Heartless Benevolent

11

Inaalalayan ako ni William habang pababa kami ng hagdan. Akala mo naman hihimatayin ano mang oras. Tsk.

"Thea!" Someone shouted my name. I wandered my eyes to where the person was. Si ate Rachel lang pala.

"What?" I asked, confused. Habang pababa kami ng hagdan.

"Hindi ba nagkasundo tayong mag night swimming?" She asked back.

"Yeah?"

"Then what are you waiting for? Gaja!" (Let’s Go!) Gadya? What?

"What?" I asked. Confused by the words she said. Is she cursing me? After we reached downstairs, I immediately sat on the couch and looked at her.

"Are you cursing me, ate Rachel?" I asked in disbelief.

"No, of course not!" She defense.

“Gaja means ‘let’s go’ in Korean.” She explained.

Ohh.. I thought she was cursing me.

“Anyways, back to the topic.” Pang-iiba niya ng usapan. “Let’s go swim na.”

“Ok. Chill.” Pero tinatamad na akong umakyat ulit. “Can I just borrow your clothes? Tinatamad na akong umakyat ehh.” I added.

“Sure, sure. No prob.”

Pinahiram niya sa’kin ang underwire and highwaist two piece niya. And of course, sinagad ko na ang panghihiram ko ng damit niya. I also borrowed a bathrobe from her.

After we finished changing into our swimsuit ay nagtungo na agad kami sa pool. Ate Rachel did grab a bottle of wine and two wine glasses, of course. Mukhang mag-iinom kami ngayon. My alcohol tolerance is not that high, and it’s not that low either. Katamtaman lang.

Pagkalabas namin ay naabutan namin ang mga female oldies sa labas na nag-uusap. But Mom’s facial expression does look like she doesn’t want to be there. Pero ipinagsawalang bahala ko nalang.

We both decided na sa swimming pool nalang kami maliligo. Para half body lang ang mababasa since gabi na.

As I stepped my foot into the pool, cold water welcomed me. Gusto ko ng umurong, but I don’t want to break promises. Especially when those people expect me to do the thing I promised them.

Pero minsan mahirap ding tupadin yung pangakong iyong ipinangako. Lalo na kapag may kailangan kang gawin na ikakawasak ng pangakong ‘yon. Masakit umasa sa wala.

Habang nakababad ako sa tubig ng ilang minuto na ang nakakalipas ay nasasanay na ako sa lamig. Ate Rachel started drinking awhile ago, and so am I.

“Thea.” I was snapped out of my thoughts when ate Rachel called my name.

“Hmm?” I was staring at the night sky, that’s why. Ang ganda kase. Madaming bituin, presko ang simoy ng hangin, at nakakarelaxed pakinggan ang hampas ng mga alon. Payapa. It calms me.

“Nakapagdesisyon ka na ba?” About what?

“Ah? Tungkol saan ate?” Naguguluhang tanong ko. May kailangan pa ba akong pagdesisyonan?

“Of you moving in. Didn’t you ask me about living alone this morning?” She asked back.

Ohh. I still don’t know though. Pero gusto ko. I want to experience what it feels like to live alone.