Never ownED myself

chapter 12 : Trust

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Trust is earned
When actions meet words.
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It was raining, her magic was still acting up and overtaking her body. A lightning lashed through the sky illuminating the top of the trees under the ravin she was standing on. Leah had retracted the moment Tom shoed up. Just like Leah, Tom had an effect over Annie's magic. He helped her contain it. It was frustrating for Annie, she couldn't do it alone. She needed to find a way to own her magic on her own and become independent. Until then, she needed him around badly and she couldn't afford to be mad at him.

Tom pulled her away from the edge she was standing on and made her spin in his direction. Annie's heartbeat spiked.

"Tell me that you understand why I did and said what I said. Please tell me you do." His eyes showed desperation making her anger diminish.

Can I  trust him? Can I forgive and forget?

Annie's desire to go back to her mother diminished. Annie wasn't good with people. Besides her siblings, she had no one until she was sent to college with Tom. Her social skills were bad at best, but he had proven to be worse. He proved to be cunning and heartless towards her for some reason and she wasn't sure she could handle that side of him. Yet, his pleading eyes and the long silence was excruciating over her mind and body.

How can I harness any Angry feelings towards him when he looks at me this way? She asked herself.
"Do you get who I am? Do you know how little I know at all about the supernatural world?" Grr, she was out of breath for a second. "I could have killed you!, don't you get it? I am an animal, a monster, I don't even know what I am capable of! Do you know how scary that is?"
Annie trembled uncontrollably with that realization.

The truth was finally out. She had said it. "I am scared of myself." Those words were stocked in her head weighing in her mind for a while.

Since a few days back when the informant died showing her that her father was alive, she had learned to fear herself. Back then and even now, no one had cared about what had occurred, but three full trained werewolves had been decommissioned by her hands and she had little to no recollection whatsoever to it. She had come back to her senses only when the man transferred his memories into her brain giving her a glimpse of her bloody hands. That blood wasn't hers. Annie looked at her heads as she remembered the sight.

"Don't you get it? I am not human nor a commun paranormal creature. I might not even have a soul." She was screaming at the end as puzzling images flashes invaded her mind. They came and went like uncontrolled waves. Leah had assured her that it wasn't her doing. Annie knew something else was going on inside her. After all, why else was she able to see her ravaged face filled with anger, her deadly speed while the magic cursed through her body casting lightning bolts through her clawing hands which were piercing through a werewolf chest...

Tom slid his hand over her shoulder and locked his eyes with hers. Annie's tormented mind became quiet.

" No, you wouldn't, you wouldn't kill me... banged up, maybe, I looked for it..."

His green eyes were profound and like magnets that she couldn't resist.

How can he be so sure when I don't know it myself? She asked herself.
" You're wrong to trust me," Annie told him while trying to peal herself away from his grip. " I haven't mastered my powers yet, I'm unpredictable; maybe you should distance yourself..."

He cupped her face with his hand and looked into her eyes.
How can he even look at me at all? His eyes... those eyes...
A memory crossed her mind. It was the last day that her mother had shown her any affection whatsoever. She had pated Annie's head before leaving for work. After that, she was kidnapped waking Leah from her slumber inside her. Leah saved her and as a reward Leah was sealed with a spell casted by a whole coven of witches and Annie was sent to a college far away in another state. Since then she never saw her family again. She was never allowed to talk to her siblings. Worse, she later found out that their memories were tempered and they had a funeral for her. She was dead to them. She had been discharged.
Her eyes were stinging. A hand pressed on the top of her head.