oh, boy ( h.renjun x male reader ) ✓

042

( cw ! ) : some transphobia & emotional dysphoria

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y/n sat alone in the kitchen at the island counter. it was now 6:58am, and sleep definitely wasn't a possibility for him since his coming out message was going to be posted at 7am. as he waited anxiously, jaemin popped his head inside the kitchen. his face lit up when his eyes landed on his groupmate.

"guys, he's in here!" jaemin yelled as he waved the rest of dream into the kitchen with him. y/n was a bit surprised. most of them didn't like waking up this early, and he didn't want to make them upset or cranky by waking them up.

"why is your dumbass in here all alone?" mark asked with a humored but cross tone. y/n looked down and chuckled while shrugging in response.

renjun quickly sat beside his boyfriend, almost as nervous as the male himself. he smiled comfortingly, silently letting y/n know that everything would be okay.

"you should've woken at least one of us up. we wanna be with you when the message is put up!" chenle said with a little pout.

"yeah, and i'd much rather be woken up by you than by donghyuck's method of waking people up." jeno mumbled grumpily. the boys all laughed quietly as y/n looked at donghyuck with a confused expression. donghyuck just smiled and nodded.

"it's 6:59." jisung said quietly. the room went silent, now filled with agonizing impatience.

y/n kept refreshing the page on twitter. had he not zoned out a bit, he would've been ready to actually see the post come up when it did. his heart skipped a beat as he began fidgeting with the strings of his hoodie.

likes, comments, and retweets began pouring in. everyone could see it now, and there was no going back.

y/n suddenly felt someone squeeze his hand. he looked over to see renjun also looking down at his own phone, but he had grabbed his hand to make sure he still knew he was there. y/n smiled warmly at the gesture, now looking back at his screen.

"hey, there's a comment from a boy saying he's also trans!" jaemin exclaimed. y/n smiled and nodded, seeing the comment himself.

m/n saw many more comments with support and similar messages. but of course, you can never avoid hate. it was no secret that there were some that showed more of a negative reaction. tears began threatening to escape his eyes, but he tried his best to brush it off.

one comment in particular hit home, though.

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"so that's why no one's seen any baby or predebut pictures of him,,, cause he looked like a fucking girl lmao."

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this was a big thing y/n struggled with. he wanted to be cis more than anything. he wanted to have baby pictures that showed a male body. he wanted school pictures of his embarrassing haircuts and uniforms like the others.

"y/n?"

y/n snapped out of his thoughts. the others were all looking at him in worry. he didn't realize he now had tears running down his cheeks.

"are you okay?" renjun asked. y/n lowered his head before breaking down completely. sobs and sniffles were the only audible thing as his group quickly surrounded him in a big hug.

"i'm just-.. i don't wanna be trans.." he muttered quietly as he let out more sobs. those words broke the boys' hearts, renjun especially.

he liked him just the way he was, but he knew y/n's life would've been a lot easier on him if he was cis. he hated not being able to change such a thing for him.

"y/n, we can't imagine how hard it must be for you. but we love you regardless of your identity. we're like a family. we're always going to be here for each other and we'll always support each other. you're like a part of us." renjun said, his voice soft and gentle. the others nodded along, trying their best to comfort their member.

y/n nodded and gave a weak smile. he let out another sniffle before they all parted from the group hug.

"you're such a sap." donghyuck said as he nudged renjun's elbow.

"i will stomp on you, haechan." renjun muttered before returning his attention to his boyfriend.