Someone I used to know

The stars (Mattheo's POV)

It's been a couple days since the party and since the morning after, where Y/N was nice to me for once. I don't really understand what's happening between Y/N and me. The first time we met, she immediately walked away after hearing my name, like she already knew me or my name at least. And everytime I tried to talk to her afterwards, she either ignored me, cut of the conversations or just walked out before I could even say something. It feels like she hates me, eventhough she hasn't even tried to get to know me. 

And what's even weirder is, that everytime that I see her, it feels like I somehow know her. I don't think I've ever met her before the beginning of this year, but it feels like it. I feel like I've known her for years and it makes me want to be close to her. Eventhough, all she does is push me away. This feeling also makes me so jealous when she hangs out with other guys. Just like at the party where she first talked to Cedric and afterwards made out with Theo. It makes me so mad to see her with them, eventhough we're not even friends. I don't know what this feeling is. And I want to talk to her about it, but I can't. After that day at breakfast, where she finally spoke nicely to me, she went back to avoiding me. There has to be a way to talk to her about everything. Maybe she knows why I'm feeling what I'm feeling and that's why she keeps avoiding me. She has to know something, doesn't she? 
While I was deep in my thoughts, thinking about everything, I wasn't paying enough attention to where I was walking and I bumped into someone. 'I'm sorry. I wasn't paying attention.... Oh Y/N, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to.' How can it be that I would bump into Y/N of all people, while thinking about her. 'Don't worry about it.' She said curt. I was just thinking about finding a way to talk to her and now she is in front of me, so I'll try it now. 'Y/N, can I please talk to you for a second? I wanted to ask you something.' She looked around her for a brief second, before saying: 'I'm sorry, I can't. I... I... have a... Herbology. I... have to go.' And with that she walked away again. I just wanted to talk to her and once again she avoided me, and this time with a more than obvious lie. Professor Sprout, our Herbology teacher, is not at school today, so Y/N could in no way have Herbology class right now. I just have to find another time and place where I can talk to her, without her walking away as easily. 

During the rest of my day and during my classes, I have been thinking a lot about when I could talk to Y/N, maybe I should just go to her room and talk to her then. But, then she can just not open the door, so that might not work. Next to thinking about this all day. I just had this nagging feeling that I have to look at the stars tonight. It feels like that will help with something. I just don't know what. But, like they say 'nothing ventured, nothing gained', so I guess I'm going to spend my evening looking at the stars from the astronomy tower. 

I'm halfway up the stairs of the tower, when I hear something at the top. Maybe, someone is already there? I walk up the rest of the stairs and low and behold, Y/N is up here as well looking at the stars. 'Hello, Y/N.' I say since she hasn't noticed I'm here yet. 'What are you doing here, Mattheo? Did you follow me here?' She responds. I did not follow her here, but I understand why she might think that. 'I wanted to watch the stars, what about you Y/N?' 'Same here.' It stayed quiet for a second, before I started talking again.
'You know. When we bumped into eachother today, I just got this feeling like I missed someone or something and that I would somehow feel better when I would look at the stars. I don't know what it is about you, but ever since I met you, I just have these kinds of feelings. Something about you feels familiar, but I don't know what.' I said it. Now, I'm just curious to what she will say about it. 'I don't know what you're talking about. But, I need to leave.' Once again, she going to try to walk away. I won't let that happen this time. 'Why do you always need to leave when I'm around? What did I ever do to you, that you always avoid me?! I thought something was different a couple days ago, when you said goodmorning to me at breakfast, but once again you're leaving immediately when I'm in the room. I don't get it Y/N. Can you please tell me what I did?' It might sound a bit desperate, but I just need to know, why she keeps leaving. 'You didn't do anything wrong, Mattheo.' 'Then, what is it, Y/N?! It started the first time that we met, I just told you my name and the second you heard it, you ran out of the Great Hall. Ever since that moment, almost every time I talk to you, you either run away, avoid me or cut me off when I try to say something to you.' 'It's nothing.' 'It's not nothing Y/N. You try to pretend I'm not there, but guess what? I exist. I'm a human being and I deserve something other than just rudeness. So, just tell me what's wrong!' 'I can't!' 'What do you mean you can't?! Why not?!' 'Because you don't remember!' What the hell is she talking about? 'What don't I remember?' 'Everything, but it's for the better.' This all is more confusing, than the avoiding. 'Why is it for the better? What don't I know? What do you know, that I don't know?' 'Just forget about it Mattheo. You shouldn't know. It's safer this way.' What the fuck?! 'What the hell do you mean it's safer this way?! For who is it safer? What is going on, Y/N?!' 'Just, leave it Mattheo, please.' And with that she once again ran away. 'WAIT!! Y/N!!' I ran after her, but somehow she disappeared. What the hell just happened? This is worse than it was before. Now I know she knows something and that's why she has been avoiding me, but what does she know? What don't I remember? And what does she remember? I have to figure this out and there's only one way. 

