Us Against the World

18. A New Job

"What did you do to my brother?" 

"What?" I'm struggling with the seatbelt, trying to get the buckle into the clasp. Aceline's question (or rather, her accusation) takes me off guard so rapidly that I lose control of the belt and the metal clip flies into my face, smacking against my nose. "Ouch!"

"Sorry." Aceline blushes and hastily helps me strap the belt. "I should've waited until you were ready." She flicks her sunglasses over her eyes and revs the engine of the Mercedes. 

"It's fine." I rub my nose, crossing my eyes to see if I'm anywhere close to looking like Rudolph. "What did you ask before?"

"What did you do to Ezra?" Aceline laughs. "I've never seen that guy zone out in my life, but yesterday he could hardly pay attention at work, much less at home. I swear Felix was ready to beat his ass when Ezra wasn't listening to him." She pauses. "Then again, Felix can be boring at times."

"I...I don't know." My neck grows hot. "Did he say anything?"

"Not really. Ezra prefers to keep his private affairs to himself. His face told me all that I needed to know, though." She pushes her shades up on her face and stops at the next light. "Did you enjoy it?"

"I did," I reply, gazing at the bustling streets around us and tucking the bottom half of my face in my sweater. With the holidays fast approaching, more and more people have been going out to buy gifts and prepare. Through the clear windows, I can see parents hurrying in and out of toy shops and families laughing as they buy hot chocolate and sweets from the food stands that are tactfully placed in front of popular shopping spots. 

"Riya mentioned to me that you haven't been on a date in a while?" Aceline continues to try and keep the string of small talk going. "Was it any different? Well, I mean, in terms of feelings? I know Ezra can be quite extravagant..."

"I'm not sure." I turn away from the window and place my hand above the air vent, soaking up the warmth in my icy palms. "My brain is like a computer. If I don't need the information anymore, then I delete it. It's probably floating somewhere in my mind, but I don't have the desire to go searching for it." My cold attitude is uncalled for, and my mind scolds me for behaving like a moody child, but I can't help venting some frustration into my words, especially when Aceline is very inviting. She doesn't deserve it, I know, but damn it, I'm allowed to be petty sometimes!

...Now I see how Chandini and I are related. 

Aceline goes quiet. She veers her head toward the front window and her hands tighten on the steering while. Deafening silence strangles us until I'm unable to take it anymore. The ringing...it's like the ringing of a monitor...a life alarm...

"I'm sorry." I stare at my hands, counting the crevices in my palm. "I didn't mean to be rude. I just...I don't like to remember those parts of my life..." Tentatively, I peek out the window. The families, the children, the smiles and laughter - they're all still there. My throat stings. "You didn't deserve to get snapped at, though."

"It's fine." Aceline slows the car and rolls down her window. Quickly, she converses with the man at the booth and hands him a card. A few seconds pass, then the yellow bar in front of us lifts, allowing us to pass. "I figured that it was a touchy topic for you. Sorry about that." She pulls into an empty parking spot right in front of the tall beige building and takes out a handicap parking sign, hanging it on her rearview mirror.

"You shouldn't be apologizing." I sigh. Aceline puts her hand on my arm, dragging my limp gaze to her bright, silver eyes. "Huh?"

"When I was younger, my aunt had this saying that she would always tell us." Aceline smiles. "The past is like a disease. Whatever you did then will continue to rip you apart if you don't feed yourself the pills of the future."