The Promise

7 - Alone

Bright

Oh god, please help me, i cant help but crying all the way home. I never expected this. I felt sorry to disturb their family function.
I walk to my room and start crying. Now i know he is not busy, he just forget about me. Grandma was wrong, he just dont like me.  Why i am so stupid i ask my self. I cant believe i am waiting for him since i was ten like a stupid guy.
I can see how his partner hold his hand.
And i dont even response to any flirt because i felt tied to our engagement.
I never imagine they are having this grand party every year while i am waiting for him with my birthday cake. I must be stupid. I felt sorry for gulf. I believe he did not know about this and he also look confuse. I send him a message saying my sorry and ask him to take care. I really like him.
Its only me being in this relation alone and now i will let it go for real. I really dont want to get involve in their family again. I dont want to make it hard for everyone.
Daddy , i want to go home. I call my dad.
Within an hour my dad already in my room and hug me gently. What wrong brighty he ask me. I dont want to stay here anymore. I am sorry daddy i said and hug him tight. Its ok baby, lets go home he said.

Its been four years after that night.
I am now waiting for my driver with my granny. She is now very old and sick. She want to end her last day in our country. I cant say no to my sick grandma. We have been in japan all this year. I really cut all my relation with my fiance family. Gulf try to contact me a few time. But i refuse him and I think i am growing man now. I am not that innocent guy like before. I know how to survive without my helper.
I also know who my dad are and i also know about the promise.
I cant get angry with them, just regret he dont end it well with me. Beside that i dont have any feeling. In my innocent day, i pray and dream he will bring me out from my small world.  But who knows i was never exist in his life.
Are you ok grandma, i ask her while pushing her wheelchair. She nod slowly. This is our routine when we back from japan. Grandma now trying her best to fight his illness for me. I really cant let her go. Brighty, can you promise grandma she suddenly ask me. I look into her eyes, yes grandma i said. Dont be sad too long if i leave you. No grandma, i wont promise that, i dont want you to leave me. Please brighty, promise me she said, touching my face. I finally nod when i her tearing eyes. I love you so much grandma i said and hug her gently. I love you too brighty she said and smile to me.
The next day is very cloudy day but nothing can compare how i felt now. Grandma was not here anymore. I just sit blankly looking at my grandma.
The funeral which is quiet and down suddenly become busy. I dont care about anything and just focus on my grandma.

Lets us take care of him. Its his mother wish i heard someone talk to my dad. I cant let you let him leave alone.
She trust him to us after his grandma. She know you cant be there for him. He said firmly. No my dad said coldly. Over my death body he said and leave the hall.  Brighty a lady call me with a tears. Oh my god brighty, i miss you so much she touch my face and hug me gently. She sit beside me and wait for condolence from people. I was shock when i see my fiance family was here. I can see gulf and his dad wait for me quietly. Gulf look so handsome now. I look around, but i cant see p mile
Thank you aunty, i said and smile to her.
Its was a hurtful day for me. I look for my dad and hug him tight after i said my last farewell to my grandma. Lets go home dad i said slowly. He kiss my nose and cheek. I wish i can read his face. I can never read his face. Brighty he slowly said and hold my face. There is no one there anymore he said. I cant let you live there alone he said again. I have you daddy, i can wait for you i try to comfort him. I am sorry baby, i cant let you live alone. I look at my fiance family  who now patiently waiting for me. No i said softly to my dad. Please brighty, please help daddy he plead sadly. I can live with you daddy, i promise i will behave, i said try to persuade him. No you cant baby, i wish your mother are here today, i miss her so much he suddenly said. I look at him try to understand the situation.  They are your mom family. She wish you will be with them and not living in my world. We love you so much brighty. How about you daddy i ask him. I will always find my way to reach you like always. I will always love you. Just like before i will go to you, wherever you are, i will always go to you he said and hug me tightly.
Now i know i have no word in this anymore. I can only hug him and cry.
Are you promise daddy, i ask him. He kiss my forehead. Daddy promise baby, he said before slowly push me to my ex fiance mom.