Love You Forever (2013 Wattys Finalist)

Chapter 25 - The Worst Mistake

Robert sat up in his bed and put his head in his hands. How could he have done it? How could he have told Georgie he’d go to Chicago? How the hell was he going to go there, see her, and not return just as broken as when she left him? She’d been gone for two months and he was only just now beginning to pick up the pieces of his life. He couldn’t bear to go through all that again. But what choice did he have? He’d made that fucking promise back at the flat and he’d already said he’d go.

The only thing he could do now was to make sure he didn’t get hurt again. He’d go to Chicago, spend a few days seeing the sights like she said and then come home, nothing more, he thought firmly. And he’d go as soon as possible, get it over and done with so he could put it behind him and move on. He suddenly felt despair overwhelm him as the reality that he was actually going to see her sunk in. Stop it, he thought harshly. He could do this. He had to.

He went downstairs, dressed for work and found his mum in the kitchen as usual, cooking breakfast. When he went to give her a hug and kiss, she immediately looked concerned. “What’s wrong, Robbie?” she asked as soon as he let go of her.

Shit. He wasn’t ready to talk about this. He went to get his tea, avoiding her eyes.

“Something happened, didn’t it?” she said more loudly. He closed his eyes and sighed deeply. He couldn’t allow her to worry about him.

“I, uh, talked to Georgie – this morning,” he said quietly with his back to her, turning on the kettle.

“Oh,” she said. He could tell she was trying not to sound surprised.

“She, uh, asked me – to come –.” He had to stop and take a breath because the ache in his chest suddenly got worse. “To Chicago – for a holiday.” The water was ready and he poured it into his mug.

“What did you say?” his mum prodded quietly as he slumped in his chair at the table.

“I told her I’d go,” he muttered quietly to his mug, fighting back the desolation that was threatening to overwhelm him again.

Fucking pull it together. If he couldn’t keep from falling apart when he was in his own fucking kitchen just thinking about it, how the hell was he going to keep from getting destroyed when he saw her?

“I see,” his mum said quietly, setting his breakfast plate in front of him.

He hunched over his food and started eating as his mum walked away. After a minute he stopped suddenly, dropping his fork on the table with a clatter as a thought suddenly occurred to him.

“What’s wrong?” his mum asked quickly. “Are you alright?”

“I forgot! I don’t have any money to buy a ticket!”

After he’d bought his motorcycle jacket at the car boot sale, his dad had taken everything he had left. Since it wasn’t enough, Robert had to pay him the difference out of his next paycheck. He’d given the rest to Joey to help pay for petrol. Between rent and petrol, it was going to take him fucking forever to save up enough for that damn ticket.

Seeing the look on his face, his mum said, “Perhaps – I could talk to your dad. Ask him if he’d be willing to – pay for it or – at least loan you the money.”

“Would you, mum?” he asked gratefully.

“Yeah, I’ll do that. I’ll talk to him for you, alright?” she said gently.

“That’d be brilliant, mum. Cheers!” he said with relief as he picked up his fork. Hopefully she’d be able to convince his dad, he’d be able to buy the tickets and get the whole thing over with as soon as possible.