Jungkook's PoV
I fucking lost my voice as soon as I saw the tense atmosphere in the room. But I didn't think it would be this easy. It's almost like the one writing our story doesn't want the two of us to face any obstacles. Be it our parents, our members, or even Bang Si Hyuk hyung, no one raised the slightest objection to us?
If only I'd have known it'd be this easy, I'd have confessed to Tae sooner. Oh so much sooner. Then I'd get to kiss him so many years back. Gosh, I've missed so many kisses. Got to make up for it somehow. Tae has really soft, plump lips. They're a delight to kiss. And, he's an amazing kisser. The way he caresses my hair while kissing me...aah...he's the best kisser on earth. (Yes, I know I have no one to compare him to, but when I say he's the best, it means he's the best. Period.)
"Jungkook"
"Jungkook"
"Kookie"
Jeon Jungkook!!"
Ohh, that's my name,
"Yes?"
"Where the fuck is your head at?"
"Sorry... I... I zoned out"
"Yeah we kinda got that"
"Si Hyuk hyung was saying something important to you"
"Ohh. Ohh. I'm sorry... Please can you repeat?"
"Yes Jungkook-ah, seeing that I have no other option. Basically what I am saying is simple. I've no problems with you two dating each other. But for the sake of the company and the nature of the industry and media in our country, there are going to be some rules... which I guess you two are mature enough to understand. It is going to get difficult if you are spotted outside on your dates, or getting too close to each other. You have to be careful of the media, you know how they get. And also the homophobic public in general. Your fondness for each other is so evident that anyway you two get a lot of hate, in fact, that's all seven of you... I know you guys get a lot of hate, and it's easy to propagate hate online nowadays. Don't let that get to you. As long as you are with each other, everything's fine.
Now, coming to the company. Of course your managers will have to be briefed. I'm sure they guess something's going on, it's practically written on your faces. But I still have to formally tell them. I did not want to initiate any discussions till you two were comfortable enough to tell me. But let me tell you Taehyungie, Jungkookie, not everyone will take the news well. Not every director will react well to your closeness and they will react according to their understanding of the audience. They will sometimes ask you to be clingy in the name of fanservice, and sometimes separate you in the name of audience discomfort. Don't let that get to you.
Also, this will sound really negative right now, but do think about the group too. Sort out your issues, and don't let them hamper the group's image or performances. Sometimes it will be really hard, but I will still ask you to do it. If you... if you guys break up while the group is still together, it's going to get really challenging, I won't know how to handle it, neither will these guys. They love you both too much, as do I"
"We won't break up."
I'm shivering. Shivering at the last few words of his long speech. I don't want to think about it. Why... why did he have to bring it up? My worst fear. Losing Tae.
There's a hand on mine. A hand I know very well. A hand I love. And I can feel the tension leaving my body. Then I hear his voice. In a tone I have never heard before. It's calm, collected, soft, and...and... sure.
"Hyung. I... We... hmm. Trust me, we're so, so grateful for your support, so grateful for the strength and the love we've received from our members. Though, you know, we shouldn't need to be. What are we being grateful for? The permission to love? Just because we are idols? Sounds really ridiculous when I sit and think about it.
But, I know we're privileged. Privileged to have this support...and I, we, Jungkookie and I acknowledge that. With all our hearts. We never thought it would be so simple to sit and talk about our love with all the people that matter to us, people who are family. But you have all been wonderful. And trust us, we won't let you down. We'll make mistakes, yes, we'll get into trouble together, like we always have, but we won't let you down. We won't let us down. We can't do that to BTS. I know I'm the baby of this group though Kookie is younger, but I speak for both of us today because we, somehow, are too tuned in to each other's thoughts. So I know he will back me up on this.
We've also worked as hard as the rest of the members to reach where we are today. We're in our twenties, we have dreams. We want to achieve so much in life. We've loved each other from the time we did not understand the weight of this fame. And yet, we put the band before us. So now that we're older, we won't suddenly put our love before the band. You have to trust us as much as we've trusted you with the most precious thing in our lives.
Scripted dialogues, and the stare of the camera, and the pressure of being famous, cannot ruin what we have. We're stronger than that. And we're as much BTS as we are Taehyung and Jungkook."
I'm whipped for this man.
People do not know the depth of Kim Taehyung. I do. He still manages to surprise me every time. But I do know that behind that childish exterior lies an ocean of depth. It shows sometimes, when he is absolutely sure of something. And he is absolutely sure of us. Always was.
Bang PD and the rest were quite speechless at my boyfriend's monologue. Jimin hyung looks awestruck. So we decided to leave for now, with a promise that we'll be getting together soon to figure out some nitty-gritties of how to handle our relationship, now that we're officially together.
Later in the night, when we're lying on our bed (we converted his room to our bedroom, though the partition remains for SNS live purposes), Tae suddenly looks at me and says, "Kookie I'm sorry for speaking for both of us back then. I should have discussed with you"
"Tae, didn't you say we're completely tuned into each other's thoughts?"
"I did"
"It's true. I wouldn't change a thing about what you said. It was beautiful, my love"
"But incomplete"
"Huh?"
"There's more to the thought"
"And?"
"And I stopped myself because that part of the thought, I only want to share with you, for now"
"Tell me, bear"
"It's...it's not gonna be easy, baby. This journey onwards from here. They'll script in arguments, and distance, and clinginess, and skinship, based on what people want to see. Sometimes it will collide with what we really feel. And it's not gonna be easy. But I want you to know that, in all of this, you have me. Always. As I know that I have you. We, we will need to always communicate, talk about things that bother us. Sort it out. Because...because..."
"Because?"
"...because when it all ends, and one day it will. This fame, this constant surveillance, this limelight, the concerts. One day it will all end, but we won't. And we will have a lifetime ahead of us, that will be scripted only by us, by what we want, not by guidelines set by others. I believe in that. In our forever. I need you to believe in that too. So that whenever it gets too much, the thought of us, in our cosy home, away from prying eyes, lying just like on our bed, still in love, more in love...makes the fakeness around us not matter anymore..."
"Hyung"
"You called me hyung?"
"Yes Taehyungie hyung... I believe in everything you say. As long as my safe place is with me, there's nothing to worry. Also..."
"Also?"
"We won't break up"
"We won't break up"
"Ever"
"Ever"
"I love you"
"I love you more"
"Try"
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Destined
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