I ran back to the commonroom and went straight to Theo's room. 'Theo, I need your help!' 'What's wrong, Mattheo?!' 'I need you to do something for me and you have to promise not to tell anyone.' 'Okay, what is it?' 'I need you to go in my mind and somehow find out if I knew Y/N before she went to school here.' 'What are you talking about? Why would you have known her before she got here?' 'It's just this feeling that I have. It feels like I've known her for years, which I can't remember. And I just spoke to her and there's something she is not telling me. She told me I don't remember, but I don't know what she's talking about. So, I need you to go into my mind and search for memories of her. I just need to remember what she's talking about.' 'Are you sure about this?' 'One hundred percent. I need to remember.' 'Okay, here goes nothing.' 

A/N: the parts that are in italics are memories of Mattheo that Theo and Mattheo are seeing. 

I sat down on Theo's bed and Theo grabbed his wand. 'Legilimens' Theo said and inside my mind he went. 
'I'm walking into the Great Hall, Pansy jumps up and yells my name: 'Mattheo, you're finally here! Where were you?' I explain to her, that I had to deal with something, before I notice a girl I haven't seen at Hogwarts before. She's apparently Pansy's sister. She hears my name and walks away.' 

'I see my father coming out of the basement. I ask him what was going on. He tells me everything is okay and that I don't have to worry about who just walked out of the door. He says something and my mind forms blank spots when I think about who just walked out of the door.' 

'I'm on my broom flying in my backyard and I'm throwing a quaffle towards a girl. She doesn't catch it and flies the quaffle back up to her by using magic. I yell at her, that that's not fair. She yells back, that life isn't fair, while laughing at me.' 

'I see the same girl walk into my room and say 'hi' to me. I say 'hi' back and say the name 'Y/N', before asking her how she's doing.' 

After seeing these memories, Theo gets back out of my mind. 'Who was that girl, Mattheo?' Theo asks me. 'That's.... That's.... Y/N. She used to be my best friend when we were younger... And.... I.... I... Forgot about her. How could I forget about her? How?' 'What happened with your father in that second memory?' 'I... I... He... I remember saying goodbye to Y/N in my room and when I got out later... I.... I saw her leave. She... was... crying. I didn't know what had happened. She told me that she would leave and that I should look at the....' 'You should look at what, Mattheo?' 'She told me to look at the stars, when I missed her. She told me that. That's why I wanted to look at the stars today, after I bumped into Y/N. She told me that, the last time I saw her.' 'What happened to her? Why didn't you see her anymore?' 'I don't know. She walked out crying and all who were left, were my father and I. He came from the same place as her, but he told me that I didn't have to worry about Y/N. He told me that everything was okay and next thing I remember, is that I didn't remember anymore. He must have done something, because I forgot about Y/N after that.'

It stayed quiet for a second. Then, Theo started talking again. 'You have to tell her, you remember her.' 'I can't do that, Theo.' 'Why not?' 'She doesn't want me to. She doesn't want me to know.' 'Why wouldn't she want her best friend to know she exists?' 'I don't know. Something happened that day with my father. Something that made her leave and never return. After that day I never saw or heard from her again. And today, she told me that I didn't remember and that it was safer this way. I just don't know, what she meant by that.' 'Can you really not talk to her about it? She could tell you what she meant and you can figure everything out together.' 'I don't know if I should. What if I push her away even more? I had a hard time with her pushing me away, when I didn't know who she was, but now. Now, I know who she is and how much I've missed her, I can't have her even further away.' 'That's why you should talk to her Mattheo. If you don't she's definitely going to keep pushing you away. If you talk to her, maybe she will change her mind and finally let you back into her life. Or at least tell you why she has been pushing you away.' 'Okay.' 'You're going to talk to her?' 'Yes, I am. You're right. I need to know what happened back then and I need her to know how much I've missed her and how much I want her back into my life. She has always been the best friend I've ever had and I don't want that to change.' 'When are you going to do it, Mattheo?' 'I don't know. Maybe, tomorrow. But, right now, I'm just going to get some fresh air.' And with that I walked out of the room and into the courtyard.