Beautiful Mistake

7

Trixie's PoV

Habang nakatago sa kwarto ni River I can hear their conversation and I can't help but blame myself for all that his mother is saying

"I'm just spending my last month with her okay?! She wanted a divorce! I'm leaving! Okay?!"

River...

"Ma... who's that old lady po?"

"She's your lola, Zac"

"I don't like lola mama... she's shouting at papa"

"Don't listen okay? Here, play some music and just sit on papa's bed hm?" Sambit ko covering his ears

"Masasaktan ka lang ulit sa kanya River!"

"I know! And I don't give a damn if I do! Mahal ko si Xie okay?!"

What is this mess that I made?

"Xie... Zac? Are you there?"

"Y-yes... sagot ko dito so he opened the door up

"I'm sorry about my mom... don't worry about what she's saying..."

"River..."

"Okay lang ako Xie..."

"B-but..."

"Let's just spend this month together and you can leave after I sign the divorce papers. Like I promised you"

"Papa..."

"Hey there buddy, what are you listening to, hmm?" Sambit niya sa anak namin trying to calm his son down and lift his spirit up sa mga posible ding narinig ng bata 

River's PoV

"I'm finally free from you. Wala sanang magmahal sayo"

"Xie..."

"You deserve to be loved by no one. Tandaan mo yan"

"Xie... please... Xie... Xie!!"

I sat up immediately after waking up from that nightmare. Pagtingin ko sa relos, it's again, 4 in the morning.

"You have to let them go River... let them go... for fck sake... it's your fault!" Sambit ko sa sarili ko holding on to my head but again... tears started to flow down my face remembering how I can't even fix our marriage.

"You don't even deserve her anyways..."

I just decided to stand up and go to the kitchen kasi hindi na din naman ako makakatulog. Baka gustuhin ko pang ubusin yung sleeping pills pag pinilit ko sarili ko.

I walked past the guest room wanting to peak at my family sleeping but I decided not to... baka magising pa si Xie...

I walked straight down the kitchen pero nagulat ako when Xie was there

"Hey..." bati nito saken

"H-hey... why are you still up?"

"I can't sleep..."

"D-do you want to be alone? I'll head back up uhm..."

"No. Sit down, River..."

Sumunod na lang ako sa sinabi niya pero pagkatapos nun wala halos nagsasalita samin until she did

"Do you... I mean... will you really let us go?"

"That's... that's what you want, right?"

"But is that what you want, River?"

"N-no... of course not... i-if I have a choice why would I... why would I let you go?"

"Hannah..."

"Xie... she's already in the past... I wouldn't lock myself up with her memories and be with you... that's unfair Trixie..."

"But you dream of her, don't you?"

"B-before, yes"

"I heard you mumble her name several times, River... saying... saying you love her... saying no... as if you don't want to lose her"

"W-what?"

"Hannah... no... I love you... those were the words clear enough for me to hear... pero paggising mo... paggising mo, you were the perfect husband for me. Pero hindi ko matanggal sa utak ko yung binubulong mo tuwing gabi River... making me think that... you didn't really love me... that you were forced to marry me"

"Xie... those dreams... those dreams were not about her... yes I am dreaming of her but... but I was talking about you"

"What?"

"Hannah was... she was making sure that I... I am not playing with you... as if telling me to love you for real and that's what I was doing everyday for that past year... as far as I remember those dreams stopped when you left too" pagpapaliwanag ko sa kanya

"S-so... so you... you were talking about me?"

"Yes... Xie..."