Through the eyes of you - a Heartstopper fanfic

Late Night Talks

Ben's Pov:

"So he didn't talk for a while?" Tristan take a sip of his drink. "Yeah he just totally shut down." I trail off. "Do you think he's going to go through with the marriage?" He tilts his head to the side. I shrug my shoulders in response. "I think he will. I don't know if it's the best thing anymore." I sigh. "Why do you say that?" "I don't know. I guess it's just feels forced. Sometimes I think we got back together because he felt it was just easy."  I play with my food suddenly loosing my appetite. "Nothing about your dad getting cancer and planning a fake wedding while having a separate boyfriend was easy to go through." He laughs. "Yeah I guess. But getting back with me was easier than facing his fears with Nick." I shake my head. "Facing his fears?" He scrunches his face. "It was easy with me. I know how he likes his pancakes, I know his favorite movies, I know I have to eat with him even if it's the smallest amount. I know his sweet spots but also I know when he's over stimulated and needs space. I know everything. With Nick he has to go through all of that again. It was easier with me." My chest tightens. "Oh" Tristan looks down.

After dinner:

"I guess I better get going, I think Charlie is probably home by now." He nods his head. And I climb in the car, making a call on my phone. It rings and rings but goes to voicemail. I toss it into the seat next to me. I'll just drive straight there. It should be fine.

The closer I get the more anxious I feel. I don't know if this is the right thing. I park on the street and look up at the house. The bedroom light is off but I can see a soft glow coming through the window. He must have his computer on. I work up the nerve and walk up to the front door. Breathe just breathe. I remind myself. I knock on the door and my heart beats out of my chest.

"Ben what the actual fuck" Darcy opens the door. I think her jaw hits the floor. "I, I tried calling Nick but he didn't answer." I stutter. "Charlie's not here." She crosses her arms. "I know. I want to talk to Nick." "No fucking way" she steps out of the door. I see Nick peering down the stairs. "Please just 5 minutes." I yell so he can hear me. Darcy turns around and Nick nods his head. She moves aside and I follow Nick back upstairs.

Charlie's Pov:

Ben walks through the door. He immediately turns and heads upstairs and turns the shower on. Maybe the dinner didn't go well. I turn off my show and follow him up. I crack the door open "honey you okay?" "Yeah baby, I'm fine" his voice cracks a little. I walk into the bathroom more and sit on the counter. "How was your dinner?" I play with my hands in my lap. "Really good, I asked Tristan to be my best man." I nod my head but remember he can't see me. "I can't believe the wedding is in a few weeks." I blush. I can't believe I'm getting married. For a split second my mind wanders to Nick. My heart tightens and I feel like I can't breathe. I miss him. But I'm happy right? This is what I've always wanted. Right?

Nicks Pov:

I sit on the bed crying. I feel lost, unsure what to do. I know what Ben said but it can't be true. I hear the door crack open. "Nick honey are you okay?" Darcy slides in. "Yeah.. I just." She cuts me off and throws her arms around me. "You spoke" she squeals. "Okay okay" I laugh pushing her off. "I can't believe you remember how to talk. Is this real?" She pinches me. "Your supposed to pinch yourself." "I know that's for not talking to me." She pouts "yeah yeah" I wave my hand. "You okay?" She nudges me. "Yeah. I'm okay. I'll be okay." She nods. "So what did Ben want?" She trails off. "I don't know exactly. I don't think I really understand or maybe I just don't want to believe it." She shakes her head "that's vague". I nod my head in agreement. Ben asked me to keep it quiet. I hate him so I don't know why I agreed. But I'd do anything for Charlie. Even after he shattered my heart into pieces.

Ben's Pov:

I get out of the shower and Charlie is still sitting on the sink scrolling through his phone. I wrap my arms around him tightly and my heart breaks a little. "Come on let's go to bed." I pick him up. "I love you" there's a small break in my voice. "I love you too" he smiles and lays his head against my chest. I lay Charlie in the bed and tuck him in. I lay down next to him and stare at the ceiling. Charlie starts to snore and I pull out my phone and text Tristan.
     B: can we talk tomorrow?
T: yeah what's up?
     B: nothing just a favor to ask.
T: Kay
I toss my phone on my night stand. I'm doing the right thing. I run the phrase over and over until I just start to believe it.