Why does it hurt so much ( hunter angst toh )

character 2 escaped

Tw: blood, self harm, eating disorder ,

Hunter pov

After me and flapjack was talking about if i should leave or not we decided to give my uncle or belos one last chance but if he does anything bad again flapjack will take me somewhere i Don't know where but he just said somewhere to keep me safe but i didn't really listen to the rest because i heard a knock on my door so i told flapjack to hide in my closet as i was limping to the door it was ...

God dam kikimora again to be honest im getting sick and tired of her more and more each day "hey kikimora what brings you here again" i said " golden guard the emperor wants to see you again to talk about something that happened " she said and Left ' weird i thought we already talked about that issue about me going to the coven leader's dorm ' i said to myself " hey flapjack pass my uniform over please " i said to flapjack as he was going to get my golden guard uniform for me " thanks buddy" i said flapjack went to my closet to hide and i got ready in my uniform and started to head to the throne room again i kept getting bad memories what happened " emperor belos you wanted to see me again" i said on the other side of the door knocking " please come in my nephew " he said and the door started to open

As i was Walking in the throne room i felt like something was following me but it was my uncle he immediately slammed the door and started to yell at me " GOLDEN GUARD I HEARD FROM SOME PEOPLE YOU HAVE BEEN SLAKING" he said angrily " but uncle you haven't given me any mission at all so what am i post to do..." i said really nervous " DOES IT LOOK LIKE I CARE YOU COULD'VE CAME TO ME FOR A MISSION" he said and shot a vine straight at my face i started to cry a little " DON'T CRY IT MAKES YOU LOOK WEAK " he said " im sorry please uncle"

Sorry again i Don't like writing this kinda stuff sometimes

I started to limp out of the throne room with my mask on my face again i said to myself ' i can't let flapjack know about this or he will start to worry a lot and i Don't wanna see him worry about me im just so worthless and useless weak these words are the one that belos said to me" i said and sighed while Walking to my room i felt blood coming down my head and my arms are hurting with the cuts i did last night i also realized i have no more bandeges so i need to go to the healing coven to get more

I opened my room door and saw flapjack on my bed sleeping ' i thought he was to post to be in the closet ' i said in my mind "oh well i need to get some bandeges from the healing coven so i need to put my spare uniform on because emperor belos ripped my old one with some vines " i said sadly

As i put my spare golden guard uniform on and opened my door and closed it behind me to make sure no one can get in cause if they do they will see flapjack asleep on my bed i started to walk to the healing coven . The healing coven was all the way on the other side of the castle so it will take me some time to get there .

10 minutes of Walking to the other side of the emperor castle

'finally i made it ' i said to myself i was breathing really heavy before i knew it i was getting really tired and fainted

I started to wake up on a bed like it had White covers and a blue pillow to be honest it wasn't that comfy at all " looks you're awake golden guard what are you doing here ?" they said " im sorry i guess i kinda past out coming here anyways i came to get some bandeges if that's okay with you " i said " of course you're the golden guard and im guessing emperor belos send you here" as they pass me the roll of bandeges " yeah he send me hear" i said with a fake smile " well i have to go now thanks i guess " i said as my smile was starting to fade away

I was Walking down the hall with my mask on ' im kinda lucky they didn't take it off or they will see the blood coming down my head waiitttt i was bleeding 1 hour ago sooo the blood should be dryed now right ???" i said thinking and looking confused

When hunter finally got to his room ( also he is still confused if the blood is dried )

' if the blood is dried then why do i need bandeges ' i said " oh im here finally " as i opened my door and flapjack flyed to me and starting to chirp ' chirp chirp' " im fine Don't worry hmmm it is 6:00 jeez i missed breakfast and dinner maybe we should to the lunch hall to see how everyone is doing yeah flapjack ? I said as flapjack sat on the bed.

'chirp chirp' ( ok but why are you in you're uniform still)

" oh i had to do something Don't worry im fine"

' chirp' ( ok thennn)

" really im fine "

hunter and flapjack were talking for 10 minutes until hunter left the room and he started to feel pain on his body but hunter was already Walking to the luch hall and flapjack was sitting on hunter bed

' Jeez why am i starting to feel so much pain in my body huh oh im here at the lunch hall ' i said in my thought when i walked in everyone was staring at me i Don't really being stared at so i decided to lean against the wall and stare everyone while everyone else was eating i started to feel sick i always didn't really like to eat it just makes me feel sick even when i look at it i feel sick
'hmmm i should start getting back to my room it's getting late' i said in my mind

" golden guard" someone said i looked down and saw kikimora " yeah kikimora what do you need i was just about to leave to go back to my room kikimora " i said to her " well golden guard before you go back to you're room the emperor wants to see you " she said " fine ill go mind taking care of everyone in the luch hall it's nearly time for them to leave " i said " finnne"

I started Walking back to the throne room again i am starting to feel like this is gonna be daily for me " i hope nothing goes bad again i Don't think i can deal with another beating " i said to myself

" just come in hunter " belos said ' huh i didn't even realized i was standing at the door of the throne room ' i thought i walked in and bowed down to my uncle " you're a little late you know hunter maybe i should give you a punishment for being late" he said " wait im sorry unc...i mean emperor belos i didn't mean to be late" as i was begging for mercy " to late hunter " he said

You know what happened again sorry this next bit has a lot of blood in

I was so tired and i just wanna die i got to my room and fell on the floor Crying my heart out there was blood on my chest a huge cut my leg another cut on my eye and the other eye got bruised blood was dripping down my head and my arm dripping blood but it wasn't that much i sat up winning in pain i crawled under my bed and grabbed my knife and started cutting again now there was a lot of blood dripping down my arm the voices wouldnt stop they keep saying

useless
worthless
Weak
Die
You should never been born
Just burn yourself

shut up
Shut up
SHUT UPP!!!! I yelled out

It woke up flapjack and flapjack was chirping and was trying to keep me calm from having a panic attack it didn't really work but i decided something

" hey flapjack i think im ready to leave this place" i said looking really sad belos was the one who found me gived me everything i had now but i just wanna be free and live my life flapjack though was really happy to hear that i tried standing but i fell over flapjack turned into a staff and allowed me use him as a walking stick or just to keep myself up as i got up i leaned on my door as flapjack turned back to his bird form and got my bag i use flapjack as my cane walking around the room getting stuff i grabbed bandeges , food for flapjack , my golden guard mask a water and i Secret got my knife from under my bed and put it in my bag

I sat on my window sail and say my last words " i hate this place and i hope you rot in hell uncle " i said kinda proud and jumped on flapjack

And we flyed in the night sky......

Author note : i forgot to say there are stuff in here that are kinda not in the owl house like i Don't think they had a lunch hall in the emperor coven also lilith already left the emperor coven also will hunter finally able to live his normal life ?? Or will belos ruin it again ?.

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