𝐀𝐃𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔, cassie howard

THEPERFECTPAIR.

✫

Falling in love came easily to Cassie Howard.

It was like a natural instinct. With McKay, with the guy before him, and, as she woke up with Selena under her sheets, brunette hair splayed on her pillow, both laying shamelessly on the tombs they dug for themselves the night before, she realized it was happening with the girl too.

She felt it as her head rested on the latina's chest comfortably, torso covered by the girl's arms that wrapped around it, whispering to each other so as to not wake Lexi. And in the moments later too.

When she was left alone in her bed, as she laid on the soft mattress and let everything fall into place in her head and fully sink in her heart, she felt it.

As she allowed herself to think back to what they had drunkenly done, and to wonder why she felt so good afterwards considering she had been avoiding the temptation for weeks to protect her relationship with her boyfriend, she felt it.

She didn't ponder on that last inquiry for too long, though. The answer came to her without much effort. The aftermath was peaceful because her heart knew she had loved Selena long before any of that. Long before McKay, even.

Selena Flores, and her silly sense of humor, the plethora of rings that occupied her fingers so often, coupled with a cigarette dangling between them. Her protective nature, her aroma, her love for rom-coms, and all the bad stuff, too.

She loved her friend, and she knew her friend loved her too.

The idea of even beginning to question Flores' love for her had never crossed Cassie's mind. They had always been solid, it all had always felt genuine between them.

Despite that, however, on her silent way home after reading that loose sheet out of Selena's notebook from rehab that clearly wasn't meant for her eyes to ever see, her friend's crush on her became a bit too real to just ignore.

Because even though the blonde had always noticed the lingering looks and the passionate dislike for her exes, the knowledge went from being a smoke cloud lingering around like nice perfume to cold water crashing down on her.

The world taught her that she had to wonder, even if she felt like shit while doing so, if Selena could be just like everyone else. If Selena was no different from all of those people that found their way into her life just to take advantage of her.

Did she treat her so attentively and listened to her only because of her looks? What if she had been after her body this whole time, just playing the long game?

Cassie hated the thought with passion. That was so far from who Selena was, and she knew it. Nonetheless, after years of experiences of the sort, she couldn't help but to overthink.

Howard functioned differently than a few years ago, and she resented the world for making her have to analyze every single interaction she had in order to stay safe. Or try to stay safe.

Would it really be that crazy to think Selena wouldn't be friends with her if she had moved to their town some years earlier, before puberty had knocked on her door and changed everything? She couldn't be so sure.

Being called beautiful wasn't unusual for the blonde, yet whenever she heard it from Selena it felt different than when most said it.

It was the words paired with the familiar voice, and the sweet eyes that she always looked at her with. Never was anyone more convincing.

But the what -ifs inside her head became relentless in days of uncomfortable silence between them, and coupled with built-up stress, she broke down at last, and told Suze about it.