CYPHER | BTS

35: HOPE

- T H I R T Y F I V E -

July 02, 2020
Thursday

📍London

༺❀༻

Choi June

This feeling won't last forever, is what I tell myself again and again when moments like this arise.

Yoongi had burst into my hotel room wearing one of the most beautiful smiles I'd ever seen, hands full of bags filled with various disguises. I don't know whether or not I'm supposed to cherish these moments. This feeling won't last forever. Does that mean I hold onto it when it's here, or ignore it so it'll hurt less when it's over?

Because I feel all sorts of giddy when he pulls out a blonde wig, tries to fit it perfectly on my head, and then laughs when he takes a step back to realize I look absolutely ridiculous. It contrasts how I feel, because ridiculous isn't it. If anything, I feel like I'm floating and he's the one bringing me there.

I shouldn't feel this way. I try to stop. It doesn't work.

"What's all this for?" I finally ask as he pulls out a baseball cap and secures it on his head. He even tucks the strands of his hair behind his ears.

"We," he begins, flashing me a grin. This time, I let myself admire the way his eyes crinkle, the way he opens the gates of his impenetrable walls to let me see that, for once, he's been happy. "Are going out, and I don't want people recognizing us out there. London's our biggest show yet."

I watch him pull out a pair of sunglasses from his bag and put them on his face too. I make a face. "So why do you get all the cool disguises and I don't?"

A laugh bubbles out of him. "All right." He takes the wig off my head and tosses it on the unmade bed. I try to tell myself I don't absolutely love it when he runs his fingers through my hair to fix the mess the wig left behind. That'd be a lie. For a change, he's grooming me.

He takes off the sunglasses on his face and puts them on mine. "Happy?"

I just grin.

Yoongi's idea of a disguise is sunglasses, a baseball cap, and a mask. He doesn't tell me anything about where we're going or what we're doing when we walk together down the hall, the elevator, and through the lobby. The only thing I know, is that he had a car arranged for him to take, so that's where we go when we're finally outside.

The soft hum of the radio fills the air in the scarce moments of silence between us. Yoongi pulls his mask down and I follow in suit, and then I ask for the hundredth time, "Where are we going?"

I'd gotten no heads up he even wanted to hang out with me today. As far as I was concerned, Cypher were supposed to be going over tonight's mission all day. I guess Yoongi just wanted to escape for a while.

"Around," is all he tells me.

"Around?"

"It's London, Choi. There's things to see, things to do. You ever been to London?"

"No. Have you?"

"Once." His lip quirks up in a smile. "I think. I don't remember."

"How do you not remember?"

Yoongi chews his lip. "I was high for most of our last tour. Don't really remember anything, actually."

I tear my eyes away from him to look outside, at the people we pass and the buildings too. The cars and traffic and life moving all around us as we drive through the city, everyone unaware of the chaos within our lives. And then I look back at Yoongi, or rather, at his hand resting on his thigh. I reach across the center console and slide my fingers along his wrist, pulling his hand onto my lap.