"she plays guitar?" wilbur soot x reader

cold

tw: smoking, sh. if you get triggered by sh, i recommend to think twice before reading.
you have been warned.

I enter the bathroom. No one. Perfect.

I open my bag and search for my little box frantically. I know I always carry it with me. I know I have to have it. I have two boxes. A during, and an aftercare. It's what I call a box of razors and another one of cigarettes. I mean, I didn't particularly enjoy smoking itself, due to my lungs, but I loved the feeling.

I find my boxes and enter a stall, realising how fucked I would be if I were to just forget about how I was standing in an open space. I lock the door behind me and sit down on the closed toilet. I pull up my sleeve and without any thought dig a razor into my skin. Fuck.

I should've done my leg. I promised to go swimming with Tom once him and his friends all met up. Well, can't turn back time. Can't just hit rewind on my actions, sadly. I go in for another jab. I then go for another, and another until my arm is covered completely. I think this might've been my worst relapse. No part of my arm was safe, not even my shoulder.

I clean up, not wanting to leave a puddle of blood on the floor. I have stopped the bleeding on my arm with toilet paper. It stings, but I'd be okay as long as no one walked in. Luckily, the universe felt bad for earlier, so it spared me a bit.

After about 15 minutes of bleeding everywhere, I've finally put my "jacket" back on and stopped bleeding completely. Now for the aftercare. I take the box and grab one cigarette. I'll probably go through two, but for now, just give me one. I find my lighter and light the cig. I take a puff and remember doing this when I was just 11. Good times... not really though.

——————

I have sprayed myself with immense amounts of perfume, enough to drown, honestly. I ended up smoking 3 cigarettes. I don't know why or how it happened, but I just hoped that Wilbur had left. I walk outside the bathroom and there I see it. A sight I didn't wanna see at all.

A tall, hunched over, fluffy-haired brunette eating a chocolate croissant while looking at his laptop. I notice theres a croissant on the other side of the table as well. That's sweet. He has his earbuds in and he types something every 2 seconds or so. He doesn't notice me standing there. The bathrooms are right to the left of him, but he doesn't notice.

I don't wanna tell him shit, so I won't. I'll say I feel sick and I'll leave. I don't care about the song anymore, I just wanna go home. As I start walking over to our table, I see two girls approach it as well. They look about 18 or so. I could use them as a distraction to make a run for it, or I could have a talk with Will like a mature adult.

Thing is, I'm not a mature adult, really. I take my chance to leave the cafe as soon as the girls start talking to Wilbur. I make eye contact with him. He looks surprised and worried as he looks me in the eyes, but I keep walking. I open the door and exit the cafe.

I hadn't realised it was pouring it down, but I think a walk in the rain is the perfect excuse for two things. Crying in public and staying home sick for a week. I walk, and walk, and walk, and walk, and before I know it, I'm home. I swiftly walk inside, dripping on to front door carpet, and lock the door behind me.

I break down mentally, sliding my back down the door, sitting down. I don't realise how cold I am until I start shaking uncontrollably. My hands, legs, lips, torso, arms, everything was trembling. This feels too familiar. As an 8 year old, I used to hold Tom when he was sick like this.

It was usually after long days at school. He got bullied and his anxiety turned into panic attacks in only a month after school begun. I was always there to comfort him, always. But now, who is here to comfort me? Who will hug me and tell me that everything will be okay? No one, but...

My little brother.

As I shiver, I see Tom come down the stairs and run to me. I know he knows I relapsed, because my sleeves have run up to my elbows, but I just wanna feel warm. I'm so incredibly cold, and I just wanna feel warmth.

"Y/n! Stay awake, please for the love of... fuck me... what did Will do? Why did you come home early? Why didn't he drive you? He said if the weather got bad he'd drive you. What happened Y/n?" He says stressed. He rubs his fingers over my scars and looks at me. He moves quite hastily.

I couldn't speak. I tried to speak but I couldn't. Tom knows what he needs to do, so he picks me up, barely, and walks me to the bathroom. He takes off the platted shirt I was using as a jacket and rubs my arm. It's covered in scars. He turns on the shower and puts me in it. Then, slowly changing the temperature from cold to warm, he warms me up. I fall asleep in the warmth.

——————

I open my eyes, slowly looking around Tom's room. I see him sitting at his desk and I can hear him. He seems angry. "Tom?" I ask, voice cracking groggily. He throws his headset away from his head and walks over to the bed where I was laying. "Y/n! Oh my fucking god, I was so fucking terrified. I'm so glad you're okay, oh my god. Fucking hell..."

"I'm sorry, Tom, about all of this. I've been here for like a week or so and I've literally done nothing to help you or support you. I'm sorry, and thanks for helping me by the way. And sorry you had to see my... yeah..." I say guilt crippling through my eyes. I was talking frantically, but he got every word.

He hugs me and tells me it's okay. I look over to his PC to see he's on call. "Oh, who's on?" I ask suddenly feeling a burst of energy. "You seem hyper. It's Toby and Will, at the moment. Niki is on a date with "the foxy waitress" is what she called it. She said you'd understand." Tom says chuckling at the last bit.

"Oh my- FUCK YEAH, FINALLY! They had chemistry, undeniable chemistry at that." I say as I slowly get up from Tom's bed. He seems confused as to why, but he realises I wanna talk to his friends, so he gets up and unplugs his headset. "I don't think you can walk. Your legs gave up when you tried to walk before." Hm, I don't remember trying to walk, but alright.

"Y/n! Oh god, I was so worried. Tommy said what happened." Toby, Tubbo, said. "Hey Tobs! I met your sibling today, I did NOT know they were your sibling." I say with a shocked voice, exaggerating my voice so he'd understand what I meant. He laughed a bit and Tom looked at me. "Wilbur." he whispers to me so the call wouldn't hear.

"Oh yeah, hi Will. Sorry for umm... today in general I guess. If you're still up to try to write music, I think I'd actually be better with melody." I say trying to pretend like it wasn't as awkward as it was. I could sense the tension from the loud silence that came from Tom's speakers.

"Oh, yeah, sure! Are you like- okay? You seemed upset, I was worried, I wanted to follow you out, but those girls literally assaulted me after you left. They're literally in the precinct at the moment." Will said, obviously trying to switch topics. "That's horrid, but yeah, I'm... fine." I said looking at my arms, which were now in Tom's hoodie.

"Alright... how about we just meet up at yours? Tommy will be there in case something happens! That sound alright?" Will suggests, and I actually think it's a good idea. I look at Tom, who gives me a thumbs up, and say yeah excitingly. I'm glad he still want to make music with me! Plus, I needed to apologise in real life.

"I feel like I shouldn't be here. Oh, my boyfriends calling anyways, bye bye!" Toby says as he leaves the call. He sounds so happy when he talks about his relationship, I couldn't be happier. "Well my girlfriends also calli- oh shit she actually is. You two can talk, I'll be in your room." Tom says as he smiles at his phone. Such a little gremlin.

"How the fuck did that happen?" Wilbur asks and I laugh to myself. "Him getting a CALL from his girlfriend, or him getting a call from HIS GIRLFRIEND?" I say exaggerating some words to make my point. We both laugh a bit before Will asks a question I didn't wanna hear.

"So what exactly happened?"

——————
this is 1578 words. i got a bit carried away, lolz.
anyways, STOP SHIPPING Y/N AND TOMMY WHAT THE FUCK.
theyre siblings, incest is nasty, you whores. no but for real, i got a comment ab it and my jaw dropped, i deleted it, no need for that in my life, thanks!