Courting

Chapter 22

(I have another milestone i wanna get to, let me know if you think I should still keep writing after that)

The consensus of the group was Ao'nung would make tsaheylu with Neteyam; it was the only idea anyone could think of to wake him up. However, they all - Neytiri in particular - had reservations about taking the choice of Neteyam's mate from him, without consent. But no one more than Ao'nung trembled at the thought of stealing this life-changing decision from him. Despite this, it was their best shot.

Congregating back in the marui holding Neteyam's unconscious body, the Metkayina and Omatikaya family's formed a semi-circle around the boy. Ao'nung was ushered close to Neteyam's side, where he looked down at the dark blue skin covered the beautiful golden eyes he loved staring at so much. He cleared his throat, turning to the room.

"Um, could I be... alone?" he asked nervously, looking to Neytiri for support. Pursing her lips, she nodded and ushered her children to the doorway along with her mate. Ao'nung's parents looked at him apprehensively, but they too turned away. Lo'ak and Tsireya were standing arm in arm to his side, Ao'nung's sister looked at him with so much support and comfort Ao'nung felt it run through his veins. Lo'ak nodded to him,

"Good luck dude, trust me, Neteyam won't hate you." Ao'nung didn't remember telling Lo'ak of such a fear, but was glad for the comfort. Reaching out the squeeze his hands, Tsireya said

"You know what is right, Ao'nung. This is the best option, don't beat yourself up too much." She pulled him in for a hug, and left him quietly, leaning on Lo'ak's shoulder as they too exited the marui. Turning back to the restful face of Neteyam at his waist, Ao'nung knelt. He held his face in his hands, feeling his wet cheeks as tears ran down his face. He hadn't fully explained to anyone how much this action was tearing him apart. Ao'nung wouldn't wish this feeling on his worst enemy, the uncertainty and dread. Neteyam might hate him forever, regardless how they felt about each other at some point or another. Ao'nung wouldn't, couldn't, blame Neteyam for this, he was taking away his free will. Sniffing loudly and rubbing his eyes, Ao'nung made himself look back to where he usually saw Neteyam's glittering eyes staring back at him. He reached to the back of his own head, and pulled his queue in front of him, the shining black hair resting loosely on his palm. He weakly raised his other arm to hold Neteyam's queue, unable to look at the restful face, unseeing eyes closed. 

Should he say something? Try and give some warning? Ao'nung didn't know if Neteyam could hear him, but was it worth maybe scaring him with the approaching bonding? This felt so wrong. Neteyam couldn't do anything, no indication if he wanted this or not, no way to stop Ao'nung. Pushing these thoughts aside, Ao'nung chided himself it's the only way to wake him up, otherwise he will die. The thought sobered him up and he breathed deeply. Despite the screaming at the back of his mind, every nerve telling him not to take advantage of Neteyam like this, Ao'nung brought the dancing strands at the end of their braids together and closed his eyes; he couldn't watch his breach on Neteyam's choices for the rest of his life. 

When the braids met, Ao'nung felt as if the space inside his brain had doubled in size and capacity, the number of emotions and thoughts doing the same. Suddenly, he felt a wave of pain in at the back of his skull, and his eyes felt heavy. Struggling not to collapse, Ao'nung opened his eyes; Neteyam's eyelids were fluttering. 

Ao'nung didn't know how long he sat there for, fighting to keep his eyes open. While he sat, thoughts and emotions that weren't his flew threw his mind. He felt embarrassment for no apparent reason, anxiousness. Confused, Ao'nung realised these must be Neteyam's thoughts, and he was experiencing them through the tsaheylu bond. Trying to strengthen the bond and send his own emotions through to Neteyam, Ao'nung closed his eyes and thought hard. He thought of Neteyam laughing, chasing Tuk across the sand. He thought of holding around Neteyam's waist as they glided on the back of Kyra. He remembered the gift he had given Neteyam, the blue and white ankle charm. He recalled how they had looked at each other on the beach, his rush of emotions at being pinned below Neteyam. As we was channeling the passion from these emotions, Ao'nung felt a hundred others hit his mind as if in reply, and exchange between the two boys. He remembered exhuastion that wasn't his, lying down well after night had fallen, and waking up before first light, before anyone else. He felt sore from labouring in the sun all day, and resentment at the lack of notice. He saw himself at the top of the rockface bordering the forest and sea, glancing down at the water below; it was far beyond a survivable fall. He considered jumping, feeling the rush of air below him as he did back home, riding a banshee across the treetops. Ao'nung knew these weren't his own thoughts. 

