My ray of sunshine

Chapter 6-Zayn's backstory

Zayn{1 year ago}

Everyone has a dark side, I too have a dark side. I'm 18 as for right now, I was 17 when my best friend Ravi and I were playing Fifa in my bedroom when he misfortunately died, at least that's what my parents want the world to believe{not to brag but my family was one of the richest families in India}.Brains work in different ways, my mind set is kill or be killed in any circumstance, even if it was just a game, I got my mind going this way from when I was 7, I was always bullied for being on the plus size, it was me to attack them before they attacked me and that mentality stuck in me. I know the truth of what happened, the truth of what happened to Ravi....................... But

As I stared down at my best friend's lifeless body I said, "Ravi was always a handsome guy, with his brown, black hair always covering one eye, that I always longed to brush out of his face, his looks made me look like a troll next to him, all eyes were always on him and I couldn't help but look at him all the time.". The police in India don't give a fuck as long as you are rich and give a fake statement, you won't be bothered and my parent money offer hit the chief's heart like a bullet.

As we all waited for the chief to hand his report to Ravi's parents and the DA's office, I couldn't help but remember Ravi's face as he lied on the ground ugly and covered in his own blood still spouting out of his jugular vein, his lips black as coal and as his disappointed eyes shot daggers into my heart, guilt built up slowly in me and I couldn't help but cry, I cried as I knelt down near his dead body, a feeling I have never felt stuck across my body as lowered myself closer to my dead beast friend's corps, then I kissed him kissed a dead guy, I don't even know why I kissed him but, it felt nice, but this feeling didn't last long, as the world went black and as my head hit the cold pear floor it....

I now remember the dream I had it was a recap of exactly what had gone down in my bedroom. I and Ravi were playing fifa in the bedroom, he was at his fourth goal and I was at my second goal, it was upsetting and even angering, I wanted to destroy him, this feeling was overwhelming and I couldn't control it, I took up the pen innocently seated at my table and within a second it was done, his jugular

Was jabbed and blood was everywhere, as he came to the realisation of what I had just done he gave me a face of disgust then, it changed to a face of disappointment. Then I snapped back to my senses as I screamed and cried and knelt down beside him, as I realised I can never live past this event, then I kissed him.

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I still get nightmares of that day, but to me it is no longer a nightmare it is just a story playing on repeat in my head and knowing that this feeling of an easy every time I wake up is there to stay and there is nothing I can do about it.

Present time

As I walked to the pool with Max, I couldn't help but shake of this feeling of uneasy, exactly the feeling you get when someone is spying on you, then I felt the presence of someone I knew but when Max asked me if anything was wrong I shook of that feeling of uneasy.....

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My parents sent me away to make me to this high school in the middle of nowhere called st petro cathedral school, a school my parents thought would change my type of mentality and I don't ever think a childhood mentality can ever leave even if I tried.

As I sat in bed after an eventful swimming day with Max, the feeling I got earlier creeped in on my brain, sleep lost its way in my thought and now I'm reading a book' it's a book about a continued bad dream. It said

MY BAD DREAMS

" 'It was midnight I heard footsteps stop at my window... A chill ran down my spine and even though it was winter, I could feel sweat trickle down my forehead...'

It was midnight I heard footsteps stop at my window... A chill ran down my spine and even though it was winter, I could feel sweat trickle down my forehead. Who could it be? I was very frightened. I was sleeping all alone in my room and wondered if I should call anybody. When I tried to call my parents, my voice froze in my throat out of fear.

After hesitating to get out of my bed, I finally decided to show some courage and turn on the lights to see who it was. But Alas! When I switched the lights on, they wouldn't light. It was pitch dark and I thought, could lights have gone out for the whole house, or was it only my room as I could clearly see the dim light in the balcony, flickering. I tried to run down and get my parents, but when I tried to open the door, it was locked!

I took my torch and put it on the window, there I saw the most horrifying thing ever! A dim face, with cold eyes staring down at me, upside down from above the window. The torch slipped from my hand, I fell back and screamed at the top of my voice. Now I could see the shadowed, dark, cold-eyed face moving towards me.

I gave my last try and shouted with all my might. Just then I felt the warm hands of my mother tapping my cheek and my mother's soft voice calling out, Aaditri what happened? Are you ok? Did you see a bad dream?

I opened my eyes and smiled, I was in my room again and it was just a bad dream.

Sleep managed to cave in as I slept praying to end up caught, so all my guilt and sins can be paid in full, cause who lives past killing their best friend?