Blood I've Spilt

Help

Slow down you crazy child

You're so ambitious for a juvenile

But then if you're so smart tell me

Why are you still so afraid?

Where's the fire, what's the hurry about?

You better cool it off before you burn it out

You got so much to do and only

So many hours in a day 

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CW! This chapter contains really upsetting, damaging, and sad topics so be aware of that while reading. Take care of yourself </3

January 21st, 1996

The only sound that was present was the spoon against my mug. I hadn't been sleeping well so I decided to make some coffee. It was rather late so silence surrounded me for the most part. This beverage just felt right at the moment. Especially with some creamer. I was damn lucky that my mother was a heavy sleeper and my father was the snoring type. It made it easier to sneak around at this time.

I had been trying so hard to keep my head held high, believing that this whole thing would be over soon. That's just what I've been telling myself lately even though it was obvious it was just a fib to make me feel better. Now that I was alone, I sniffed. I wasn't going to cry; there was no room for self pity.

I tiptoed out of the kitchen and down the hall to the seating area. There was a window next to one of the armchairs, the moonlight lighting up the small space. It was the only light in the little room. Not too far away was a fireplace that never got its real use. Father occasionally used it to venture to the ministry; they had connected it to the floo network a long time ago.

I curled up comfortably in the arm chair and took a deep breath. Right now was the only time I had felt peace in a while. I used to get it from reading Draco's letters but Ace and I had to cut off our connection with the boys completely. Things were getting quite scary lately. I was worried about a lot of things; the main thing being my brothers. I rarely see Keith whilst Ace is not doing good at all.

After I finished my coffee, I set the mug on the small lamp table beside me. I decided to rest my eyes even though I was falling asleep. I was in for it tomorrow if my parents spotted me here instead of in my room but it was too late now. I couldn't get myself to stand up.

***

"You bastard, that's my foot- ow!" A voice whispered loudly, causing me to jolt awake. I wasn't a heavy sleeper in the slightest. However, my vision was blurred from the sudden wake-up. I squinted around the room. My head was swimming with sluggish thoughts that I couldn't even process what was happening.

"Why are we even here?" A different voice grumbled. They weren't even trying to be quiet.

"You didn't have to come, dumbass. You don't even like either of them," the same voice from before snapped rudely. Slowly, I came to a stand and stumbled closer.

"Lumos," A smooth voice muttered, the end of his wand illuminating. My eyes trailed from the end of the wand to a dark hand. My eyes widened at the sight of the lanky boy; it made me so excited that I gasped. His eyes snapped up to meet mine and without hesitation Blaise stepped forward and hugged me. I was shocked at first but it was a warm and welcoming embrace. It felt so brotherly I felt comfort for the first time in what seemed like forever. Blaise had never actually touched me in a way like this so I was shocked at first. Although, I ended up hugging him back. He finally pulled back to look at me. His features were hard to see, as were mine. He stepped away to hold his wand with the small light between us.

"Where is Ace?" He said sternly. Before I could answer, Blaise was being pushed away by Malfoy. My heart fluttered and I stood there in awe. What should I do? Draco made the first move, tucking hair behind my ear. We both fell into a warm hug that I wished could last forever. It had felt like months since I had seen him. I felt him kiss the top of my head and I breathed in the smell of his cologne.

"Fuck, I missed you," Draco murmured, resting his chin atop my head. I clutched the fabric on the back of his clothes. That's when I noticed they were all wearing casual clothes that I had never seen them wear before. Draco wore a plain grey tee shirt with baggy jeans and a black jacket. Maddox wore grey sweatpants, a zip up garment and a black beanie. Blaise wore converse, baggy grey jeans, and a nice sweater.