Suddenly, as if by force, Ao'nung's eyes flew open and he was met with the impossibly wide eyes of Neteyam staring back at him.  Neteyam's pupils went wide, and Ao'nung knew Neteyam was experiencing something similar to him. For a time, the two just stared, still shocked from the sudden influx of foreign thoughts and alien emotions. Suddenly, Neteyam jumped up, but the hammock style bed was not a good platform, and he collapsed on the ground. Instantly shocked out of his stupor, the bond severed, Ao'nung gripped Neteyam's shoulders and helped him up. Pulling Neteyam against his chest, Ao'nung sat him up. Neteyam flinched away at the contact, but turned around. Suddenly, the entrance to the marui was filled with the silhouettes of Neytiri and Jake. Close behind them, the rest of Neteyam's family was gathered, with Tonowari and Ronal at the back, and Tsireya next to Lo'ak. Tuk squealed and ran around Jake's waist before he could grab her. She flew at Neteyam and landed in his lap and effectively knocked him over. Neteyam scrunched his eyes up and immediately pulled Tuk into his chest and wrapped his arms around her. She had tears in her eyes and did the same, holding onto her brother with desperation. 

Ao'nung stood quickly, stumbling backwards to make room for the rest of Neteyam's family to gather round. He blinked, still in some shock from the feeling of the linked braids. He was still processing the thoughts he had received from it. He then realised that Neteyam had seen his thoughts, too. What had he seen? Ao'nung wasn't a super secretive person but he definitely didn't want his crush, boyfriend, friend, whatever, seeing some of the things going on inside his head. 

Neteyam POV

The pain had returned in full force the next time he woke up, still hidden below his eyelids. He heard voices around him, but his brain felt like it was full of sand. But then he heard that voice, Ao'nung. Suddenly, he put all his effort into trying to understand every word. Ao'nung had asked to be alone. Why? Was he going to say goodbye? Did the others think Neteyam was dead? Unsure, Neteyam waited patiently, straining his ears; he couldn't hear anything. He waited for what felt like years, until suddenly his brain tingled and he felt a tug on his braid. Neteyam didn't have time to consider what was about to happen, how the next minute would change the rest of his life. He felt the thoughts of who could only be Ao'nung rushing through his mind, and felt his own escaping him. He panicked; what would Ao'nung see? Before he could summon the nerve to move or sever the connection, he was hit with a wall of emotion that didn't belong to him. He saw glittering gold, he saw Tuk running along the beach and himself following. He saw an arm wrapped around his own waist underwater, atop Kyra. He saw the gift Ao'nung had given him, the one he couldn't feel but knew was on his ankle. He almost felt the heat of Ao'nung below him after pinning him down on the beach. Along with these thoughts, a strong sense of something overwhelmed him. Was it happiness? No, too sad. Anger? No, it was more delicate than that. The realisation of what Ao'nung might be seeing hit him again, and his eyes suddenly opened. 

The next few minutes were very confusing, the lights were too bright, sounds too loud. He held on to Tuk just as tight as she gripped him, burying his teary eyes in her shoulder. He made himself look up and see the rest of his family crowding around, his brother linking arms with Tsireya. This made Neteyam almost smile, glad to see his idiot brother had finally made a move. He looked around, trying to find Ao'nung. Seeing his boyfriend, friend, whatever, standing behind him looking dazed. Neteyam was now terrified, he didn't know what Ao'nung might have seen, but he knew that almost anything surely would have been enough for Ao'nung to realise how Neteyam really was. Neteyam was a permanently worthless son of the amazing Toruk Makto, constantly in his father's shadow, stuffing up everything. Not someone fit to court the son of Olo'eytkan. Not someone worth courting at all. 

Every thought was confirmed when Ao'nung looked down at him and immediately stumbled out of the door.