Jetstream (Hawks Angst)

mental hospital

Hawks spent a week in the mental hospital.

He came out of it feeling just as shitty as before, but with medication he couldn't afford.

Aizawa and Mirko were able to help him tell a caseworker the situation, and soon enough they had a huge legal team preparing and actively attacking the commission. They had bodyguards to protect Mirko and Aizawa at all times. Somehow they'd become the face of the operation.

Someone in the emergency room had leaked Hawks' suicide attempt.

People were worried about him.

All he could think the whole time he was locked away from society was how much he must've ruined everything. How much people must not trust heroes now.

But it went a completely different direction.

But the time Hawks got out of the mental hospital, social media was swarmed with posts about raising mental health awareness for heroes, trying to get the idea unsewn in the flow of thought that heroes never needed help. That heroes were still people too, despite their job.

He was relieved, but left with a heaping pile of other problems.

He got home to his apartment and it was trashed. The most noticable things were the randomly charred pieces of wall and furniture. Then there were completely broken appliances. His sink faucet bent backwards, the door of his microwave torn off, the glass on the door of his oven shattered.

His bed was one of the items of furniture burnt. His sheets were rubbed grossly in the black ashy mess.

The bottom supports were broken and everything sank in.

His blinds were cut and torn off their stands. His TV was flat on the floor. His fridge was warm. His windows were broken and stuck open. All his spare clothing was burnt to a crisp. The porcelain of his toilet was cracked and the water has evaporated from the basin. His bathroom drawers had been rummaged through.

There was a pack of razor blades sitting on his counter. Unopened. Taunting him.

He'd bought them himself, someone had placed them there on purpose. He grabbed one and without hesitation slid it into his wrist, melting down the wall as he added more and more, sobbing as he realized he had nowhere to go.

He pulled out his phone, looking for some kind of comfort. He found himself crying more at the thought of contacting Mirko for more help. He was supposed to be okay now.

He found himself emailing Dabi's concise email address.

He didn't expect Dabi to show up, he just needed someone to talk to, and judging by the amount of unread emails he had from dabi while he was in the mental hospital, he was up to chat.

He sent him a short email explanation.

"Was in the mental hospital. Still feel like shit. + My apartment is completely ransacked. What's the point of anything."

Then he put his phone down and made another slit into his wrist. And another.

And soon he was completely sobbing, knees tucked up to his chest, beginning to feel hopelessly dizzy. He glanced back down at the cuts he'd made.

They were deep. Really deep.

He was hyperventilating. One hour free from the mental hospital and he'd already relapsed so bad he'd need stitches not to bleed out.

He went to message Dabi again, his thoughts and reasoning foggy as blood seeped through his sleeves to his other clothes.

"Think I cut too deep lol I hate everything. I still feel just as horrible. I don't have anywhere to stay"