30 Days Too Late

Forgiveness

Rudy

I gaze at my lock screen, where Dexter's smiling face lights up the display. My heart tightens as I press my phone to my cheek, longing to feel his gentle touch on my face.

"Rue, the funeral has already started, sweetheart. We were supposed to leave 20 minutes ago," my mother says, rubbing my head.

"Rudy," she bends down to look at me.

"You haven't spoken in two weeks, son," my dad calls from the door.

"He's dead," I whisper.

"I know, sweetie. To honor him, we should attend the service. I'm sure Lily and your friends would love to see you there as well," she helps me to my feet. My dad adjusts my suit and fixes my tie.

"Lily left a wooden crate with a note. She said it's best to open it after the service," my mother informs me.

"A crate?" I ask.

"Yes, it seems important. We didn't open it," my father replies.

"Okay," I say, heading into the bathroom.

"We'll be in the car; the crate is in there too," I hear my mother say. I look at my reflection in the mirror. I look terrible. A clink of metal hits the floor, drawing my attention to a diamond ring.

"This is his," I whisper, tears falling onto the sparkling gem. The honking of the car outside makes me flinch.

I descend the stairs and pause by the kitchen, glancing at the knife block.

"Rudy," my mother's stern voice cuts through.

"Okay," I respond, walking past her. The sudden brightness of the sun blinds me for a moment. I sit next to the wooden crate, which is indeed made of wood. I retrieve the envelope from my coat pocket. Dexter's bloody fingerprints are still on it. He must have pushed himself to deliver it to me; it must be personal. Yet I haven't opened it yet because I fear that when I do, I'll fall apart.

I glance at the box, searching for the note.

"Rudy, Dexter asked me to give this to you after he passed away. He said what's inside is very important and that only you should see it. I wanted to make sure it got to you before my parents went through his room. If you ever feel alone, remember the others and I are just a call away.

Wishing you the best, Lily"

I tuck the note into my pocket for safekeeping. I have no idea what could be in the box, and I'm hesitant to open it. "It's at their house?" I ask.

"Yeah, that was Dexter's wish. His mother said he wanted to be close to home one last time," my dad replies.

I sniffle, trying to hold back tears. Is this what he meant by his last words?

My father opens the door for me, and I step inside. Almost everyone turns to face me, their gazes filled with judgment. I grip the crate tightly to steady my nerves.

"Rudy, you came," Lily says, hugging me. "Are you doing okay?"

"I don't plan to stay for long," I respond.

"Well, Dexter is in the living room. No one's in there right now," she says softly. I release a shaky breath and head in that direction. My eyes meet his body in the casket.

I feel physically ill. I had hoped for a warm smile, the familiar red tint of his cheeks. My tears fall onto the box, like rain.

He would want me to say goodbye, to face my fears. I turn slowly and walk toward the casket, keeping my gaze fixed on the ground.