Without You (Steddie)

Chapter 6

A/N; I am sorry for the abandonment. I am finishing this up, only 1-2 chapters left. I might even get it finished today. We will see. 

TW; suicidal ideation, mentions of drug issues, mentions of death, and the usual kind of upside-down trauma you're expecting. 

Waking up on Dustin's couch is weird.

The house always smells of coffee in the mornings. Tews curled up at my side or tucked behind my legs. Quiet humming from Claudia Henderson passing through into the living room as she gets ready for work.

I've always been the person to wake up first. And now with forced sobriety, old habits die hard. It can't be later than 7:30 AM.

I pull myself up, and wander through the kitchen to go to the back patio to smoke. "Morning, sweetie. Coffees ready if you want some."

"Thanks Ms. H." Sleepily I sit down on the porch and light a cigarette.

"I miss smoking."

"Jesus Christ Eddie! You have to warn a guy."

"Sorry. Kinda hard to when you can't... see me, man."

"I feel crazy just sitting here talking to myself. If Dustin's mom sees me out here talking to myself she's-"

"She's what, Steve? You think she doesn't already worry you're losing your mind? You're staying here because you nearly killed yourself."

"I guess that's fair." I take a long drag letting the smoke flow out of my nose.

He's right.

"Do you think it'll be... better? If I can come back?"

"Better? What would be better?"

"I dunno. Like... I guess. Everything? Wouldn't it be easier if I just. Disappeared? Let you all mourn me proper."

"No. You saw me. I can't... I can't do this shit without you Eddie."

"That's why I tried to leave you alone but you kept... doing reckless shit. I couldn't just... Let you continue. I'm sorry I didn't talk to you more. I'm sorry for trying to leave you alone. I didn't... intend on hurting you... Fuck Steve I'm just- sorry."

"Don't be. I chose to keep pushing. I chose to seek you out in stupid ways. I chose the isolation. You didn't do anything wrong."

"I did though. I chose to cut the rope and run back out to those bats. I could've just run away. But the bats would have gotten through. They could've killed Dustin and I couldn't let that happen. I just. I couldn't."

"I know you meant well. I know you tried to save him. I would've done the same thing."

The back door opens, and shuts and Dustin plops down next to me. "So El just walkied, she wanted me to let you know that she's going to try to bring Eddie closer to his body." 

"What if- What if that doesn't work, Dustin?" 

"Then we'll find another way." 

"That doesn't seem like a good idea... If Vecna has control. Someone's going to get themselves killed if you get anywhere near my body." 

I nod. If someone's going to get hurt doing this, it's going to be me. Self destructive behavior be damned, no one else is going to go through with this besides me. It has to be me. "Do you think she can do it?" 

"She's... not sure if it'll work. But she's going to try."

"She doesn't need to get hurt, if there's any danger at all, if Henry...One...Vecna... whatever. If he has control of Eddie's body she needs to get the fuck out of there as fast as possible and we'll regroup. Find another plan."