The Quarter Mile (Fast and Furious)

Act III

I couldn't sleep not with the endless thoughts running through my mind. Mia went into our room while I remained outside and wandered about before eventually returning to the patio.
"You should get some sleep." Brians voice came up behind me. I turned around to look at him,
"And why aren't you sleeping?"
"Had a lot on my mind. Can I sit?" He gestured to the ground next to me. I nodded lightly and looked back out at the street lights and small raggedy buildings.
"I'm sorry about everything again Charlie. I know why you don't want to trust me anymore and I don't blame you."
"I don't want to talk about this Brian."
"Well I do."
I looked at him with slight surprise before furrowing my brow, "Why are you so persistent on this?"
"Because I'm tired of fighting with you. It shouldn't be this hard Charlie."
"Well I'm sorry I make life unbearable for you Brian." I tried to walk away but he took ahold of my wrist and pulled me back around.
"That's not what I'm saying. I can't put into words how much you mean to me and I know I've fucked up but my loyalty has always been to you and Dom and it always will be. My plan after he got arrested was to always come back to you whether I could get Dom free or not. Whether we ended up with bounties or not. I always said I would come back to you."
"Why?!"
"Because I refuse to loose you again!" I looked away from him but he grabbed ahold of my chin and turned my gaze back up at him.
"My loyalty has always been to you Charlie and I think my actions have proved that."
"They've proved that your reckless!" I hissed out quickly and pulled myself away from his touch as I made my way down the patio steps and walked into the small alleyway.

"And when has Dom not been reckless! The whole damn business you guys started is built on chances."
I whipped around immediately
"Chances Dom took on trust Brian. Dom once never lied to me!"

He continued to close the distance between us until his face just a few inches from mine, "The lies I told were for your protection."

"So that makes it okay?! It's bullshit." I sneered and pushed him in firmly in the chest. He got in my face again and I pushed him back but he grabbed ahold of my arm before I could turn away.
"Get off me!" I shouted but he wouldn't let me go.
"Look at me." He said as he gripped ahold of my upper arms. But I refused to, "Look at me!" He said again but louder and shook me a little bit.

"You can't keep everything bottled up inside you about the past!"

"You don't know anything about my past!"

"I know enough Charlie! I know that I don't want to loose you but I can't keep doing this anymore. So you need to figure it out."

"I don't have an answer for you Brian! I don't know what to feel."

"Fine. If you don't what to feel then just listen. If you don't feel anything for me anymore, fine. If you want to be pissed off about things in the past that no one could control or change, that's fine too okay but don't sit here and ever think that I didn't try to make it work. That I didn't love because I do and that's what makes this so hard but I can't force you to love me."

I felt overwhelmed with shock and fear. I could feel tears swelling in my eyes. He didn't say anything after that. He just walked away back towards the house. I could hear the glass door slam shut. I stood out in the darkness completely confused. He's never walked away from me like this.

"He's right you know?"
Doms voice popped in from behind me. I turned around quickly to face him.

"How long have you been standing there?"
"Long enough."
"Which means you heard everything."
"Just most of it."
"He fucked up Dom." I started to try and defend myself.
"We all have Charlie. It's in the past now. This isn't the first time he's saved my life. I owe him for that."

"Yeah and He's the reason you went to jail to begin with and the reason why our lived are messed up!"

"And he got me back out Charlie. Fair exchange. You know that wasn't his fault."

"I don't know what is real anymore."

"Charlie, come on. Despite everything he's done. No one has ever sacrificed as much as he has."

"I've sacrificed everything! He can go back to a regular life! We've seen it but I can't. We can't!"

"Charlie."

"I'm so sick of loosing things Dom and loosing people. We lost Jesse and Letty. God only knows where Leon is and if we can even make to Rio we might see Vince. I'm so sick of loss. Dom and if I had." I stopped mid statement and just began to cry.
Dom came up to me and pulled me closer. I wrapped my arms around him firmly for a few minutes. Once I pulled away he held my face in hands.

"Tell me are mad at O'Conner or are you mad at yourself."

"Maybe." Was all I could muster.

"No maybe's. He cares about you a lot Charlie Almost as much as I do and this isn't your fault. It's not is either. I've seen him put his life on the line for us,
Charlie and that takes something most people don't have."

"I just need time to think. This is all so overwhelming." I wiped the tears from my eyes and adjusted my denim jacket.

"So take time and think about it but think about what your giving up also."

I nodded a few times and Dom gave me a quick kiss on the head. "You need to get some rest." He added and gestured towards my room with Mia. He walked over with me. I went in quietly and took of my jean jacket and set it aside on my bed. Mia was fast asleep. I stepped into the bathroom and starred at my reflection for a minutes. I ran my fingers through my hair and splashed some cold water on my face. After sometime to myself I decided that I didn't want to feel pain any longer. I didn't want to keep crying or being fearful. It was a distraction and was only going to make things worse for us.
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Ducking out the door again, I went over to Brians room and quietly knocked on the door. My stomach was in knots and I felt my heart beating more rapidly. To my surprise the door actually opened. He was still dressed which must have meant that he hadn't fallen asleep either. It was about two in the morning and we were supposed to leave for the airport at 7. He looked surprised.
"I need to talk to you." I said before he could speak first.
He opened the door wider so I could come in.
"Are you alright?" He asked immediately. I could see the concern in his eyes mixed with confusion after all we had just fought thirty minutes ago.
I nodded a few times while biting down on my bottom lip. "I just wanted to that I was sorry."
"Charlie it's really late."
"I'm serious Brian. I'm trying to apologize for a bitch to you earlier."
"I don't want you to feel rushed into doing or saying anything."
"I'm not being rushed."
"Well I know Dom was out there and that he talked to you."
I crossed my arms over my chest and felt immediately offended, ""I'm not apologizing because he told me to Brian."
"I'm not saying that you are."
"I'm just genuinely trying to apologize." I averted my gaze from his in order to prevent any tears from sweeping in my eyes, "I shouldn't have blamed you. Deep down I think I was really blaming myself and was taking it out on you."
He took a step forward,
"Charlie I never meant to come in and ruin your life."
"And you didn't. I promise you didn't. I just got scared."
"Of loosing Dom?"
"Of loosing everything. My life, my job, my family and you. I don't want to go back to being alone like I was before meeting Dom and Mia. I don't want to go back to the way things were before I met you."
He was looking at me more intently with each word I spoke.
"I've never had anyone in love with me before and I never felt love for anyone the way I feel it for you and I don't know why I've tried to deny for so long. I guess because the more people you let into your life the more you risk loosing them."
"Listen you aren't going to loose me alright, or Dom or Mia or anyone else."
"You can't promise that."
"I will. I'm not going to leave Charlie and neither are they." A few tears swelled up in my eyes as I nodded my head. Brian immediately took one hand and cupped my face as he leaned in to kiss me. His hands gripped up underneath my thighs as he lifted me up. My legs wrapped around his torso the kiss becoming more fast paced. He moved us over to the bed and laid me down on top of it stopping only for a second to pull off his shirt. I pulled off my tank as he came on top of me and started kissing my chest and neck. I could feel his hand traveling over my bare legs as he maneuvered his over to the button on my jean shorts. He kissed me deeper than ever before. My nails digging in lightly into his upper back and shoulders.
"I love you." He spoke breathlessly after laying a few kisses on my stomach.
"I love you." I said meekly in reply. He smiled wider and kissed me again before continuing down to explore the rest of my body. I was dizzy and breathless. It was the first I had felt true happiness in what seemed like months.