Summer to Memories

16 - late night talkin'

Sage's POV:

It's 3 am.

It's 3 am, and Kara and I are stargazing. There's not many (light pollution) but there's still just about enough stars in the sky.

"Sage?" She asks.

"Hm?" I ask, looking at her.

"What's your biggest fear?" She asks, looking at me. I sigh and look back up at the sky.

"What Losing my mom," I say.
"You?" I ask.

"Becoming my mom."

"Mine's my dad," I whisper.

"Yeah, he's pretty shitty."
"Has he always been that way?" She asks.

"No. He used to at least pretend to be interested. Enough for my mom to think he was good and me. But.. by the time I was 11? No he didn't care."

"My mom's a drug addict." I look at her.

"But she's so loving. She's so.. she's my best friend. She's just bat shit crazy."

"Like.. she's buys me books and tells me she loves me and holds me when I cry but.. she does fucking drugs! And she- when she does them it's terrible!"

"I understand," I say.

"My dad was an okay person until he started drinking. And then he drank and drank and drank and it's.. it's so bad."

"Yeah," she whispers. My mom calls. I pick up and put the phone to my ear.

"Hi mommy," I say.

"Hey. Where are you baby girl?"

"Stargazing with Kara. We're in the little forest preserve," I say.

"What time do you think you'll be home, baby?"

"Is everything okay? Do you want me to come home now?"

"Yeah no I'm okay I'm-" she sniffles.
"I'm okay," she whispers.

"Are you having a panic attack, mommy?" I ask, sitting up.

"I'm okay, Sage."

"I'm coming home."

"No. No stay-"

"I'm coming home. I'll see you in 15 minutes."

———————————

I walk into the house and see my mom sitting at the island with her head down. I go and rub her back.

"Hey, mommy. Sleepin?" I ask. She looks at me and stands up. She hugs me.

"No," she whispers.

"I just- I had a bad dream and it sent me into a panic. I'm sorry baby I-"

"No don't apologize, mommy. It's okay. I understand. I hug her tight.

"I used to get nightmares about you all of the time. Some of them were so vivid I couldn't sleep for hours." She holds my head.

"I heard the front door open is everyone okay?"
Momma Mollie asks, coming downstairs.

"Yeah," momma says. I pull away and look at her.
"Yeah I'm okay."

"Are you sure?" She nods. Mollie looks at me.

"I got her," I mouth. She nods. The two of us go upstairs and into my room.

"I'm sorry. You can stay with Kara, baby-"

"Mom."
"You've been gone for a year and a half. Okay? When I had a nightmare about you dying the only thing I wanted was to get in your bed and have you hold me."