Shit Happens in Summer

fifth|Javier

Im mad as hell right now. I wanted to express my feelings to Zarion, but things didn't come out right. I'm surprised he hasn't asked me if I liked him. He speaks his mind a lot but not when we're alone. I don't know what the hell I do to make him put up walls.

I act impulsively when I'm with Zarion, only because he makes me happy. As a friend...?
If I keep acting on impulse I'll lose Zarion for good. I dont know why he jumped out of the car like that out of nowhere. He really must've not wanted to be around me.

I reach my house and I rush my way in. I'm emotionally and physically tired. To my surprise my Mom is home from her business trip.

Mom: Javier, baby!
She tightly hugs me and plants a kiss on my left cheek.

Javier: hey Ma.
I could tell my mom was tired but she was still beautiful and cheerful.

Mom: you OK?

Javier: yes

Mom: I know when somethings wrong, your eyes are red. Tell momma what's wrong.

Javier: I'm just gonna go rest

Mom: let me know if you need anything.
I walk down the hall to my room.

Mom: hold up.
I turn back and face my mom.

Mom: who's shoes are these?
I look over to Zarion's shoes sitting in the corner of the living room.

Javier: oh, yea they're my friends's

Mom: I thought I told you not to have any company?

Javier: I got lonely, you were gone a whole week and a half Ma!

Mom: alright Javier, I'll leave you alone.

I walk back to my room and I close the door. The TV is still on my Netflix app, I put The Boondocks on. I really need somebody to vent to. I need that person to be Zarion, I want to talk things out, I can't lose him.

I text Zarion.

Javier: we need to talk
It has a little light grey "s" beside it. He definitely blocked me. I check his Instagram and I see that he posted 5 minutes ago, "Kik me back bro", I comment and like the picture. He looked good, he had on a light pink Tommy Hilfiger shirt. I felt like he was looking dead at me with those brown eyes. 20 minutes later he Kik messages me back.

Zarion: what we needa talk about

Javier: about us

Zarion: there isn't us

Javier: there is a US as friends

Zarion: k

Javier: I'm sorry for how I grabbed you bro.

Zarion: you almost got fucked up

Javier: I know lol

Zarion: that shit not even funny

Javier: sorry

Zarion: yea, and I think we should just work on being good friends before "shit happens"

Javier: OK bro, when can I see you

Zarion: IDK nigga

Javier: k.

After that he didn't reply, I can tell he's not really trying to be bothered with me. It felt wrong calling him bro after what I did last night. Already he was talking to me. The rest of the day I do nothing but play Call of Duty and talk to my mom about my new friends. Mostly about Zarion.