feelings

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Sometimes I'm not able to feel anything
I sit numbly and try
to organise my thoughts because chaos is
All that's there
And chaos prevents me from feeling
Because everything is a giant mess

And then in a single moment of silence
My thoughts split and I can't help
But feel everything
Anger and sadness, frustration and envy, confusion
And fear
All at once

That's why I bottle it up
Because a waterfall that crushes me in a single moment
Is better than a never ending storm

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