Interlude

Chapter 12

- Back then -

For months Rose had been living with the horrifying possibility of losing her mother but now that it had really come to be, she fell apart. It seemed like her tears would never end. Her grief grew unsurmountable.

On the day of her mother's funeral Rose stood by her father. He had put up a brave front but they both knew he was broken inside. Her own sense of comprehension was lost. She wasn't aware of the proceedings around her. She wasn't aware of the people who gave their heartfelt condolences and sympathetic hugs. She wasn't aware that throughout the ceremony quiet tears fell from her eyes.

And she wasn't aware that Dev had one arm around her the whole time. He hadn't left her side for a moment.

He tried his best to talk to her. He apologized, more than once. But Rose had sunk into a shell and Dev was slowly running out of time. He had to head to California any day now.

"You should go." Rose said two weeks before he classes were to begin.

He hadn't even started packing. "I can't leave you here like this."

"I'm going to leave soon, too."

"No, you aren't. I know you deferred the semester."

Rose sighed, too exhausted to deny the truth.

"Rose, listen to me." They were sitting in her living room. Dev fell to his knees in front of her, bringing his face to her eye level. "I know this is hard but think again. Do you really want to defer? Maybe starting college now is what you need."

"I won't leave my dad here like this."

"Like what? Rose you cannot help him by stalling college."

"I won't go."

Dev's heart sank. He moved to sit cross legged, burying his face in his hands. For a long while they remained silent.

"There's no point, waiting. Go, Dev."

"Why are you doing this?"

"I'm doing nothing!" Her voice broke, anger surging into those blue eyes. "That's the problem. There's nothing I have been able to do. I watched for months, watched my own mother slip away and now she's gone. All I could do was nothing! And you and I..." She fell sideways, resting her head on a cushion, her body curling into a small space.

"I'll defer too." He muttered, shaking his head. "I'll wait for you to feel better."

"Please, Dev." She whispered, staring into nothingness. "Just leave."

"Rose, I promised your mother..."

"It was wrong on her part to make you promise that. She wasn't thinking straight."

"You know that's not true."

She blinked, painfully. "What is left in that promise? She isn't here anymore. And I..." she choked. "I don't want your help." Her mind was spiraling out of control. "I can't force you to leave for college. But if you stay I won't speak to you. I won't meet you. There's nothing left between us."

His insides burned with agony. "Do you really believe that?"

"Yes." Her voice felt alien even to her own ears.

Dev could delay his departure by only one more week. And in that week he tried every waking minute to get Rose to change her mind. Every attempt failed. The days ended and just like that, he found himself on a plane headed to San Francisco.

But he didn't give up even then. He made innumerable attempts to reach her. Dev's calls were repeatedly ignored, texts unanswered and emails deleted. He even called her dad. Dan was sympathetic but couldn't succeed to change his daughter's mind. Dev understood that she was hurting but his own heart could only take so much.

He missed her and he hated being away from her.

He couldn't concentrate on school and struggled with classes in his very first semester. Rose somehow found out. In a last act of defiance, she sent him a text, 'I miss you too. But you're better off without me." Then she changed her phone number. It wasn't that he couldn't reach her after that. But the message was his breaking point. It wrenched his heart. He finally did the one thing he thought he would never do - he gave up.

For months that followed, Rose dreamed of the last time she saw him.

It was the evening before his flight. She was waiting at the same spot where he usually stood. She didn't glance at his approaching form. When he stood beside her, she said, her eyes focused at the setting sun, "I'm glad you're leaving."

"That makes one of us."

"It's the right thing to do."

"Is it?" He turned his body to face her. "Ro," he whispered, "look at me."

And just like that, she did.

"If I call you, will you answer?" he asked. The question was futile. He knew the answer. But he couldn't help himself.

"No."

"Will you call me?"

Her eyes stared into his. Tears fell past her cheek. She shook her head. Swallowing a giant lump in her throat, she croaked. "This is for the best. I wish you happiness. Goodbye Devraj Malhotra."

The finality made him angry. He had made up his mind to accept her goodbye but he suddenly felt the urge to get something more...anything more. With an abruptness that startled them both, he pushed her against the bark of tree, letting her back collide with solid wood. He slammed him hands flat against the trunk on either side of her, caging her with his body.

"Dev!" her eyes grew wide with alarm.

He closed the distance between them. Reaching to hold her cheek in his palm, he swiped the tears away with his thumb. When he leaned forward to kiss her, she turned her face. It felt like someone had punched him. His lips pressed against her cheek with a terrific desperation. For a long moment neither moved.

"If you ever need me," he whispered. "You only have to call."

Her chest rose and fell rapidly. If she'd said a single word, given him a single indication, he would've dropped everything and stayed. She knew that.

She said nothing. She watched as his body jerked away from her. She watched as he turned around and took three steps head. He pivoted one last time to face her. His cheeks were streaked with tears. Her knees weakened and sunk to the ground, transferring her weight onto the earth beneath.

She watched, in agonizing silence, as he turned around and walked away...away from her life.