Lost Half

22

Dear Ethan,

Today was the first interview I've had since I had Ethan. Since I'm taking care of him at home, the interviewer came to our house. Her name was Sandy. With my baby in his crib at my side, she began the interview.

"Hello, Emily, how are you?"

I smiled. "Hello, Sandy. I'm pretty good."

"Good. Now tell me.. How come you have fake legs?" Sandy asked.

"I was in a car accident a year ago now. My best friend died, and I lost my legs." I paused. "I've gone through a lot of therapy, both physical and emotional."

"I've heard your baby is named after your best friend from the accident. Is this true? Why did you name him after him?"

"I did name the baby after Ethan. He was my first lover. He was my best friend. We did everything together and I thought of him as family. Once he died, I felt like I lost half of myself. The only way I could feel better was to name Ethan the way I did. It's like I apologized and everything's okay now."

Sandy nodded. "How have you been dealing with being a thirteen year old mother?" she wondered.

"It's been rough already, and I'm sure it will be in the future as well. I understand it will always be difficult to raise a child, no matter what the age, it's just tougher when I'm not even in high school yet. By the time I graduate, Ethan will be five."

"How will you raise Ethan on your own? Will the father be in his life whatsoever?" Sandy pressed.

I shook my head. "The father was sent to boarding school before he raped me. Now I'm positive he's going to jail. Ethan is my baby. I never gave permission to the father to hurt me like that. I didn't want the baby."

"Do you want Ethan now?"

"Of course I do. I didn't want him before, but once I was pregnant, I loved him. Ethan's my son. I love him with all my heart already," I answered.