of insanity in his eyes. He could tell people if he were to ever meet any other than himself, that he was doing quite fine. And letter, when finally but into the worn envelope, was addressed to Ay.