Coin Flip - Lo'ak

6:

Morning came, and yet my enthusiasm to be outside since the Sully's arrived, had completely vanished.

Rolling on my back, I rubbed the sleep from my eyes and once they adjusted to the sunlight, I could tell it was a later morning. The sun wasn't a soft blanket covering the vicinity of my pod and the walkway outside of my home, it was a harsher and brighter sun; the sun of a late morning.

Waking up at this time can be justified from falling asleep so late. It was from sobbing for longer than I had wanted to but the tears just kept falling.

My throat bobbed remembering the events of last night. I just wanted my mind erased of the pain.

Fortunately, my rumbling stomach reminded me of another problem: food.

I hadn't eaten for a very long time, and if I won't eat something soon, I would explode from the hunger. This also meant I couldn't go fishing - as it would take too long - but maybe I could ask Ao'nung for any food he may have laying around. That boy always hoarded his favourite sun-dried snacks, afraid they'd run out.

Maybe I could convince him to give me some in exchange of getting fish from my next large hunt. I was desperate.

Sitting up on my mat, I pulled my hair into an up-do, completely forgetting it would expose my puffy eyes from crying my heart out the night before.

And there it was. My never ending overthinking cycle: food and yesterday night.

I mean how could Lo'ak ever say that?

It was hard enough having the whole clan view me as an outcast, an orphan with no family. The one thing I could control was who my friends where and having only Ao'nung and Tsireya, I guess I wasn't really doing that good of a job either.

However, when I saw the Sully's arrive, a spark of hope erupted. I thought being alike would draw us close, I thought I could have a shot at being friends with them too. But Lo'ak completely ruined any hope. They viewed me like everyone else in the clan did.

His words practically called me a failure. While I couldn't control family, I could control who my friends were and how many I could have. Though in his eyes, I wasn't doing a good job at all. And it broke me. I mean, I knew I had no family, but having absolutely no one didn't really cross my mind. Maybe I was delusional about my friendship with Ao'nung and Tsireya?

Should I even ask Ao'nung for some food if we're not really that close?

No.

I can't let Lo'ak cause my insecurity. I was stronger than that. I needed to be stronger than that, otherwise I'd crumble.

Licking my lips in thought, I knew I needed to see Ao'nung. I was starving.

I left my hut and walked with my head held high, despite feeling incredibly low. I needed to feign confidence until I started to feel it. I couldn't continue feeling insecure. I mean, why did Lo'ak's opinion even matter?

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I kept walking past more pods and above the water. I can't wait to jump right in after my stomach is settled, it was calling my name.

I was almost at Ao'nung's pod when I heard some splashing out in the ocean.

Upon inspection, the splashing was the cause of Tuk, Tsireya, Kiri, their parents, and Ao'nung, all teaching or learning how to ride an ilu.

Great. I can't just ask him for food when he's clearly busy. Would I have to go find food on an empty stomach? I would eat my hand in the process just to ease my stomach.

Despite my joke, I had to face the facts. I needed to return and gather my satchel and dagger to go find some fruit on the island. Fishing would take too long, especially if it's any reflection of yesterday's events at the rock: a whole lot of nothing.