Fearless

With Ears To See And Eyes To Hear

Luna's POV

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I sighed and slipped into the hallway, going the opposite direction Louis and Bella went. I needed to clear my head. How could I be such a bitch and not notice?! I sighed as I walked out into the small court yard to the side of the hospital. I put my headphones in and turned up the volume. "With Ears To See And Eyes To Hear" by Sleeping With Sirens started playing and I sat against a tree, loosing myself in the music. I slowly drifted to into a dream.

*in dream*

My feet collided with the pavement hard as I ran down the street. My stepdad's laughter echoed from behind me, sending a chill down my spine.

"Where are you going Luna? You can't get away from me, you useless bitch!" He yelled, only making me run faster.

I burst through the doors of the hospital and ran up the stairs, tripping. My knees hit the cement hard, causing me to cry out in pain. I forced myself up the rest of the stairs and into Bella's room only to find it empty. Suddenly his fist connected with my face, sending me flying to the floor.

"Stupid. Fucking. Cunt. No. Good. Piece. Of . Shit." He hissed, kicking my hard between each word. I covered my head with my arms as his foot connected with my gut. I screamed in pain. I rolled to see Louis, Zayn, Harry, Niall, Liam, Alex, Jack, Zack, Rian, Bella, and Cher standing in the hall. Their faces were emotionless, eyes filled with hate. So much hate it made me cringe.

"Help me! Please! I'm so so sorry!" I yelled to them, my voice cut off as a fist connected with my face. They looked at me one more time before turning and walking away.

*end of dream*

I woke up screaming to the sound of Rian's voice in my ears.

"Luna! Luna! Easy, it's just me! You're ok!" He said as the rain poured down around us. I launched myself at him, wrapping my arms around his torso and burying my face in his chest as sobs wracked my body. He wrapped his arms around me, cooing soothingly to me as I slowly calmed down.

"What happened? You've been gone for like 2 hours!" He said, concern filling his voice as I pulled back and pulled my soaking wet jacket tighter around me in an attempt to stay warm.

"Can we talk about it later?" I asked, my voice barely a whisper. He nodded and helped me to my feet. We made our way inside and back to Bella's room. Everyone looked up as we entered but I just stared at my shoes and went and sat in the corner by Liam. He gave me and Rian a look that said "what the hell happened?" and Rian shook his head, signaling I wasn't ready to talk about it. Liam gave me a warm smile and hugged me sideways reassuringly. Cher and Bella laughed at a video on Bella's laptop and everyone went back to talking or playing on their phones. Zayn handed me a blanket and I smiled thankfully at him before I wrapped it around myself and leaned my head against Rian's shoulder and closed my eyes. I can't believe no one besides Rian even cared to come look for me. But I didn't them, I was such a bitch. I sighed and after a few minutes of listening to everyone laughing and playing games I got up and walked out of the room. I wandered the hallways for hours until I finally came back to the room, well past midnight. I sat outside for a minute before I finally got up the courage to go in. I closed the door quietly behind me, everyone already asleep. I looked for an empty chair, only to find all of them occupied. I sighed, grabbed my laptop and someone's coat, and went into the bathroom and closed the door behind me. I sat in the tub, put the coat behind me as a pillow, and logged onto my YouTube account and started recording another video.

"Hi guys. Im in a bathtub in case anyone was wondering. All the chairs and stuff in the other room are taken so here I am." I chuckled a little and bit my lip. "I uh... I was a pretty big bitch to Cher when she was here before. I didn't mean to be. Even now, I think she hates me. I was also a HUGE cunt to Louis. He liked me this whole time, and I didn't even know.... I hurt him.... I know I did. He won't say it because he's too good of a guy but I can see it in his eyes." I sighed and bit my lip harder. "I had a dream. HE was chasing me down the street, he caught me in the hospital and started beating me..." I swallow "I.... I turned and saw all my friends.... They looked at me.." I sniffled and stifled a sob "they looked at me like they hated me so so much..... I screamed for them to help me. I begged but...." My voice broke as tears started to stream down my cheeks "they walked away and left me to die.... They hated me. I've never seen that much hate in my life.... I..." I started bawling, and wiped my eyes "I've never felt so alone..... I hope to God they don't leave me alone.... That they don't hate me.... But I wouldn't blame them, why should they like me when I don't even like myself?" I shake my head, blinking back more tears "Guys, if any of you ever end up watching this, which I doubt you will... But in case you do, just know I'm so so SO sorry for how badly I've treated you. Especially you, Lou and Cher. I'm so sorry. I love you guys. I hope you forgive me." I stop the video and press the upload button as hot years burn down my cheeks, filling my eyes and blurring my vision. I close my laptop and put it on the floor as I curl up into a ball, silent sobs shaking my entire body. Very very slowly I started to stop crying. As I finally drifted off to sleep, I heard everyone talking and waking up in the other room.