As A Stranger Or A Friend?: The Swallow And The Drowned Sailor

Mariel - 4 Sun's Dawn, 1246 A.D.

I woke with a small but relaxed sigh, wholly certain that I'd never been more warm or comfortable in my entire life. His body was curled around mine, his chest to my back, and his head buried into the nape of my neck while his arms held me firmly in place. How many cold nights had I wished for this? So many... I lay there, simply enjoying the quietness of this moment, but all too quickly, the bliss I felt began to taste sour in my mouth. What if I was dreaming? What if none of this was real?

He stirred then, as if my inner turmoil had been the one to rouse him from his sleep. A long, relaxed sigh escaped him, his exhaled breath washing over my neck like many warm and gentle fingers. I shivered, then felt as he removed one of his hands from my waist and, with it, turned my head gently so that we could look into each other's eyes. I felt weak under his gaze, not just because he was so handsome but because I still couldn't believe he was here. That we were together...

It was amusing to think that I'd once been terrified by the sight of him. Now, I could fall into his features over and over again and never tire of it. Still as presently smitten as I was by him, I couldn't help but remember the woman who was supposed to be his wife. The sourness from before returned with overwhelming force now. He'd said she wasn't, but how true was that? I'd believed him because it was what I wanted to hear and because I was feeling discarded. I'd not even considered what the truth might be and instead hastily followed him here.

What if he'd lied in his excitement to see me? What if he had children with that woman, and now she was left alone with them because he was here with me? A gaping pit of guilt formed in my stomach, and I immediately wanted to leave. The thought of driving a wedge into his marriage didn't sit right with me, even if he didn't seem to have any issue with it. He leaned in to kiss me when I placed my hand over the end of his snout. He seemed surprised but didn't force his way past me. In fact, he might even look a little heartbroken.

"Is that woman truly not your wife?" I asked softly.

He let out a sigh and sat up. "She nay be. I swear it."

"Who is she then?" I asked as I sat up, holding the blankets over my body to abate the cold.

"My cousin." He admitted with a grimace.

"O-Oh..." I chewed my lip for a moment, "Are you close?"

The question might be stupidly obvious to ask since his display with her was rather intimate and shocking, especially between those who should only be family. But they'd done things that genuinely made them seem like a couple, so it still seemed fair to ask.

"Nay— Just— Would ye 'llow me to explain thin's?"

I nodded.

I was glad he hadn't tried to skirt the question but was still disturbed by the revelation that the woman he'd been so close with was his cousin. The image of him eating a caramel out of her palm was now etched uncomfortably into my mind. Cousins? Cousins didn't do such things with one another... Still, I decided to withhold my judgment until I could hear what he had to say.

"To hear the story proper, I must tell ye what happened since ye been away..." He paused to look at me, "Will ye listen?"

"Yes." I replied with a nod.

"I wandered 'bout aimless till I 'turned to The Empire..."

The tale he told was fraught with anger, cruelty, and despair, something surprising and deeply upsetting for me to find out, as he'd outwardly seemed so happy. Though I suppose I should know better than anyone how deceiving appearances could be. Still, the shock of how his uncle and father had mistreated him stayed with me in a difficult place. However, it was thanks to that mistreatment that his grandmother felt compelled to intervene and they'd been able to escape along with his sisters, cousin, and a man called Lord Haphrex. Fate certainly had an odd and cruel way of moving people around. He explained to me that everything he and his cousin had been doing was an elaborate advertising scheme of hers, not genuine affection between them. And then, there was the disturbing revelation that his grandfather had murdered her father, his own son... I couldn't help but feel that he might not have had to face those cruel truths if I'd not sent him away.