The Art of Love (Marcaniel Story)

Chapter 14

🚨WARNING- MENTIONS OF SUICIDE, BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER AND ACTIONS OF SELF-HARM🚨

Nathaniel was hiding. Hiding somewhere none of his friends knew about.  A secret spot of his that was special to him and him only. Not even his family or Marc knew about it.

It was a small hideaway in an abandonded building. He sat there, knees pulled to his chest and just feeling numb inside. he didnt know how he ended up in that situation. As soon as Lila had kissed Marc, he snapped and blacked out. The next thing he knew, he was in the boiler room beneath the school, knife in his hand, friends injured and Lila dead by his feet.

It scared him. The same thing happened that other time when that older guy was being rude to Marc and beating him.

"What's wrong with me...?" Nathaniel questioned himself. He sniffed as a sob started to take hold of his body. Hugging his knees, he ricked back and forth slightly, left eye twitching.

'Just let me free...' a voice purred in his mind. 'Then you can kill everyone so no one can ever touch Marc again.'

"Who are you...?!" If he was out in the open, people would think Nate was crazy, having a conversation with no one

'Im you, obviously.'

"N-No...! No You're Not! You Made Me Kill My Friends!"

'Fine. I'm your Yandere side. I just managed to get you to snap and free me.'

"How?"

'Because you became so protective and close to Marc, fulled by your undying love for each other, that you hated to see anyone else hurt him. Lila just went to far.'

"That we can agree on." Nathaniel thought for a moment. "Are you the reason I keep blacking out?"

'Maybe~!'

"How?!"

'You dont know anything about yourself do you?'

"Of course I do! I love Marc, I'm deaf, Bisexual, really talented with drawing and working on comic books! As wellcas that, but Im also a holder of a miraculous! The goat one to be precise."

'But you dont know you have Borderline Personality Disorder.'

"Wha-?! Borderline Personality Disorder...?"

'Yes. You experience intense mood swings and feel uncertainty about how you see yourself, No?'

"Well... Sometimes I do feel like I'm being possessive of Marc..."

'Your feelings for him changed quickly. You began as friends but since you started dating you became more protective. Your feelings swung from extreme closeness to extreme protectiveness. These changing feelings can lead to unstable relationships and emotional pain.'

"But I wasn't like this my whole life, though...!"

'Were you exposed to long-term fear or distress as a child?'

"No..."

'Were you neglected by 1 or both parents?'

"... I did find myself struggling to connect with others since my dad left..."

'Then There's Your Answer! Our Old Man Was The Cause Of This!'

Nathaniel sat there for a little while longer, letting the harsh reality of his life lower onto his already burdened shoulders.

"Or maybe I'm the problem..."

It was getting dark so, instead of going home and risk getting caught, Nate curled up underneath a blanket on a beanbag he had hidden in there for times when je had to escape the world. Closing his eyes, he tried to fall asleep.

--
When Nathaniel woke up the next morning, he found missed calls and unread messages from all his classmates, his cousin, aunt and Marc. His mother and brother had no idea of the situation so there was nothing in his voicemail or inbox from them. That was good. No need to get his mother and brother worried or wrapped up in his crap more then what they already are. His phone buzzed once more. With a sigh, he saw that one of his friends were trying to call him. Marinette. He eventually succumbed to answer.

"...Hello?..."

"OMG!" Came Marinette's voice and the voices of the others, giving Nate the realisation that she's on speaker. "Where Are You, Nate?!"

"... Nowhere... Dont worry about me..."

"But we are worrying about you! You wnt missing!"

"Yeah And?! I KILLED LILA AND OTHERS!"

"That doesn't matter, man!" Came Alix's voice. "Just come back..."

"Why?! So You Can Hand Me Over To The Police?!"

"N-No!"

"Well too bad. And even if you did; Id slit my throat then have to live this pathetic life...!"

"Wait! Nate-!"

Nathaniel hung up and threw his phone against the brick wall of the building in anger. He didn't want to go back to his friends because he didnt want to hurt them. he also didn't want Marc to suffer anymore.

"Maybe it'd be best to break-up with him... It'll save him a lot of harm and maybe I'll go back to being normal..."

A glint shone in his eyes. Looking to his left, he saw a piece of broken glass, from a broken window, and his mind went wild and toxic. The itching feeling of his skin on his wrist became tempting. The glass shard caused some form of want. His fingers twitched while his chest tightened. he started to scratch and ores son his wrist but it didnt satisfy his need for the feeling. A feeling one shouldn't have the addictive need to do. But... the glass was intoxicatingly tempting.

Before he knew it, the glass was dripping eith blood and his wrist was slashed with multiple cuts. Looking around with disorientation, he glanced down at his wrist and saw the marks he had made. When the sting of his exposed skin caught the air, he winced and clenched his  arm, the realisation of his actions dawning on him. His vibrant, Scarlett red blood, built up on his skin before melting down his arm, leaving trails and smudges on his peachy pale skin. He watched the blood for a while. He didn't have any bandages but the dripping blood was entrancing.

He kinda liked the feel of the air burning his exposed skin. Liked the feel of his warm blood trailing down his arm. The relief in his chest and the way he finally felt in control for once.

"I guess I'm more fucked up then I thought..."